![\"\"](\"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/what-happens-when-narcissists-dont-get-their-way-1.jpg\")
<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n#1 Fits of Rage<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nNarcissists believe that they are superior to others, and as such, they also expect automatic compliance with their demands. When people give them exactly what they want, narcissists feel in control, and it reinforces their belief that others are beneath them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Narcissists must maintain this superiority because underneath their arrogant facade, they are quite unsure of themselves. Deep down, they feel inadequate and rely on external validation to maintain their sense of self. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
When you don\u2019t give a narcissist their way, they may react with rage. The threat to their ego is too much to handle, so they lash out in anger. They may yell, curse, destroy objects, or even act out in violence against you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
#2 The Silent Treatment<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nA narcissist is deeply wounded when you don\u2019t give them their way, and they\u2019ll be angry with you for failing to comply with their request. To punish you, they may hit you with the silent treatment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This can involve disappearing for several days, or refusing to answer your calls or texts. The narcissist hopes that you\u2019ll be so upset by the silent treatment that you\u2019ll do whatever you can to avoid earning it again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In essence, the narcissist is training you to give them whatever they want, so you don\u2019t have to endure the pain of them ghosting you. Once again, the narcissist maintains control over your behavior. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
#3 Toddler-Like Tantrums<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nWe expect toddlers to have meltdowns when they don\u2019t get what they want, but eventually, they grow out of that behavior. Unfortunately, the narcissist, who is quite emotionally stunted, never grew out of this childlike behavior.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
If it seems like the narcissist is throwing a tantrum, they probably are. It can be shocking to witness this behavior from an adult, but it\u2019s par for the course for a narcissist who didn\u2019t get their way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When you don\u2019t give the narcissist their way, they are likely to whine, complain, and carry on until you give in. They may accuse you of being selfish, gripe about how unfair the world is, or throw insults your way to make themselves feel better.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The narcissist probably doesn\u2019t realize how immature their behavior looks during a tantrum, and they don\u2019t care. They will rant and rave, showing a complete loss of emotional control. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
This behavior is typically so shocking to everyone around the narcissist that they will shift their behavior to avoid setting the narcissist off again. Over time, you\u2019ll notice that you\u2019re constantly walking on eggshells to avoid another tantrum. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
#4 Seeking Revenge<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nA narcissist who didn\u2019t get what they wanted may go so far as to seek revenge. If you fail to comply with their demands, the narcissist will perceive that you\u2019re being intentionally malicious, seeking to sabotage their plans.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The narcissist cannot conceive of a world in which they don\u2019t always get what they want. They think they\u2019re deserving of automatic compliance with all of their requests. When you fail to comply, the narcissist believes that you have wronged them and are deserving of punishment. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As an attempt at revenge, the narcissist may try to sabotage your goals. This can look like spreading rumors to ruin your reputation, interfering with a project or goal you\u2019re working toward, or even trying to get you in trouble at work. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
#5 Emotional Manipulation<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nThe narcissist needs to maintain power and control over you, and when you don\u2019t give them their way, they panic because they think they are losing control. To regain control, they will bring out all their most manipulative tactics to convince you you\u2019re in the wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
They might triangulate you by pulling a third party, such as a friend or family member, into the conflict. They\u2019ll tell you that this third person thinks you\u2019re being unfair and selfish.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Alternatively, they might gaslight you, telling you you\u2019re crazy for not giving them their way. If all other tactics fail, they\u2019ll likely resort to degrading you until you\u2019re so broken down that you give them whatever they\u2019re asking for. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
#6 Seeking Alternative Sources of Narcissistic Supply <\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nIf you\u2019re in a relationship with a narcissist, your job is to be a source of narcissistic supply. This means you feed the narcissist\u2019s ego by showering them with love and attention and meeting all of their demands.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
If you don\u2019t give the narcissist their way, you aren\u2019t fulfilling your duties as a source of supply. A narcissist is likely to seek out alternative sources of supply to fuel their wounded ego.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
They may cheat on you behind your back with a new target who is still too blind to see through their games. Or, they might outwardly tell you that they’ll get it elsewhere if you don\u2019t give them what they want. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Other Considerations<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nWe\u2019ve spent a great deal of time talking about how the narcissist acts when their significant other doesn\u2019t give them their way. It\u2019s also important to keep in mind that narcissistic reactions like the ones discussed above will likely occur in any scenario in which the narcissist doesn\u2019t get what they want. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
If a friend or family member doesn\u2019t give them their way, they\u2019ll probably show some of the behaviors above. Narcissistic rage and tantrums can also occur if they don\u2019t get their way at work or if they don\u2019t get special treatment while out in public.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
For instance, the narcissist may expect special treatment from retail workers or restaurant staff. When they don\u2019t get what they want, they are likely to become angered and have no qualms about screaming and yelling at staff. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
