Who would have thought three little words could make a narcissist panic so much? Surely this can’t be true!
I take great pleasure in telling you that there are three words that, when put together, will absolutely send the fear of God into them all.
I’m not one for promoting the act of injecting panic, but when it comes to narcissists, you’ve got to do what you’ve got to do, in order to survive it all.
If that means being knowledgeable on what you can do to earn your power back – so be it!
Panic? Really?
You’d think narcissists were incapable of panicking. After all, they’re so sure of themselves.
They absolutely love to brag, to show off, to demonstrate their status to the whole of society (or anybody who will actually listen). But you know, narcissists are human too, and they slip up.
Where they’re meant to be rock solid people who are affected by nothing and nobody, they do show themselves up at times.
Now, the key here is to remember that whatever issue they have, it’s not your fault.
And the reason for your three words isn’t your fault either (that will make sense when you read them!)
Remember The True Narcissist Character
It’s what it all boils down to, isn’t it?
The true character of a narcissist is one that strives for outer perfection, while struggling with inner imperfections, demons, and self-hatred.
That kind of person is never going to live a life of equilibrium. How can they? It just isn’t possible, so what do they do?
They fake it. They fake everything. They fake friendships, love, happiness, fulfillment just so they can have people around them they can move around on their invisible chessboard.
We are all pawn pieces to their game.
Ego Only an Act
As we know, the ego only serves to reiterate the status of the narcissist, which serves them, and not you.
They want to be the best, so they dedicate their life to convincing everybody that’s what they are.
It’s all an act. Get a narcissist home alone and they won’t even fully be able to look at themselves in the mirror, unless they’re checking out their abs or something. Ask any of them to look at their face for long enough, and they will crack.
They can’t do it.
They don’t have the ability to look deeply into their own soul and feel who they truly are.
Love Knowing You Can Control
I want you to really know that it’s good that you can still control the narrative anytime you want to.
The following three words will not only make every narcissist panic, but it will fundamentally change the entire dynamic from there on out.
The question is…
…Are you ready for them?
Those Three Words…
I know you.
Sounds so innocent, doesn’t it?
You know them.
It is almost romantic. If you use it on somebody you really know and care for, it can be a reassuring way to validate them.
But when you’re using it on the overly paranoid narcissist, you aren’t going to give them that warm, loving feeling.
Instead, they will panic. They will feel that fear creeping up inside them that they try so hard every day to quash and ignore.
You know them.
What They Do To The Narcissist
Knowing the narcissist to the truest extent possible means you have cut through all their bullshit, and are finally getting to the nitty gritty.
You don’t fall for the charm any more. You see the harm in all they do, say, feel and express outwardly. But let’s get to something more important.
You feel it, too. You feel the way they’ve changed you. You notice all the different ways you respond to the world around you.
You’re more scared, more anxious, more depressed, and you retreat from what you’d once relish in.
The joy from your life has been erased, and you don’t understand how you’re going to get it back.
Their time is up, and you’ve had just about enough of it.
So when I tell you what your words do to the narcissist, it’s all because they have made you feel like you feel. Your words are a consequence of their actions.
You’re not telling them to start a war, or to burn the narcissist’s reputation. You’re saying them because those words are the truth.
Whatever that does to the narcissist is down to their own doing, and for them to deal with.
Sadly, they don’t deal. They just panic.
Watching The Narcissist Panic
I love to ask clients when I can about their experiences. I asked five of them what they thought it was like to watch the narcissist they know panic, and this is what they said.
“It was like watching my favorite movie, actually. I enjoyed it. Not because I’m some kind of psychopath, but because it confirmed to me that I was right. I knew he was a narcissist, and I neer had the courage or even self-assurance to put it out there.”
“I felt relief when I saw her panic. I knew I’d got her to a point where she couldn’t talk her way out of it. She used to accuse so many people she knew of being a narcissist, but in my own head I thought, “No. It’s you.” I was right.”
“I worried a little bit what would happen once I put my thoughts across to him.
I don’t have a great track record of being direct, so it took a lot for me. The fear is there, isn’t it?
You don’t want to rock the boat or make things worse. But when I finally asked him and I saw the panic in his eyes, I just knew.
He knew that I knew, and there was no going back from that.”
“I regret the way I asked her. It came out in an argument, so she was already pissed off.
I knew her, and I’d known she was toxic as soon as that mask started to slip. She was always passionate, so her panic had a lot of panic in it, if that makes sense.
It felt nice to know that I was right, especially knowing I am always told I’m wrong.”
“I watched him closely. The panic was fleeting, really. He knew he had to cover his fear of being exposed, and he did that by refusing to speak to me for the next three days.
We split up eventually, but that was the day it all changed. I’m pleased I asked.
It was like a switch that had been stuck finally went on, and I was able to take a bit of my power back.”
