{"id":20594,"date":"2024-04-02T14:38:24","date_gmt":"2024-04-02T13:38:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/?p=20594"},"modified":"2024-04-02T14:38:25","modified_gmt":"2024-04-02T13:38:25","slug":"the-disturbing-reason-why-narcissists-love-playing-the-victim","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/the-disturbing-reason-why-narcissists-love-playing-the-victim\/","title":{"rendered":"The Disturbing Reason Why Narcissists Love Playing the Victim"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

You\u2019ve heard them play their violins, and you\u2019ve seen them pout their way to true Victimville – that\u2019s right – narcissists love <\/em>to make everybody think they\u2019ve been wronged.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Is it always <\/em>everybody else\u2019s fault?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Well\u2026 you <\/em>know the answer – absolutely not!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Narcissists want you pegged as the bad guy so the heat is off them, but knowing why <\/em>they do it is the key to unlocking your innocence and walking away free of their toxicity. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Let\u2019s take a look at why the narcissist loves being front and center when it comes to playing the victim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Narcissists and Victim Mentality<\/strong><\/h1>\n\n\n\n

Narcissists are not built like you and I. They have<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Life is so Hard!<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Narcissists have no difficulties stepping over your boundaries, but they will act as though their life’s so hard as they\u2019re doing it. This makes it impossible for you to say that you feel something is wrong and be heard.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Life becomes hard for the narcissist. They don\u2019t like the injustice of being on the receiving end of other people\u2019s anger or inappropriateness and because of that, they will absolutely destroy you with their victimization mode. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

What they need when life gets hard is a huge dose of sympathy, and they can get this by admitting to anyone who will listen how hard their life is.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

How busy they are.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

How overworked and underappreciated they are.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

How their doctor can\u2019t make time for them soon enough.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

How bad the traffic was (just for them\u2026nobody else\u2026).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

How they are saving for that huge house, luxury car, amazing holiday but the bills are just too much <\/em>right now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nothing is harder than a narcissist\u2019s life. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Boo hoo, right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They Love the Control<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

When a narcissist is playing the victim, it usually means they are wanting to play the fame of control. Now, they can do this in dozens of ways, but to appear to be the victim is one of their favorites. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

A narcissist will think, \u201cHey, you know what I really <\/em>need? I need somebody to give me all the attention in the world and remind me how fabulous I am.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Boom. They not only have their control, but a healthy dollop of attention too. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

A narcissist isn\u2019t happy unless they are the ones pulling the strings and painting the specific picture they want to see – regardless of who gets hurt in the process.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Disturbing, I know.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Manipulation is Their Favorite Game<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Whether covert or overt, a narcissist will manipulate any situation to work in their favor. It\u2019s like molding a lump of clay into whatever you want it to be – and they do it so well. Most people may not even notice, but once you spot the signs of a narcissist, you simply cannot <\/em>unsee them. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Woe is me!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

A narcissist couldn\u2019t even spell compassion, let alone allow its meaning to enter their life positively. That doesn’t mean they don\u2019t still need <\/em>it. They need what they lack otherwise they will crumble entirely, so to gain it, they play the victim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And they play it very, very <\/em>well. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Attention Everyone!<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

The attention a narcissist craves comes from a few different places. One is boredom – they just have <\/em>to have some drama going on because they\u2019re not satisfied with living a peaceful life. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The other is the simple fact that a narcissist needs it to help them forget how much they internally hate themselves. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Think about it, if a narcissist is getting attention from somebody – anybody – then that means they are being validated. They can be as mean and terrible as they want, but if they find the right person, they can forget about all of that and be reminded how wonderful they are. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

If nobody is focusing on them – they can\u2019t stand it. They need to feel important, so they act <\/em>as  though something important is going on. Usually that means they are either bragging\u2026 or sobbing and playing the victim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What a Good Person They Are\u2026<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI don\u2019t deserve this.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAll I do for people.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can they treat me like this?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI\u2019ve worked and worked\u2026 and for what?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cI might be unwell\u2026 I need to have some tests. Why me?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you can think of a reason they call themselves such good people, you can bet they will get straight onto it and tell the world.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What they want to hear is:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cOh, you poor thing!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cCan I do anything to help?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou\u2019re amazing, you\u2019ve got this!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

What does this do? It sparks and ignites the idea that they are <\/em>good and that people love and care about them. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Playing the victim is all part of the larger plan that gets them into the minds and thoughts of others so that they are constantly a part of something. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Take No More!<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

If you have fallen into the trap of victimizing a narcissist, you probably won\u2019t be making that same mistake again. Hearing their sob stories and how tough life is for them is how they get to you. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The positive attention they get feeds <\/em>their self-esteem, because they are unable to do so themselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Imagine what sort of a life that is?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Underneath it all\u2026 very sad, and very lonely. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

This sense of emotional stability they are searching high and low for never came to them or was offered to them as a child. They grew up lacking a basic, fundamental type of care and affection – so they learned quickly how to steal it from everybody else. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Take pity on any narcissist who craves to be the victim. Try not to love them more because of it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Instead, wish their lives to be better someday.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Remember:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n