If you\u2019re the narcissist\u2019s partner, you may also pay the price for others angering the narcissist. When you try to reason with them, you\u2019ll also be on the receiving end of their rage. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Or, they might take some of their frustration out on you. Ultimately, they expect you to side with them and feed their ego so they can feel superior again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Regardless of who is failing to give the narcissist exactly what they want, they\u2019re likely to react with rage, tantrums, or vindictive behavior. Not getting their way makes the narcissist feel inferior and triggers their greatest fear: being seen as anything other than special. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Narcissists aren\u2019t too fond of being told \u201cno.\u201d If you\u2019ve spent any time interacting with a narcissist, you\u2019re probably aware of this. You know that their ego can\u2019t tolerate not getting exactly what it wants. The first time you witness a narcissist not getting their way, you might be shocked or confused by their reaction. … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":20633,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20615"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20615"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20615\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20635,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20615\/revisions\/20635"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/20633"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20615"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20615"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20615"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
A narcissist is deeply wounded when you don\u2019t give them their way, and they\u2019ll be angry with you for failing to comply with their request. To punish you, they may hit you with the silent treatment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This can involve disappearing for several days, or refusing to answer your calls or texts. The narcissist hopes that you\u2019ll be so upset by the silent treatment that you\u2019ll do whatever you can to avoid earning it again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In essence, the narcissist is training you to give them whatever they want, so you don\u2019t have to endure the pain of them ghosting you. Once again, the narcissist maintains control over your behavior. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
#3 Toddler-Like Tantrums<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nWe expect toddlers to have meltdowns when they don\u2019t get what they want, but eventually, they grow out of that behavior. Unfortunately, the narcissist, who is quite emotionally stunted, never grew out of this childlike behavior.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
If it seems like the narcissist is throwing a tantrum, they probably are. It can be shocking to witness this behavior from an adult, but it\u2019s par for the course for a narcissist who didn\u2019t get their way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When you don\u2019t give the narcissist their way, they are likely to whine, complain, and carry on until you give in. They may accuse you of being selfish, gripe about how unfair the world is, or throw insults your way to make themselves feel better.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The narcissist probably doesn\u2019t realize how immature their behavior looks during a tantrum, and they don\u2019t care. They will rant and rave, showing a complete loss of emotional control. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
This behavior is typically so shocking to everyone around the narcissist that they will shift their behavior to avoid setting the narcissist off again. Over time, you\u2019ll notice that you\u2019re constantly walking on eggshells to avoid another tantrum. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
#4 Seeking Revenge<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nA narcissist who didn\u2019t get what they wanted may go so far as to seek revenge. If you fail to comply with their demands, the narcissist will perceive that you\u2019re being intentionally malicious, seeking to sabotage their plans.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The narcissist cannot conceive of a world in which they don\u2019t always get what they want. They think they\u2019re deserving of automatic compliance with all of their requests. When you fail to comply, the narcissist believes that you have wronged them and are deserving of punishment. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As an attempt at revenge, the narcissist may try to sabotage your goals. This can look like spreading rumors to ruin your reputation, interfering with a project or goal you\u2019re working toward, or even trying to get you in trouble at work. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
#5 Emotional Manipulation<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nThe narcissist needs to maintain power and control over you, and when you don\u2019t give them their way, they panic because they think they are losing control. To regain control, they will bring out all their most manipulative tactics to convince you you\u2019re in the wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
They might triangulate you by pulling a third party, such as a friend or family member, into the conflict. They\u2019ll tell you that this third person thinks you\u2019re being unfair and selfish.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Alternatively, they might gaslight you, telling you you\u2019re crazy for not giving them their way. If all other tactics fail, they\u2019ll likely resort to degrading you until you\u2019re so broken down that you give them whatever they\u2019re asking for. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
#6 Seeking Alternative Sources of Narcissistic Supply <\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nIf you\u2019re in a relationship with a narcissist, your job is to be a source of narcissistic supply. This means you feed the narcissist\u2019s ego by showering them with love and attention and meeting all of their demands.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
If you don\u2019t give the narcissist their way, you aren\u2019t fulfilling your duties as a source of supply. A narcissist is likely to seek out alternative sources of supply to fuel their wounded ego.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
They may cheat on you behind your back with a new target who is still too blind to see through their games. Or, they might outwardly tell you that they’ll get it elsewhere if you don\u2019t give them what they want. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Other Considerations<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nWe\u2019ve spent a great deal of time talking about how the narcissist acts when their significant other doesn\u2019t give them their way. It\u2019s also important to keep in mind that narcissistic reactions like the ones discussed above will likely occur in any scenario in which the narcissist doesn\u2019t get what they want. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
If a friend or family member doesn\u2019t give them their way, they\u2019ll probably show some of the behaviors above. Narcissistic rage and tantrums can also occur if they don\u2019t get their way at work or if they don\u2019t get special treatment while out in public.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
For instance, the narcissist may expect special treatment from retail workers or restaurant staff. When they don\u2019t get what they want, they are likely to become angered and have no qualms about screaming and yelling at staff. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
