Are you looking? I mean, are you really looking?
It’s funny really. When you look close enough at a narcissist, you will spot everything you need to know about them.
What makes them tick, the games they play. The poison they spill out into the world.
Even the strange hobbies they enjoy when they think you aren’t looking.
So let’s talk about that today. Let’s uncover their weirdness, and prove just how crazy and weird they can get.
Hobby alert!
I love it when people lean into their hobbies. When you find something you love to do, whether that’s crafting, creating, exercising, socializing or baking; hobbies are such a nice pastime, and they make up who we are.
What I want you to think about is why we have them. Why do we pick them? It’s because we find joy in certain things, and those things can differ depending on who we are.
Some people might hate working out, but others may love to go running.
Some might love writing, others making jam. It doesn’t matter what it is, as long as you love it.
The bottom line with hobbies is this:
You feel good doing it, even if you’re just starting out.
Narcissists don’t usually have hobbies that they admit to loving so much, it’s more that they enjoy the weirdest things when nobody is watching.
So, what do I mean by that? I’m glad you asked…
Hobbie #1 Recording other people
With or without their consent, although the likelihood is, probably without.
Narcissists have been known to do this in crowded situations, if somebody funny or hot catches their eye, or if they simply want to mock somebody on social media later on.
It’s weird how they assume we all want to see it. Sometimes what they record doesn’t even get shared, it just stays on their phone forever for them to rewatch.
I don’t know what possesses them to do this, I just think they feel so entitled to record what’s going on around them that they forget it’s a total invasion of privacy.
But then again, we are talking about narcissists here. For them, boundaries don’t exist.
Hobbie #2 Obsessing over their social media
They don’t stop obsessing over social media for the simple reason being that it’s the only place they can carve out their image to perfection for all to see.
These are mass audiences, and every narcissist knows their virtual world is watching every post they make.
None can be imperfect. None can appear to be anything other than boosting their reputation.
So when you aren’t looking, they’re trying to filter that perfect selfie, consider the perfect status update, or if they’re out and about, every photo they take they know will end up online. Therefore each frame has to make a difference and stand out.
Once the posts are uploaded, it doesn’t end there. Narcissists return back to them time and time again, waiting for comments or likes that will give them an ego boost immediately.
For them, it’s how they keep their image alive when they aren’t able to do so in person.
I do find it troubling, I mean, we all love our little social media lives, but we know it’s fun and we dip in and out.
For narcissists, it’s their lifeline. It’s how they want people to know and remember them.
And if I can be brutally honest, it’s one of their strangest hobbies.
Hobbie #3 Staring in the mirror
Mirror, mirror on the wall
Who has the biggest ego of all…
Ten points if you said the narcissist!
They love a mirror. Have you noticed something really interesting about all that time they spend starting in one, though?
It’s fascinating to see that they never really look at themselves in the eye. Instead, they go to every other part of their body.
How do my arms look?
How do my clothes fit on me?
Have I lost weight?
How’s my hair?
Do I have a good color make-up on?
My muscles, are they more refined?
Everything is put into question, but if they are given an opportunity to give themselves a little eye-contact, it’s actually far more difficult than you think.
They can’t do it.
That doesn’t mean they don’t love to stare as often as they can. They need every ounce of confidence they can get!
Hobbie #4 Constantly looking for ways to stand out
And trust me when I say: narcissists will do anything to stand out, except look bad.
You will find them getting that drastic haircut. Perhaps they will get the newest car out of all their family and friends, and update it regularly so it stays new.
If everybody is going to Spain for their summer vacation, you’ll find them in Mexico.
It is tiresome to think about just how desperate they are to stand out, but the reason they like to is to be different from the masses.
Turning heads is their favorite way of getting noticed, and the need to do so is pretty constant. I’m talking; they will lay in bed at night conjuring up the next way the whole world’s eyes can gravitate their way.
Heaven forbid they are just the same as you and I, right? I mean, what’s so terrible about that? It’s because a narcissist fears normality.
They can’t cope with the idea that they are in the same league as everybody else. They have to be doing something special with their lives, they have to be buying something so expensive it will turn heads.
If it means they get to sit apart from everybody else, the narcissist will fight and work to be that person. Don’t you think it’s sad? I really do.
Hobbie #5 Playing mind games
Mind games and narcissists go hand in hand, and you cannot have one without the other.
When I talk about mind games, I am talking about:
- The way narcissists blow hot and cold with you
- How they make you feel like you have to walk on eggshells around them
- How they create drama and then pretend it had nothing to do with them
- How they get in your mind and convince you that your own family or friends don’t like you any more
- The way they refuse to allow you to enjoy any good thing in life, then complain to you that you never seem happy
- The way they convince you that your reality isn’t real
- How they tell you what to do, where to go, where to work, how to act, or what a terrible partner you are, when all you do is your best to please them
Mind games are constant, and they will not just be in one area of your life, either.
Like poison, these games will seep into every part of what you do, and the fact that narcissists enjoy treating people this way is incredibly creepy and disturbing.
This is not subjective, this is fact.
Narcissists are so strange. They will never be able to live happy, normal lives because of how much they hate normality, and how much they hate happiness.
