This is How The Narcissist Reacts When You Stop Being Their Puppet

When I was a kid, I loved making sock puppets and putting on voices to get them to say or do funny things.

When I think about it, the world really was my oyster for that. They were puppets, and what I said, became the show.

When you’re involved with a narcissist, you become a part of their show. They pull the strings, and you do as you’re told. 

It’s a nightmare for you … Until you stop. 

Then it becomes a nightmare for them.

Here’s how.

Losing their grip… just wait

When a narcissist loses their grip, it can look like watching a child lose their favorite toy.

This is the kind of grip that has held you for so long, and I don’t want you to underestimate how much of a negative impact that will have had on your life. 

The grip that prevents you. The grip that controls you. The grip that tells you that you can’t do something. The grip that asks for total obedience. 

When they lose that, they lose everything. Having the ability to control you from the palm of their hands means they’ve got you right where they want you, and it is painful for them to see that be taken.

You don’t want to be their puppet any longer. It’s time to take action. 

#1 They panic

Wait, you’re not doing what I want you to do any more?

That’s what all of this comes down to. The first thing they will do when you defy them and pull away is question you.

Pointing the finger like this proves they will do anything to not make it about them. They can’t possibly be the reason!

We all know, they are the reason. 

The fake tears? Oh sure, they can come. The fear will present in so many different types of ways that it may even take you by surprise.

Narcissists want it to be staged so that their panic looks like confusion.

What’s wrong?

Why aren’t you playing my game?

When really, they want to know what caused the shift. What was the catalyst? What was your breaking point? Where did it all start to go wrong?

#2 They play the victim (boo hoo)

You’re just so mean. 

I did everything for you.

How can you be so mean?

Let’s translate that…

“I’ve got to make it look like you’re the problem before anybody else suspects that I have treated you wrongly in some way.

It’s kind of funny to notice this about narcissists, because playing the victim really is like watching somebody flip a switch.

Before you know it, this controlling, aggressive, toxic person is weeping to anybody willing to listen. 

Their tears hide numerous fears, but their speciality is converting those fears into tears. 

Playing the victim works because it induces guilt and shame into the victim, who almost always ends up apologizing for something they haven’t done and runs back to them, reverting back to the same dynamics as before.

#3 They talk trash about you

The whole narrative goes from controlling you, to controlling how others see you.

If you defy them and stop being the puppet they’re so used to controlling, you will land yourself in a heap of gossip, with you at the center of it all. 

The trash they will talk about you will not stop, and the narcissist will chat it to anybody who wants to listen. 

You’re terrible.

You’re trouble.

You are a liar.

You hate the narcissist. 

You are abusive.

You are impatient.

You are unkind.

You don’t care.

You didn’t want to work on the relationship.

Whatever they can think of, they will throw at you hard and fast. 

I always like to say; let them talk. 

The truth should never need defending, as much as you might want to scream from the rooftops.

And I know how hard it can be to bite your tongue, but the best revenge really is your own success. 

So go get it. 

#4 They try that final, toxic trap

They never wanted a partner, they wanted a puppet. That’s what you have to remember when they try to lure you in one final time. 

Are you going to fall for the nice person act? How many times has that worked in the past, and you’ve found yourself right back where you started?

Narcissists are very good at seeming like they are brand new and shiny, but I think if you fall for it, you fall into old patterns of both acting and thinking. 

As delusional as they are, narcissists assume that whatever has previously worked, will continue to do so with you. That’s how predictable you have become to them. 

Give them every right to try, but decline their offer to keep you in their lives every single time.

#5 They replace you … fast

Would you call that love? Because I definitely wouldn’t. The narcissist is moving on, and leaving you behind.

That’s probably going to stir some strange feelings up inside you, but I say let it.

It’s normal to feel mixed emotions when you walk away from somebody you thought you’d have a happy ending with, and it doesn’t matter if they are your abuser or not. 

The addictiveness of the cycle of abuse you’d have shared with the narcissist will take some time to get used to not sitting in. But remember this:

Narcissists don’t move on, they just find a new supply. It’s not a case of moving on, that’s only reserved for people who have the ability to harbor actual feelings, rather than retreat everybody like some kind of game. 

But it goes to show, right? You were never the problem. You were just the latest in a long string of people they want to suck the life out of. 

The reason they replace you so quickly is because they can barely live a day on their own without anybody to make miserable and to trigger.

If you’re showing signs of leaving or proving that you don’t need them in your life any more, what happens is the narcissist will see that they just cannot grip tightly to you any longer.

As far as they’re concerned, what’s the point in trying? You’ve proven that you aren’t to be messed with, and they have to deal with it the best way they know how. 

That is where they become desperate, where anybody willing to people please will be good enough for them. 

Your best life is where it’s at

The only way you can find and live your best life is by refusing to be the narcissist’s puppet a second longer.

Cutting the string and being able to move and live independently of the narcissist’s control is where you will pretty much realize just how limited you’ve been in the past. 

It can take a while to believe that a ‘best life’ is possible, especially when you’ve had little to no say in how your life goes with the narcissist.

But, like I always say, life is for living, and you owe it to yourself.

It’s your time!