Things Narcissists do When They’re Jealous of You

Oh my God, what is that hideous creature before me??!

Oh, okay. It’s just the narcissist morphing into the green-eyed monster yet again.

I say yet again with such disdain because it happens all the time, doesn’t it? All you want is a day of peace, and here they are again, reminding you what they don’t have.

You want them to be grateful, but the narcissist hungrily and greedily wants more and more – like it’s their right.

So, do you think you can spot all the things the narcissist will do when they’re jealous of you?

These are worth knowing!

Tarnish Your Good Reputation

Everyone loves you?

Ruin it.

You’re known as a person who is kind, giving and compassionate?

Must destroy.

People always bring up good memories of you.

Time to change that!

Narcissists aren’t going to sit and listen to everybody else talk about how wonderful you are. All the good things you do, the beauty you bring into the world…

Forget it!

Narcissists want all the attention for themselves. Why is nobody discussing them? Why are they slowly sinking into the background? They weren’t meant to be wallflowers!

The jealousy of a narcissist is like a really oxygen-sucking engine revving, ready for action. 

If you suddenly start hearing negative rumors about you, it’s time you realized who invented them, and why!

Spread False Rumors

False rumors can be very precise.

You cheated on an ex boyfriend.

You aren’t actually as nice as people think you are.

You faked your way into your current job.

Anything and everything that could possibly tear you down or make you seem less able or ‘nice’ will be a trick the narcissist pulls, ready to use and make them look better.

Worryingly, they can accompany their news with that terrible concern for you. Are you okay? Is something else going on? Maybe they’re going through a tough time…

False rumors make you look bad and the narcissist look good. That’s all they’re ultimately interested in.

It’s a really manipulative tool to rip you from the top of your game to the bottom, and catapult them higher within theirs. 

The ‘One-Up’ on You

Anything you can do, the narcissist can do better.

Anything you’re planning on doing, the narcissist is already done (and they probably found it boring.)

Any car you have, they have the latest version.

If you’re moving to a bigger house, they plan to look for somewhere even larger.

If you are going on that all-inclusive vacation, they’ve been there and done that twice already this year.

And hey – believe me when I say this…

Narcissist can even be as sick as this…

If you are unwell, have a bad back, or feel like your mental health is tanking – they are going to have something far worse.

This can get as bad as a narcissist faking an illness and going to the doctors to get themselves checked out. They can wave medical letters in your face and tell you they need a scan or blood test.

They’re not jealous of your illness – they’re jealous of the attention you’re getting from having it. 

The Social Media Shame and Humiliation

Having a nice time wherever you are?

Like your new haircut, do you?

Finally reached a weight loss target?

People telling you how brilliant you’ve done or how well you look?

People congratulating you for your achievements?

Well…. Brace yourself….

The narcissist is incoming….

Look for signs on social media where they tease you for your good news. Look for comments such as:

You didn’t get a first degree though, did you?

Did you mean not to lose that much weight on your legs?

So, all those weight loss pills finally worked!

Your new hair makes you look like Peter Pan!

Or just a simple ‘laugh response’ on a photo or post will be enough to do it.

Anything they can do on social media that draws a smile from your face, they will.

Any comment they can make that knocks you off your happy perch, they will make it.

A person can get 50 positive remarks, and only focus on the one negative remark they receive amongst them.

It’s tragic, but it’s how the brain is conditioned. We remember the bad stuff so our brains can try to protect us from more of it.

Triangulation

If a narcissist sees you getting on well with somebody they might want to spark a relationship or friendship with, they will cut between you like a sharp knife going through a loaf of bread.

They triangulate by making you look bad to the other person. They won’t stop at lies and deceitful things just to get them to view you differently and back off. 

This creates a pseudo-trust between the person and the narcissist—the perfect foundation for a new ‘ship’ of sorts. 

You’ll feel completely confused about what changed so quickly and why.

In a nutshell – the narcissist was jealous. Nothing more or less to it, sadly.

Discard You

If you’re doing too well, you can’t be around them making them look bad.

It can be as easy for the narcissist just to drop you like a hot potato if they don’t like the person and light you are.

Narcissists are not the kind of people who feel good around successful or loving people who get a lot of attention or luck come their way. They instead think, “What makes you feel you’re so good?” 

They honestly see your success as an innate flaw.

It’s troubling isn’t it?

This is narcissists all over though. Say the right words to the wrong person, and you’re as good as yesterday’s news. 

Projection – “You’re the Jealous One!”

If you were to dare accuse a narcissist of being jeaou – be prepared.

Take cover if you can!

A narcissist is going to throw everything they’ve got at you.

You’re the jealous one!

Who would be jealous of you? You’re barely competent!

It’ll come back to you, and turn you into the one who:

Feels guilty for upsetting them.

Feels guilty for having something good happen.

Knows not to accuse the narcissist of being jealous again. 

Of course a narcissist will do this – they don’t want to be found out. They don’t want to look weak or pathetic, so they make you look that way instead.

Zone into Your Weaknesses

This can be done in very covert ways, but it will break you all the same.

If you have something good going on in your life that invokes a jealous response from the narcissist – they will ruin it.

They can and will take your insecurities and shine a bright light on them.

Don’t feel confident in beachwear? They will book a surprise beach getaway.

Hate public speaking? They will take you somewhere where you’ll have to speak in front of everybody else.

On a bit of a health kick and are watching what you eat? They will book a ‘romantic’ meal for the both of you at the all-you-can-eat. 

They will do these things in ways where they act like they care and have your best interests.

I was just trying to do something nice!

No—you were trying to ruin something good I’ve got going on because you’re jealous that you aren’t making things happen for yourself. 

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