Last Updated on September 14, 2021 by Alexander Burgemeester
Want to learn what his kiss says about how he feels about you? This article will run through 29 different ways men kiss and what each one reveals about his relationship and feelings for you.
And spoiler alert: It may surprise you how much you can tell about a guy just by how he kisses you. It’s a veritable window to his soul if you know what to watch out for.
What Does His Kiss Say About His Feelings?
Okay, so let’s say he just kissed you, what does his kiss mean?
- Was it a friendly kiss, and did he really mean nothing by it?
- Or does he secretly have feelings for you, and snuck in a kiss hoping you’ll get the message without him saying anything?
- Is he in love with you, and he’s not shy about showing it by kissing you?
- Or does he just want to get in your pants?
Well, guess what—those are the four possible meanings of a kiss. Either he only sees you as a friend, or he’s secretly in love with you, or he’s confidently professing his love… or if he’s trying to have sex with you.
So, what’s his deal? Here’s the good news: It’s easy to tell if you remember the kind of kiss he gave you. Let’s find out.
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Signs He Only Sees You as a Friend
What are the “harmless” types of kisses? Since we live in a society where most kisses are still reserved for deeper relationships, only two of the 29 kisses fall under the “friendly and harmless” category. They are:
#1: The Peck on the Cheek
It can be argued that this isn’t a proper kiss, because (1) it’s really quick, and (2) his lips may have even been pursed or sucked in when they touched your cheek.
Why would he kiss you this way? The key word is propriety. A quick, half-hearted kiss has a much lower chance of being misconstrued as inappropriate. It’s an easy safeguard for a male population that’s shaken by the #MeToo era, so don’t blame him.
And yes—he most likely sees you as only a friend. Sorry if you find that disappointing.
#2: A Proper Kiss on the Cheek
This is the same as Kiss #1, except it’s a proper kiss with puckered lips. Yet again, it’s only on the cheek. In many cultures, it’s acceptable to use this kiss on older relatives and very good friends.
How to Feel About Friendly Kisses?
So, if he pecked or kissed you on the cheek, it probably means he only sees you as a friend. If you feel the same way about him, then you can safely think nothing of his kiss. If anything, it makes your friendship stronger.
On the other hand, if you’re secretly attracted to him and you’re waiting for him to make a move, this isn’t it. He probably doesn’t feel the same way about you. Until, of course, he gives you one of the kisses in the next category…
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How to Tell He Likes You By the Way He Kisses You?
Now, let’s talk about “revealing” kisses, so-called because they reveal his feelings. He secretly likes you, and he’s hoping you’ll notice it and return his feelings. There are 8 kinds of revealing kisses, and here they are:
#3: A Kiss on the Hand
This is as chivalric and gentlemanly as it gets. When he kisses you on the back of your hand, it’s a sign of appreciation and affection—and he hopes you’ll get the old-fashioned reference. In all the old movies, the gent always kisses his lady’s hand—and most times, they end up together.
He’s hoping you feel the same way, warm up to him, and take your relationship to the next level.
#4: The Blown Kiss
This is when he kisses his hand and then “blows” the kiss your way. It’s often fun and harmless—like something kids would do—and yet it can be interpreted as a sign of interest. It’s like he’s hoping he could show his affection without other people noticing.
Do you feel the same way about him? Try this: The next time he does it, blow a kiss back in return. It just might give him the confidence to tell you how he really feels later on.
#5: A Kiss on the Nose
This is another fun kind of kiss. It’s playful, and it reminds people of happier times when they were still kids. Likewise, when he kisses you on the nose, it may be an excuse to kiss you without being too obvious about his feelings.
#6: The Virgin Kiss
It’s called the “virgin” kiss because it feels like it came from a guy who was inexperienced, uncertain, or nervous. When he kissed you, was it awkward, unsure, or intentionally silly? Did it feel like he lost in a game of Truth or Dare, and he was dared to kiss you?
If so, he may have felt like he was taking a huge risk—and you were worth it.
#7: Closed-Mouth Kiss
Remember Kiss #1: the “peck on the cheek”? The closed-mouth kiss is similar in the sense that he also purses or sucks in his lips. The only difference—he kisses you on the lips, not the cheek. And with that slight change comes a whole different meaning.
He has feelings for you, but he’s trying to avoid directly telling you. So he gives you a kiss that’s on the border of “safe” and “sensual,” hoping you’ll help him out.
