Hang on a minute! The narcissist doesn’t…doesn’t hate you?

No!

I am shocked to my core!

I thought they were full of love, hope, love, respect, and…

…Oh, who am I kidding.

Narcissists hate everybody, but they’re good at pretending to like.

If you’re past that point, and they can no longer hide their disdain, there will be good reasons.

What better time to tell you what they are than right now?

It’s Ain’t Hard To Be Hated!

The narcissist has two types of hate in their systems.

The first is outward. If they outwardly hate you, they will tell people, and that usually accompanies some kind of smear campaign, or justification for their disdain.

They wronged me!

They never paid me back!

They cheated!

They lied!

They were rude!

This will only be passed onto a select few people, but there will be outward hatred nonetheless.

The second is inward. To make it easy for you – this is everybody else. It’s true. Narcissists hate everybody, or at the very least, traits of everybody. 

I’ve even known narcissists to tear down innocent people they either know or don’t know – even family!

For example, narcissistic parents can hate their children.

Narcissistic siblings can hate the other.

Narcissists can hate  their so-called friends, too. 

There will always be a reason, and those reasons are exactly what I want to pass onto you today.

Your Confidence Drives Them Crazy

Firstly, let’s go there.

I did it. Don’t shoot me! I’m not telling you that your confidence is a negative part of your character. In fact, I bet it’s one of the best things about you.

Confident people get things done because they have the will and drive to pursue them. They try new things and brush off if they don’t quite work out. 

You like to meet new people and find it easy to talk to them. In job interviews, you draw in people and engage well. You make people laugh because you are a good storyteller. 

People like you.

Life goes your way.

You don’t let things get to you.

All because confidence is something you exude. 

Narcissists try to fake confidence – and yes – they win people over. But they know deep down that what they’re doing is shallow and false.

They are confidence frauds, and they know it.

What comes naturally to you, they have to work extra hard for.

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Your Success is Their Downfall: Envy Central!

Congratulations! You got the job!

Well done! You smashed that half marathon!

You must be over the moon! Your house has sold!

I’m so happy for you! You reached your target!

Oh but wait, what do you think you’re doing?

You can’t congratulate somebody in front of a narcissist. You can’t willingly hand another person the spotlight when it’s shining down on that toxic person over there!

Where success is due and given, narcissists will turn green with envy.

No Room for Two

Narcissists don’t want two people in the relationship. They want:

• To be the ones who have all the say
• To be in control of what goes on in the house
• The be in charge of all the finances and plans
• To know who you’re talking to, why and how often
• To make you invisible so they can look like the protectors and dominant spouse

Your job is to really just be there when they need supply. 

There isn’t room for two big characters in a narcissistic relationship; the bigger your character, the more they struggle.

Don’t get me wrong—you are likely to have a huge personality and loving nature. I am talking about overly loud, confident people who, in social settings, won’t get lost in the crowd (or indeed, wish they were lost). 

The narcissist wants you quiet, so you learn not to speak of your experiences or abuse. 

If you start doing so or using a louder-than-usual voice, prepare!

Growing? How Dare You!

When you plant a sunflower seed in a small pot, it will only grow so much. Eventually, you’ll need to transfer it to a bigger pot so it has room to expand.

If you don’t, it won’t.

Narcissists want to keep you in that small pot, even though you were never destined for it. 

If by chance, you decide to plant yourself in a bigger pot, the narcissist will hate you for it. The audacity of you deciding what your limitations are, rather than having them placed upon you will have the narcissist spitting feathers.

Ultimately though, you’re in charge of your life, right?

You’ve Exposed Them!

Look, I won’t pretend exposing the narcissist is going to be a good idea.

Expect pure hatred if you’re standing up and telling the world the truth.

You’re doing what they thought nobody would have the courage to do. Their threats, rage, and anger were not enough for you to back down and stay silent.

For that you should be proud, but don’t for one second think the narcissist is going to love you for letting the lid off the truth. 

You’re Shining Too Bright!

Wait a hot minute!

You are too much for the narcissist! 

You need to calm down.

Tone down.

Be smaller somehow.

Talk more quietly.

Don’t laugh so much.

Stop being so grateful or receptive to opportunity.

Leave your hopes and dreams at the door.

Stop exuding your talent or kindness. 

Turn your light off.

Your light is natural, and it doesn’t stop shining. Narcissists can’t fathom this, and instead see it as something that will outshine their own.

Narcissists want the brightest light, without failing to admit that the very light in question was stolen from other people in the first place. 

If you shine too brightly, people will be drawn to you instead of the narcissist.

They won’t have that!

Showing Them Their Insecurities: Ouch!

As it stands, narcissists will hate you if you so much as breathe an ounce of their insecurities their way. Imagine being this honest with them:

I know you don’t like it when I go out. Are you afraid that I’ll find somebody else?

You seem to be holding off on decorating the bathroom. I know you made a mistake with the painting last time. Are you afraid it’ll happen again?

Imagine not forgetting something about the narcissist like that. And instead of becoming frustrated by their control or delay, do you use them as opportunities to reflect their insecurity?

My goodness – it’ll be interesting to see their reaction, that’s for sure!

One thing I do know is that you will be witness to a little (or a lot) of hate coming your way!

