If I ask you if you’ve ever wanted to piss off a narcissist, would you laugh at me?
It seems like such an obvious question with only one answer – of course you have!
I know the first thing you might want to do is be obvious and fast in how you piss them off, but trust me, you can do it in a way that is so easy.
It’s something you can do today, and the more you learn how to, the better you will get at it.
Tempted to read more and find out how to really piss them off?
Welcome! Pull up a chair.
#1 First things first – stop reacting
I am jumping right into this because there is so much I want to advise you on!
Let’s start here:
You are in a relationship with the narcissist, and have been for five years.
You know the biggest way to lead yourself to an argument or conflict with them comes only after you react.
They can be yelling at you, goading you, or laying down little verbal traps for you to walk into that they know will get you heated up.
They know that because it’s a tried and tested model that’s worked for them thus far.
The first step to pissing off the narcissist in question is simple:
You stop reacting.
I appreciate how difficult this might be in theory, and even in practice initially, but at some point, you have to challenge yourself if you want real results.
#2 Learning what your reactions do to the narcissist
Well, I don’t think you need me to tell you that so far in your relationship, you’ve supplied the narcissist with many reactions, and none of them have done you any good emotionally, mentally or physically.
It’s not your fault at all that this is the case. The narcissist lays various traps down for you to walk into, and you do so because you are cornered and tested to your utmost limits.
The narcissist then steps back and glares at you.
“Do I even know this person?” they ask. “You are so snappy.”
Of course you are. That’s because you were pushed to react, and you did.
That gives the narcissist the power to dictate that you are unreasonable, you are unstable, and you are the reason why the relationship is so volatile.
#3 You say no – and mean it
It’s time to change it all up now, and give the narcissist nothing. I know it may seem a little challenging initially, after all, you have to undo a lot of learning and habits that got you to this point, and that can be a struggle in itself.
It’s time though, to say no. If you really want to piss off the narcissist, saying no to reacting to them is the first step in watching the color drain from their face.
When they goad you, you leave the room. When they tap into your triggers and wait for you to react, you shrug and get on with something else. When they wait for you to snap, you remain intact and dignified.
It really can be a reality for you if you work on it, and I know that in turn, this will ignite a fire in you to keep going, rather than revert back into your old ways.
Remember, you aren’t doing this for them, you are doing it for you.
#4 Don’t chase their approval
Many victims love to chase the approval of the narcissist.
It’s not because they want to do it out of their own ego or issues, it’s because they know that the chase may give way to a positive outcome for the victim.
Outcomes like that may be a thank you, or a smile, or a hug, or time together, or simply just being in a room with them in a good mood.
But there’s a flip side to this ideology, and that is this:
Those moments rarely come, if at all. If they do, they don’t last longer than the shortest time possible.
You chase those moments because they are so rare, and because they feel so good when they occur.
And so, you stop. You stop giving them anything they want, or moving heaven and earth to make them happy.
Even how you react will amek them happy, despite the fact that they seemingly respond with a frown or a shame-ridden look on their face.
Naricssists will love your emotional outbursts becauae they know they’ve pushed and controlled the narrative enough to make the outcome be what it is.
It’s a deep leve of satisfaction for them when they can clearly see how little it takes to get you to burst, and it reminds them of their power.
This is something you can take away, and I firmly recommend doing it to piss them off.
#5 Be happy without them
When you can learn not to react to the narcissist, you can learn to finally be happy without them.
It proves that you don’t need to rely on their persuasive yet toxic attempts to dictate how you feel.
You get to live your life with your emotions intact, and there’s nothing they can say or do to push you into feeling anything you don’t want to feel.
Being happy without needing the narcissist shows that you have a strength within you that holds you back from drama and conflict.
The narcissist will not know what has happened, but they will realize they can’t control you any more.
That’s what all of this boils down to:
Control.
Without it, you will piss them off big time, but that’s not a bad thing, because a happy narcissist usually means they have a compliant victim.
We all know that you are past the days of compliance, and are now looking ahead to being a much stronger version of yourself than ever before.
#6 Live your life like they don’t get a say
That’s how it should always be, don’t you think? Living life your way is how the narcissist is refused any say in what you do.
It’s how you gain control of your emotions, regulate them in a way that you deem to be suitable for your lifestyle, and not budge when anybody comes along trying to wreck any of it.
- Don’t fall for their ploys.
- Leave yourself time to answer them before you do, so you can choose how to react.
- Remind yourself how capable you are.
- Think about how you want to feel, and live by the premise that you will not be forced any other emotion upon you.
You’re not giving them special treatment any more, in fact, you’re treating them just like everybody else.
I think that’s one way to officially receive your, “I am pissed off with you” certificate from the narcissist, don’t you?
And you know, it may take time to discover the fact that the narcissist doesn’t need a say in what you do or how you act.
Let me assure you though; life will be so much better when you are able to control your own narrative for once.