#8: A Silly Kiss
Any kind of “silly kiss” falls under this one—air kisses, kisses with weird sound effects, etc. On the surface, they’re friendly and harmless, but they can develop into a sort of “secret handshake” between you. And it’s likely that’s precisely what he wishes would happen.
#9: A Kiss to Make You Stop Talking
This is the kiss he makes when he wants you to stop talking—normally when you’re angry or ranting. If he only saw you as a friend, he might just give you a hug and tell you everything will be okay. In your case, he kissed you.
It doesn’t matter where he kissed you—if it was to make you stop talking, it’s a sign he secretly likes you. It’s almost instinctive—you’re in distress, and he wants to be your hero.
#10: Kiss on the Corner of Your Mouth
This one’s probably the most obvious of all revealing kisses. He kisses you on the cheek, but his lips are really close to yours. He kisses you on the corner of your mouth—a millimeter more and your lips would have touched.
It can’t be clearer—it’s like he’s asking permission to kiss you for real.
How to Feel About Revealing Kisses
Now, how should you feel about these revealing types of kisses? It’ll depend on how you feel about him, too.
If you only see him as a friend, it’s safe to brush it off and continue your friendship. If he’s smart enough, he’ll get the message that you’re not interested, and he’ll lay off the kissing.
Meanwhile, if you do like him too, then these revealing kisses may be flattering or concerning. It’s exciting to know he feels the same way you do, but it may be concerning that he’s not as confident as you’d like him to be. In this case, it may be best to return the favor, drop a hint, and see what he’ll do next.
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How to Tell He Loves You By His Kiss?
Sometimes, men kiss the women they secretly love to openly show their feelings. They’re not even hiding it anymore, and they’re not asking for your permission. Now, his kiss is an invitation to return the gesture and bring your relationship to the next level.
Take note, though: When a guy openly shows his feelings by kissing you, it could mean two things. First, he might truly be in love with you and wants something more serious. Second, he might be trying to lead you on, because all he really wants is to get in your pants.
So how do you tell what his deal is? If he kisses you in any of the following 9 ways, you can be quite certain he’s serious. We’ll tackle the signs he’s trying to trick you later in this article.
For now, check if he kissed you in any of these ways:
#11: Kissing You on the Lips
This is the most obvious and straightforward way of professing true love without words. He kisses you full on the mouth, and it leaves no doubt in your mind that it was a romantic kiss—not a merely friendly one.
Now, if he kissed you this way and you didn’t react badly, he’s probably waiting for a response from you. Do you like him enough to give him a shot? Or do you not trust him, and would rather turn him down? That’s up to you.
#12: Kissing the Top of Your Head
Is he taller than you, and he hugged you from behind and kissed the top of your head? If he did, take note that friends normally don’t do that. He obviously sees you as more than that, and if he hasn’t said so yet, he probably will soon.
#13: Kissing Your Shoulder
This type of kiss is normally only doable when you’re very close to each other, like when you’re hugging or cuddling. When he kisses you on your shoulder instead of your cheek or lips, it means he’s trying to get sensual with you. It’s an invitation for you to initiate the next kiss.
In case you didn’t return that kiss the first time, expect another attempt from him soon.
#14: Kissing on One of Your Lips
Did he just kiss you on one of your lips instead of both? If he did, does it still count as a sign he’s in love with you?
The answer is “Yes.” Think of it as the “lite” version of Kiss #11. He’s avoiding being too forward about his feelings, and he’s hoping you’d reciprocate.
If you’re concerned he’s showing a lack of confidence, you have a right to be. Perhaps it’s better to see if he becomes a bit more daring next time.
#15: Kissing Your Forehead
Ah, the forehead kiss. Quite possibly one of the most endearing kisses on this list. A guy usually does this to his girl when she’s feeling down, like a parent comforting a child. If he kissed your forehead and you suddenly felt safe, protected, and accepted—then he did it right.
Friends normally use words to make you feel better. This man just used his actions. And as actions speak louder than words, take it as a sign that he wants to be more than friends with you.
#16: Butterfly Kisses
Ever heard the song and wondered: “Wait, what are butterfly kisses?” Well, they’re lingering kisses, typically on the cheek, where the kisser bats their eyelashes to brush on the other person’s skin. You know, like fluttering butterfly wings.