8 Silly Mistakes Narcissists Make

Believe it or not, narcissists make mistakes every single day.

Just when you thought you believed the perfect image they portrayed, you’re starting to see through the cracks.

Oh, what fun that is!

Now, to see through those cracks, all you need is a little insight into what really happens when narcissists create huge errors for all to see.

And believe me, they can get very silly!

You Think They Are Perfect… So Do They!

When somebody presents you with this perfect image of themselves, it’s easy to believe it all the while those rose-tinted glasses are on. When you don’t see a fault, it won’t even cross your mind that they are less than the whole package. 

A narcissist will do this well because they don’t want you to see all the ways they’re actually as insecure as they are toxic. 

It’s like a show, right?

The show starts, and everybody takes a seat and watches the actors on stage. You don’t know what the actors are really like because you’re seeing them play a role; a character. 

It’s the same with all narcissists. They welcome you to your seat, and show you what you came to see. 

Eventually, that show is going to have to end. I mean, nobody can continuously act like that without their real character starting to come through.

The Horror!

It’s always a horror to the narcissist when they make a mistake. When something happens, you get to see the version of themselves that holds no color and no warmth. That’s when you realize what a facade it all is.

Catching them fail to be perfect means you have seen the real person behind the pretense. Furthermore, they are reminded in that single moment that they have faults.

8 Silly Mistakes Narcissists Make

Hey, don’t be surprised if you recognize your own situation in every single one of these points!

#1 They Are So Predictable!

The longer you get to know a narcissist, the more you can start to see patterns in their behavior.

You know at the family party, they’re going to turn up and cause some kind of discomfort. You learn to dread those gatherings, but more so, you find yourself preparing for them.

Psyching yourself up, or remembering all the times before they’ve passed comment or judgment, or made you the butt of jokes.

The way they can destroy an occasion is astounding – but they do it so frequently and similarly that you can now actually call them predictable.

#2 They Tell On Themselves

Oops, did the narcissist slip up? I think they may have! Narcissists only have to say one word or phrase for you to see or hear the slip up.

No, I’ve never spoken to them in my life.

Really? The same person I saw you with at the office last week?

I told you I didn’t want to go.

No. I have a text here from two weeks ago saying that you were looking forward to it.

Narcissists tell on themselves all the time, if you let them just fall into their own traps. Making it easy for them to do so gives you far more ammunition when it comes to fighting your half of the conflict. 

Narcissists only think they’re clever, but if you scratch beneath the surface, you’ll see them make mistake after mistake.

It’s hilarious!

#3 Confession Time!

A narcissist will tell you everything about themselves the second they start projecting onto you.

You’re so narcissistic! Stop trying to control everything!

Nobody likes you! You’re not worth their time.

You are so frustrating. I wish you’d learn to love yourself more!

When you are stuck in the midst of these kinds of comments, it’s hard to really understand them to be any other way than pure insults.

Once you learn about projection, you learn that narcissists use it to put everything they feel about themselves onto you so they don’t have to deal with it themselves.

This constant denial is hurtful at the time, because it seems as though you can’t do a thing right.

In actual fact – the mistake is the narcissist assuming you’re anywhere near as toxic as they are. 

#4 No Reason Anger

Shout, shout, shout.

Rah, rah, rah.

Noise, noise, noise.  

What’s it all for? Give me one good reason?

The narcissist can’t.

It’s anger for absolutely no reason, but it’s aimed at you to make you feel like you need to say sorry.

For what?

You didn’t do anything wrong.

When the narcissist becomes angry for no reason, they make the silly mistake of trying to lure people into the drama. 

Some will fall for it, yes. Once you start awakening to narcissist abuse, you will probably find yourself walking away and shaking your head.

Because it’s just not worth it. 

#5 They Underestimate You

Underestimating you is a huge mistake. Imagine thinking that you can’t do a fraction of the things you’re actually able to do – with ease!

Not only that, but this is also about character.

When a person wants to break you, they can take you to hell and back trying. If you remain steadfast in your response and do not let it get to you, you will end up being severely underestimated.

#6 They Don’t Commit To The Change They Promise

This is when you start to see the narcissist for who they really are.

Those promises made that are continuously broken will form a pattern for you. And no, it doesn’t work out the way you hope because that happens when hope fades to disappointment. 

You want somebody to commit to you, and love you for who you are. And all the ways they say they will be there for you to be true and followed through with.

You soon learn to not trust them, even though they are yearning for you to be faithful and stick by their side.

It’s too late when you open your eyes and see the narcissist, not the charmer!

#7 Believing They’re Perfect

This one almost makes me cringe.

Narcissists all believe they’re perfect. 

They adore themselves on the surface, and convince themselves that they have no flaws at all. 

That’s a lot to uphold, don’t you think? Especially when the mask can slip so easily…

#8 Believing What They Say is True

A narcissist’s voice is their favorite song. I’ll go one deeper than that:

A narcissist’s voice is their favorite ever sound. 

Nothing beats it.

They’re always right and believe anything they say is true. 

Nobody can convince them otherwise, and if you so much as question, then more fool you.

Well, actually, more fool them…

…One day they will be proven wrong, which will be their most embarrassing moment to date!