Everybody duck! The finger of blame is being launched toward you yet again!
By now you should have learned to avoid holding onto words of accusation the narcissist goes nuclear on.
They usually come from a place that’s far from the truth, but victims everywhere are still assuming those words hold truth.
They don’t.
In fact, instead of being the truth, they’re in fact a confession of the narcissist themselves.
Want to know more? Read these 9 things narcissists accuse you of that double up as confessions.
#1 You’re the narcissist
Do you ever believe a narcissist when they point the finger at you and tell you that you’re actually the narcissist?
Do you stop what you’re doing and think, “Oh my God, they’re right. I am such a terrible person.
I am always creating drama, and playing games with people. My ego is off the charts.
I ruin people’s spirits for fun, and I hate the attention being on anybody else even for a second.”
Sound like you? Narcissists are so full of it that they won’t just tell you this, they will have you also believe it to be true.
They could convince you that the sky is purple and eventually, you’d believe it.
Listen out for this line because when you hear it, you know they’re panicking.
They’re throwing it on you because they can, and because they know you’ll buy it.
#2 You love the drama
There are two types of people in this world. Those who love drama, and those who avoid it like the plague.
I always think, “Why would anybody knowingly want to throw themselves into the fire pit when they know how dangerous it can be?” Drama is that.
It’s the worst kind of dangerous, because it involves seeing people upset, angry or witnessing conflict live in action.
There’s always at least one person who walks away scathed by drama, and usually it’s those who don’t deserve it at all.
So why would you want to be a part of it? We should all really be living as quiet a life as possible, getting on with your errands and goals, and supporting the people you love.
If you’re told you love drama, you’ll think all those times they cornered you and got your reactions in the heat of the moment you enjoyed.
You’ll be programmed to think you’re the cause, rather than the receiver.
You’re not the problem, and you never were.
#3 You hate yourself
People with a frighteningly low level of self-esteem and self-confidence are far more likely to hate themselves, but these are parts of you that you can control.
The reason these parts of your character are slipping away is down to the narcissist’s behavior toward you.
The things they say, the way they treat you. It all has this strange effect on you, and you start to absorb it as the truth.
This is a real reflection of how the narcissist feels about themselves. Their self-hatred is on a scale you could never imagine, to the point where they spend their entire lives trying to earn praise from everybody they encounter.
They want to be the best, the fittest, the thinnest, the most skilled, the richest; whatever it is that sets them apart from the rest.
If they can project that onto you, they absolutely will. So when you learn to hate yourself, the hate the narcissist has for themselves can be buried under the guise.
In learning that you have no reason to hate yourself, you can start to grow away from the narrative spun on you, for you.
Start shining the light on why you’re assumed to carry all that hate for you, when in fact, the narcissist is the one who is weighed down by the real and strong belief that it’s them who is understanding of self-love.
Only then will you uncover the truth!
#4 Fear rules you
What? Fear never seemed to be a problem until they came along, yet you’re the one who is accused?
Narcissists are scared more than you will ever be aware of, yet you’ll never be privy to this admittance.
Instead, the fear will be piled into you through the sneakiest of ways. A critical comment, the doubt in your abilities, the negative assumptions that you would never be able to do anything you want to do.
Suddenly, like a child, you retreat from the world instead of absorbing it.
Listen out when a narcissist tells you that you’re so full of fear. These are signs that very person is passing over their fears to you to hold the weight of, so they don’t have to.
#5 You aren’t good at expressing yourself
I’d bet money that you’re good at expressing yourself.
The problem lies with being around a narcissist, who insists on talking for you, talking down at you, or denying you of even having the most basic levels of self-expression that a person needs to keep their identity intact.
I’ll let you into a secret. Narcissists are shocking at expressing themselves unless they want to express anger.
They don’t want to appear soft or vulnerable, and they certainly don’t have the words to string together to explain what they’re honestly thinking or feeling.
#6 You don’t have any true friends
You do, they were likely pushed away by the narcissist and now you don’t have them around.
Or, you do and they’re still in your circle but the narcissist wants you to think they aren’t real friends, so you isolate yourself from them.
Either way, it’s the narcissist who doesn’t have proper buddies. That would involve being able to seek joy, relish in true connections, and allow themselves to open up and trust in others, and also be trusted in return.
Never going to happen!
#7 Being too opinionated
Oh, this is a fun one to hear! You’re too opinionated. Coming from the person who knows everybody else’s business and will offer their ‘thoughts’ on them on a daily basis? The person who criticizes you the moment you try to do anything?
Come off it!
You should know by now that opinions come from us all, but those who are too much will often be the ones accusing others of that very trait.
We don’t buy it!
#8 Being intolerant of others
I think the fact that you’ve tolerated this narcissist for a s long as you have will completely debunk this accusation, what do you think? Am I right?
If you could put a little label on the narcissist and accuse them of this, it’d really suit them.
Put a little bow on it too, while you’re there. Try to make them look a little cute.
#9 Always wanting your own way
Ha! Listen, if you are with a narcissist and you always want your own way, this relationship would not last the duration of a Beatles song!
One of you has to give everything up in order for the other to be satisfied, and that person will never be the narcissist.
What an accusation to make though, right?
You can hold the mirror up and show them their own reflection if you want. I won’t judge!