And, yes, it’s a special sign of affection that’s normally reserved for more-than-friends situations. If he does it to you and no one else, it’s a sign your relationship is quite deep, and he’s ready to make things official if you are.
#17: The Slow Kiss
The slow kiss is Kiss #11, only much longer. It’s a lingering kiss that’s more respectful than sensual—think of the kisses you see in romantic comedies. With a slow kiss, he’s trying to show you he really does love you.
The question you should ask at this point is simple: Is it really love, or is he trying to trick his way into your bedroom? Later in this article, you’ll get some advice on how to find out his real agenda before it’s too late.
#18: The Upside-Down Kiss
This isn’t necessarily the “Spider-Man kiss,” although it could be. More likely you’re lying down on the same surface with him, but with your feet pointing in opposite directions. Your faces are next to each other, and he kisses your lips—upside down.
As you might imagine, upside-down kisses are quite rare. When they do happen, they’re fun, silly, unforgettable ways to find out a guy truly loves you.
#19: Kiss by Your Eye
Here’s another rare type of kiss that does happen—he kisses you beside your eye. It’s still considered a more private part of the face, one that only special people in your life have “kissing access” to.
How to Feel About These “Professing” Kisses
These kisses all tell you he’s probably truly in love with you and he’s willing to wait for sex. It’s the charming, old-fashioned, “true love waits” approach that may sound strange and out-of-place today.
What does it tell you about him? Three things:
- First, it might mean his heart’s in the right place. He’s probably a one-woman man, raised by religious or conservative parents. In other words, he’s the so-called “Beta Male”—not the most exciting chap out there, but definitely loyal, dedicated, and hardworking.
- Second, his use of professing kisses could also mean he’s inexperienced with women. Whether we like it or not, hookups are much more common than traditional dating in the modern dating scene. He may not know that and is naively using the only dating approach he knows.
- And third, it’s also possible he’s pretending. He may be a maniac dressed up like a choirboy. He’s trying to make you trust him enough to have sex with him, only to dump you after he gets bored. It’s sad, but you can’t rule out the possibility he’s really a creep.
Ultimately, it’s best to avoid jumping to conclusions about him. Instead, subject him to a simple test I call the “three-month rule.” It lets you date a guy, reveal his true colors, and keep yourself safe at the same time. I’ll explain it at the very end of this article.
For now, let’s talk about the kissing styles that tell you he wants sex.
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The Kissing Styles That Tell You He Wants You
He may or may not also want a proper long-term relationship with you, but fair warning: If he kisses you in any of the following 10 ways, chances are high he doesn’t.
#20: Octopus Kiss
Octopi have tentacles lined with suction cups, which give rise to the name of this kiss. The octopus kiss is a kiss on any part of the body that makes a rubbery pop sound. You might have been kissed this way by your aunt or grandmother when you were a kid.
Done by a guy, it gives you the feeling he’s getting too chummy. And that’s precisely the idea. He wants to let you know he wants to get real close to you.
#21: Passionate Kiss
This is Kiss #17 (the slow kiss), only much more passionate and sensual. The passionate kiss feels as though if you didn’t stop him, the interaction would have ended in sex.
And yes—for the passionate kiss, that’s pretty much the point. There are few clearer indications that he wants to get intimate with you.
#22: The French Kiss
The French kiss is one of the more popular “Let’s have sex” types of kisses. It’s a kiss where his tongue and yours do gymnastics with each other. It’s much deeper and more intimate than most kisses, and it leaves no doubt in your mind it’ll lead to sex.
#23: Sensual Kiss
If Kiss #21 (the passionate kiss) wasn’t sensual enough, this one is. Aside from the deep and torrid kissing, the sensual kiss also involves groping and fondling. When his hands start reaching for your privates, you know where things are going.
#24: The Neck Kiss
The neck is one of the most erogenous zones in the body. It’s almost impossible to get kissed there and not feel turned on. Guess what—that’s most likely his intent if he kisses you on the neck or nape.
He wants you to get aroused. Once you are, it’s a slippery slope to sex.
#25: Biting Your Lip
Another sign he wants to have sex with you: When he bites your lip during the kiss. It means he wants to get kinky with you. He’s probably testing if you’re into it, too.
#26: The Stomach Kiss
The stomach is another erogenous zone—get kissed there and get turned on. Even if he kissed you above clothing, he’s still “going where he shouldn’t go.” And when he takes off your top to give you a stomach kiss, you know where it’s going.
