Anxiety is born from the narcissist\u2019s inconsistent moods. Imagine living with somebody unable to be as vulnerable as you are by nature\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Hugs go neglected. Time is spent criticizing rather than loving, and nothing you do is ever good enough.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n It is unfortunate when you share a child with a narcissist, but there are ways you can give your child at least some <\/em>of the love and affection that is essential!<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s a parents job to provide love, nurture, affection, care and concern for their children. The vast majority of people view having children as a gift – but not the narcissist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Children need to know that they are safe and secure. If their needs are met, they grow to be rounded individuals with all the tools ready to pass down to another generation. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Having a narcissistic parent prevents that. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Unfortunately, those caught up with one or both parents as narcissists are going to have more of an uphill climb due to the dysfunctional environment. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Children don\u2019t get a say in who their parents are, but they should have a level of protection growing up from the exposure to narcissists. <\/p>\n\n\n\n More and more people are becoming acutely aware of this.<\/p>\n\n\n\n To even ask<\/em> that question is to suggest the narcissist can provide at least one <\/em>thing\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s safe to say a narcissist provides zero <\/em>of these 6 essential things. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Listening? Forget it. The narcissist hears, but they don\u2019t listen<\/em>. They might drop in and pick out a few choice words if it suits them. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Representing? No. Narcissists won\u2019t want to represent anybody. Children to them are assets and extensions of themselves – nothing more.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Which means\u2026 the child of a narcissist must conform.<\/p>\n\n\n\n So what can you <\/em>do to protect your own children from a narcissistic parent?<\/p>\n\n\n\n When your children\u2019s faces drop at the witnessing of narcissism, it\u2019s hard to process. You as an adult will be far more equipped to deal with their abusive, bullying ways but children? <\/p>\n\n\n\n Your <\/em>children?<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s natural to want to apologize for the actions of your narcissistic partner. To excuse their behavior with an, \u201cI\u2019m sorry they are the way they are. I\u2019m sure they\u2019re<\/em> sorry too,\u201d isn\u2019t going to cut it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Children are taught to say sorry for what they did wrong, with the promise to not do it again. You cannot make those same promises on behalf of anybody else, least of all a narcissist<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you normalize toxic behavior, you\u2019re far more likely to raise one of two children:<\/p>\n\n\n\n Those overly anxious and keen to please.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Those who follow in the footsteps of the narcissist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Both should be avoided.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Support your children.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Don\u2019t justify something you didn\u2019t do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Age doesn\u2019t discriminate when it comes to narcissistic jealousy. An adult can be jealous of a child, even their own!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Jealousy may come from:<\/p>\n\n\n\n The child getting to much attention.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n The child succeeding.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n The child being overly clever or gifted at something.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n The child being naturally bright, sparkly and shiny.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n When jealousy rears its ugly head, the narcissist too can become just as ugly. As far as they\u2019re concerned, a person is never too young or blood-related to be excused from their manipulation, control and down right abuse. <\/p>\n\n\n\n As the consequences of parental narcissistic abuse unfold, your child is going to need a safe space to figure out their emotions. If it\u2019s confusing for an adult to be gaslighted, it will be even more so for an impressionable child still figuring themselves out. <\/p>\n\n\n\n A safe space can involve listening, empathizing, understanding what they\u2019re saying, and continuing to be open for them to explore their feelings. <\/p>\n\n\n\n I always see how easy it is for children to close off to certain emotions. If they\u2019re told that crying is for wimps, or to \u2018man up\u2019 in other situations is to deny them of being able to feel vulnerable or sad. <\/p>\n\n\n\n As children age, they will learn to shut down any emotion that makes them appear weak, and those usually come out in other ways such as anger, rage, resentment, anxiety or depression. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Encouraging all <\/em>emotions will mean they will always permit themselves to feel<\/em> – something the narcissist can\u2019t do. <\/p>\n\n\n\n The narcissist can brutally sweep away hobbies and passions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n How dare my child be good at that, or better at it than me!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s baffling, right? I mean, even your own kids\u2026<\/em> I can\u2019t fathom it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s your job as the caring parent to let them pursue what they love and alway reiterate that nobody can take their pride and passion for something away from them. <\/p>\n\n\n\n They aren\u2019t going to learn what boundaries look like or mean from their narcissistic parent, so it\u2019s down to you to be there for this.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Teaching your children boundaries and how to apply them means they\u2019re far more likely to have stronger ones as they age. Non-negotiable boundaries are a narcissist’s worst nightmare. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n No means no – and to you or I, that\u2019s pretty simple, isn\u2019t it?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Narcissists constantly try to push people to their limits. If they hear \u2018no,\u2019 they assume it wasn\u2019t meant for them (that\u2019ll be the entitlement talking). <\/p>\n\n\n\n Teaching your child to say no can mean that in years to come, they will become stronger, more familiar and more confident in using the phrase. <\/p>\n\n\n\n This includes aiming it toward the narcissistic parent!<\/p>\n\n\n\n You know, I don\u2019t know your circumstances, and I would hate to assume things are so terrible that you\u2019d leave but\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2026If things are so terrible, you should consider some kind of \u2018what happens next.\u2019 Fleeing an abusive relationship is a courageous and bold move that will get messier before it starts to get better. If protecting your children can only come from leaving, you must do what\u2019s right for you. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Growing up with a narcissistic parent is one of the most confusing things for a child to witness and be a part of. When you\u2019re young, nothing about their character makes sense. The house you live in somehow always feels \u2018off.\u2019 Anxiety is born from the narcissist\u2019s inconsistent moods. Imagine living with somebody unable to … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":21457,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[598],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21404"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=21404"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21404\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21459,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21404\/revisions\/21459"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/21457"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=21404"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=21404"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=21404"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}![\"\"](\"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/How-to-protect-your-children-from-a-narcissistic-parent-1.jpg\")
<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\nThe Influence of Parents<\/strong><\/h1>\n\n\n\n
Children Generally Need:<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\n
Can a Narcissist Provide These Things?<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Protecting Your Children From a Narcissistic Parent<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Don\u2019t Apologize For Them<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Defend The Child<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Be Their Safe Space<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Encourage All Emotions<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Reiterate Their Hobbies and Passions<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Teach Them Boundaries<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Help Them Understand \u201cNo\u201d<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n
Leave if You Have To<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n