If you\u2019re the narcissist\u2019s partner, you may also pay the price for others angering the narcissist. When you try to reason with them, you\u2019ll also be on the receiving end of their rage. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Or, they might take some of their frustration out on you. Ultimately, they expect you to side with them and feed their ego so they can feel superior again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Regardless of who is failing to give the narcissist exactly what they want, they\u2019re likely to react with rage, tantrums, or vindictive behavior. Not getting their way makes the narcissist feel inferior and triggers their greatest fear: being seen as anything other than special. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Narcissists aren\u2019t too fond of being told \u201cno.\u201d If you\u2019ve spent any time interacting with a narcissist, you\u2019re probably aware of this. You know that their ego can\u2019t tolerate not getting exactly what it wants. The first time you witness a narcissist not getting their way, you might be shocked or confused by their reaction. … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":20633,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20615"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20615"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20615\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20635,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20615\/revisions\/20635"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/20633"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20615"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20615"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20615"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
A narcissist who didn\u2019t get what they wanted may go so far as to seek revenge. If you fail to comply with their demands, the narcissist will perceive that you\u2019re being intentionally malicious, seeking to sabotage their plans.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The narcissist cannot conceive of a world in which they don\u2019t always get what they want. They think they\u2019re deserving of automatic compliance with all of their requests. When you fail to comply, the narcissist believes that you have wronged them and are deserving of punishment. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
As an attempt at revenge, the narcissist may try to sabotage your goals. This can look like spreading rumors to ruin your reputation, interfering with a project or goal you\u2019re working toward, or even trying to get you in trouble at work. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
#5 Emotional Manipulation<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nThe narcissist needs to maintain power and control over you, and when you don\u2019t give them their way, they panic because they think they are losing control. To regain control, they will bring out all their most manipulative tactics to convince you you\u2019re in the wrong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
They might triangulate you by pulling a third party, such as a friend or family member, into the conflict. They\u2019ll tell you that this third person thinks you\u2019re being unfair and selfish.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Alternatively, they might gaslight you, telling you you\u2019re crazy for not giving them their way. If all other tactics fail, they\u2019ll likely resort to degrading you until you\u2019re so broken down that you give them whatever they\u2019re asking for. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
#6 Seeking Alternative Sources of Narcissistic Supply <\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nIf you\u2019re in a relationship with a narcissist, your job is to be a source of narcissistic supply. This means you feed the narcissist\u2019s ego by showering them with love and attention and meeting all of their demands.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
If you don\u2019t give the narcissist their way, you aren\u2019t fulfilling your duties as a source of supply. A narcissist is likely to seek out alternative sources of supply to fuel their wounded ego.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
They may cheat on you behind your back with a new target who is still too blind to see through their games. Or, they might outwardly tell you that they’ll get it elsewhere if you don\u2019t give them what they want. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Other Considerations<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\nWe\u2019ve spent a great deal of time talking about how the narcissist acts when their significant other doesn\u2019t give them their way. It\u2019s also important to keep in mind that narcissistic reactions like the ones discussed above will likely occur in any scenario in which the narcissist doesn\u2019t get what they want. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
If a friend or family member doesn\u2019t give them their way, they\u2019ll probably show some of the behaviors above. Narcissistic rage and tantrums can also occur if they don\u2019t get their way at work or if they don\u2019t get special treatment while out in public.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
For instance, the narcissist may expect special treatment from retail workers or restaurant staff. When they don\u2019t get what they want, they are likely to become angered and have no qualms about screaming and yelling at staff. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
If you\u2019re the narcissist\u2019s partner, you may also pay the price for others angering the narcissist. When you try to reason with them, you\u2019ll also be on the receiving end of their rage. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Or, they might take some of their frustration out on you. Ultimately, they expect you to side with them and feed their ego so they can feel superior again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Regardless of who is failing to give the narcissist exactly what they want, they\u2019re likely to react with rage, tantrums, or vindictive behavior. Not getting their way makes the narcissist feel inferior and triggers their greatest fear: being seen as anything other than special. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Narcissists aren\u2019t too fond of being told \u201cno.\u201d If you\u2019ve spent any time interacting with a narcissist, you\u2019re probably aware of this. You know that their ego can\u2019t tolerate not getting exactly what it wants. The first time you witness a narcissist not getting their way, you might be shocked or confused by their reaction. … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":20633,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20615"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20615"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20615\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20635,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20615\/revisions\/20635"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/20633"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20615"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20615"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20615"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
If you\u2019re in a relationship with a narcissist, your job is to be a source of narcissistic supply. This means you feed the narcissist\u2019s ego by showering them with love and attention and meeting all of their demands.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
If you don\u2019t give the narcissist their way, you aren\u2019t fulfilling your duties as a source of supply. A narcissist is likely to seek out alternative sources of supply to fuel their wounded ego.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
They may cheat on you behind your back with a new target who is still too blind to see through their games. Or, they might outwardly tell you that they’ll get it elsewhere if you don\u2019t give them what they want. <\/p>\n\n\n\n