#27: The Ear Kiss
The ear is yet another highly erogenous zone. Some women are ticklish there, but others actually like their earlobes kissed or nibbled. Again, if he goes there, it means he’s testing to see if you’re game.
#28: Good Old Making Out
The term may be out of fashion, but “making out” means doing all kinds of kissing with a guy, including French and sensual kisses, while grinding on each other. Think of dry humping—you’re having sex, but with your clothes on, so there’s no penetration.
Making out is fun, and you might even get off on it. You can take it as a sign that he wants to “go there” with you, eventually.
#29: The Wrist Kiss
Lastly, and most people don’t know this, but the wrist is another erogenous zone in the body. (For other women, it’s not the wrist but the crook of the arm.) When he kisses you there, you can be sure he’s trying to turn you on.
How to Feel About These “Sexual” Kisses
Now, you might wonder: “Are you sure he’s only after sex? What if he wants sex and a serious relationship? Ever considered that possibility?”
Yes, it’s possible he wants both. I’m just saying don’t count on it. It bears repeating: In modern dating, hookups are the norm. Most men and women meet up, flirt, and have sex. Some end up becoming friends-with-benefits, while others try being exclusive. In both cases, though, the new relationship won’t even last a year.
Traditional dating—or “courtship,” if you will—is more the exception in today’s dating scene. And in such cases, a man almost never “breaches protocol” by using any of the 10 sexual kisses above. It sends the wrong message, and it lowers the relationship’s chances of lasting.
Again, the only way of telling for sure is to put him under the “three-month rule” test—which I’ll cover in the next section.
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What Can You Tell About a Guy By the Way He Kisses?
Let’s face it: Most people like kissing, and guys are no different. There’s something exciting about the feeling of being kissed by someone special to you. At once, you feel loved, accepted, and free to be who you are.
That said, it’s important to know precisely what he means with his kiss. This article covered 29 different kisses across four categories, sorted along whether he sees you as a friend, or he’s secretly or openly in love with you, or if he’s trying to manipulate you.
Understand that some men are deceptive. They can use kisses to supposedly show you love, enticing you to return the feeling and the gesture. And then, once they’ve had their way with you, they dump you like a hot potato. You know how it is.
Beware of Narcissists
This is especially true of narcissists. Yes, they enjoy kissing too. Except they don’t do it to show love or start a relationship with a woman. Instead, they do it to get something they want from her—whether it’s sex, leverage, a sense of dominance, and so on.
So what should you do? The first thing is to protect yourself. This is especially important if you’re an empath—that is, someone who’s naturally more sensitive to other people’s emotions. Empaths are the prime targets of narcissists.
So how can you protect yourself against narcissists and manipulators? I strongly suggest using the following strategy:
Use the “Three-Month Rule”
What’s the three-month rule? After you first kiss or date a man, wait for at least three months before having sex with him. That’s it. If you’re dating more than one guy at a time, or if you’re really serious about this one, you can push the time frame to six months.
*For some 3 months is way too long and for others, it is considered short. The idea behind it is to wait a bit before you take it to the next step and don’t rush things. For some it’s weeks, for others it’s months, most importantly is that you feel good about the next step.
Why the delay? Here’s the rationale:
Narcissists and manipulators tend to lose interest quickly. They’re normally just after the sex, only to stop seeing you once they get tired of sleeping with you. And yet if they invest time, money, and energy into you for one or two months and still not get what they want, they’ll give up.
You’ll know it when it happens. They go from sizzling hot and madly in love with you… to ice cold and almost nonexistent. They stop responding to your calls and texts, and if they do, they’re annoyed or dismissive.
Congratulations—you’ve revealed a trickster, and you saved yourself the heartache and frustration of sleeping with one.
Meanwhile, if he weren’t a trickster, and instead he was truly in love with you, then he wouldn’t mind the wait. He’ll stick with you, investing in your relationship, respecting you all the way.
That’s why the three-month rule is effective. It’s a simple, sustainable way to keep dating and keep yourself safe from the scummy ones out there.
Quick caveat, though: Don’t make him wait too long. Eventually, even a man in love with you will get tired of waiting. If you love him, make things official, and enjoy each other.
So go ahead—try it out and see for yourself. Happy kissing!
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