Q: If a narcissist has discredited a family member, in other words, told untrue things about a family member to a relative, what is the best way to handle the situation? The relative, who lives in another part of the country, does not know either people well (visits once a year), and has not seen the negative aspects of the narcissist. I believe he would be confused as to who to believe.
A: If the relative only visits once a year, what are the chances of him finding out that the narcissist said hurtful things about him? I would not make a point of letting the visitor know unless there is some legal ramification or some dire reason for that person to know. You can try to clearly state (privately) to the narcissist that you don’t want to hear hurtful accusations about family members and to please refrain from that in your presence. The narcissist may or may not oblige with your request; do not try to “force” the truth out of him or her. You will not be successful. They must save face at all costs.
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