Figuring out why narcissistic people act like victims is complex – but once you have them pegged – you can spot them a mile away. Luckily, this is a good place to start:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s Not Your Fault!<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n So, in what ways do narcissists act like the victim, and what can you do to keep your eyes peeled for their strategic game-playing approaches?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Who would put it past the narcissist to draw attention to themselves to gain a sympathetic nod or hum of sympathy from anybody who cares enough to listen? <\/p>\n\n\n\n The people inclined to listen are those who have no idea how destructive the narcissist can be and how they relish being listened to – even if what they say is a total lie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Narcissists do this because they feel deprived of something, and that usually is <\/em>attention of some kind. If you feel unwell, they feel even worse. If it\u2019s your birthday, they will raise the issue of never getting half the affection you do when it\u2019s theirs. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Depriving them of what they call out for is almost to approve their secret idea that they have an underdeveloped identity\u2014unable to validate themselves internally. They need <\/em>attention, like it’s the only fuel to keep them going.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n Guess who suffers – that\u2019s right – you! <\/em>(they\u2019d answer them<\/em>, of course).<\/p>\n\n\n\n Narcissists house intense emotions. If they feel wronged, their pride will be dented, and the grudge accompanying the dent can last a lifetime. They feel they deserve all the love and affection possible from anybody willing to dish it out, and if you don\u2019t meet those requirements, they will tell their sob story to somebody else.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Life is unfair to the narcissist despite being part of a human race that constantly deals with setbacks. <\/p>\n\n\n\n They can be left enraged by the slightest thing, including any attempt to take something you have said or done out of context. It doesn\u2019t matter how you feel\u2014they will use their tactics to make you feel as though you were the perpetrator and they were the victim.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A text was misconstrued, a tone of voice they happened to take offense to, and even posting something that caught their annoyance on social media – how dare you?<\/p>\n\n\n\n This hypersensitivity will draw you into their blame game – you\u2019ll be lucky to win.<\/p>\n\n\n\n What better way to gather a team of people who can pander and patch up the wounds of an emotionally inept narcissist intent on making themselves the victim than\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u2026the pity party!<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Narcissists draw in crowds like town criers – hear ye, hear ye, I have a story to tell – woe is me! They know the people who will fall for their sob stories, and just like the Pied Piper, they will play the tune to the village of sympathetic know-no-betters, who dance to their tune.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Pity parties are a performance, and those who choose to purchase a ticket are getting a very distorted version of actual events in the life of the narcissist. The best thing to do is keep your money in your pocket and save it for a real <\/em>show.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Would it even surprise you to know that sometimes, you just happened to be on the narcissist’s hit list? They have it in for you. Maybe you wronged them unintentionally, or things are just going so well for you now that they can\u2019t stand it.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Blaming you for something you either did without intent or didn\u2019t do is their way of bringing you down a peg or two. It might be you this week and somebody else another week. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Either way, they will cherry-pick who they want to put in the hot seat so they can make you the bad person while they go ahead and remain the one with their tail hung rather pathetically between their legs.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n It is a purposefully designed attempt to boost their self-esteem and a typically childish way of handling how envious or alienated they feel.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n Do you ever hear the words:<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI\u2019m sorry you\u2019re going through this, what can I do to help?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThis sounds terrible. I\u2019m here for you if you need me.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cI care about you and I am here to listen.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Likely, no. <\/p>\n\n\n\n This is because for these words to be muttered in the slightest and meant, there needs to be a clear and healthy run of empathy in their veins\u2014which doesn\u2019t exist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Not even a little bit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The narcissist will never look at a situation from any other perspective but their own – so if you think you are going to be the one who they make time for – you\u2019re wrong. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Any time is conditional and rarely kept between the two of you. You cannot expect someone with zero empathy to take an interest in you – which is why they use their lack of ability to connect with you to shift victim mode their way.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n Let\u2019s call a spade a spade\u2014the narcissist hates themselves. You wouldn\u2019t think this is the case because they come across as confident and self-assured, but that\u2019s only because they\u2019ve begged, borrowed, or stolen these traits from people who have <\/em>hearts.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n Seeking love can come in all different ways, but they will be the first to almost sing about those who have broken their hearts or hurt them somehow.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cWhat\u2019s wrong with me?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cHow could they hurt me?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cThey were the love of my life.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n These phrases are popular with the narcissist who has been \u2018abandoned\u2019 by love. What they don\u2019t <\/em>make public is that they push and push their victims to the point where they end the relationship and then tell the world, almost as if it were a world news headline, that they have been left heartbroken. <\/em>\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n They need love\u2014all the time\u2014because they cannot provide it for themselves. They cannot look in the mirror and say, \u2018I love what I see, I love who I am.\u2019\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n As a result – they blame you. <\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Narcissists are great storytellers – and the more jaw-dropping the narrative – the more of an audience they will draw. To add to their grandiose view of absolutely everything, they will spin a narrative to victimize themselves as regularly as possible. In truth, they believe they truly are the victim – but you know it\u2019s … Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":20376,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20368"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20368"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20368\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20566,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20368\/revisions\/20566"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/20376"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20368"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20368"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20368"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}They Constantly Feel Deprived<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
![\"\"](\"https:\/\/thenarcissisticlife.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/DALL\u00b7E-2024-03-20-13.50.04-A-digital-vector-illustration-showing-a-narcissistic-individual-feeling-deprived-of-attention.-The-scene-is-set-in-a-social-setting-perhaps-a-party-o.webp\")
<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\nThey are Hypersensitive<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\nThey\u2019re Holding a Pity Party<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\nThey Want to Blame You<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\nTheir Empathy Levels Run on Empty<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\nThey Need Love – Desperately<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n