20 Sure Signs a Married Man Wants To Sleep With You

Last Updated on February 8, 2022 by Alexander Burgemeester

So, you’ve met a really nice guy and you’ve got great chemistry, the only problem is he’s married! You want to take things further, but you’re not sure how to move forward because he’s not giving much away.

The problem is that married men have a lot to lose, so they’re not going to lay all their cards down on the table immediately and it might take a while to figure out where you stand with them.

The good news is that even though he’s not being clear about his intentions, he’ll give you plenty of obvious signs to let you know he wants to sleep with you. Here are 20 signs a married man wants to sleep with you. 

How do You Know if a Married Man is Attracted to You Sexually?

How do You Know if a Married Man is Attracted to You Sexually?

Just because a man is married doesn’t mean he will stop being sexually attracted to other women. Additionally, he might be having problems in his marriage that are driving him into the arms of someone else.

You’ll know if a married man is sexually attracted to you because his body language will give the game away. He might not come out and say it, but you’ll see it.

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The next time you’re having a conversation with him, make eye contact with him and look deeply into his eyes, if his pupils are dilated, he’s definitely attracted to you.

Men tend to stare at the women they find beautiful. So if you happen to look up and catch him staring at you, he’s probably looking at you thinking, “WOW!” she’s stunning.” 

20 Signs a Married Man Wants to Sleep With You

In most cases, when a man finds a woman attractive, he wants to sleep with her. You will also find there are many things about a woman that turns him on other than physical attraction.

In case you’re not sure, here are 20 pretty obvious signs a married man wants to sleep with you:

20 Signs a Married Man Wants to Sleep With You

He Wants to Know if You’re in a Relationship

This is a strange one considering the fact that he’s married. But most men want a drama-free life, so the last thing he needs is to hit on someone else’s woman and end up getting jumped in the parking lot!

So, whether directly or indirectly, he’ll find a way to ask about your dating life and whether you’re in a relationship. For example, he might say something like, “now I’m sure a fine young lady like you isn’t single.” 

He Tells You What He’s Not Getting From His Wife

If you’ve known him for some time, during conversation, he might confide in you about his marital issues. Maybe his wife has just given birth, and now she’s lost her sex drive and they rarely sleep together anymore.

This is his way of letting you know that he’s not getting enough sex, he needs more, and maybe you can help him out. 

He Sits or Stands With His Legs Apart

When a man sits or stands with his legs apart, he’s thinking about getting in your knickers, states human behavior expert Vanessa Van Edwards. She says when men want to be seen as protective and attractive, they’ll spread their legs or drape their arms over the chair they’re sitting on. 

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He Stands With His Hands on His Hips

When a person stands with their hands on their hips, it’s known as the superman pose. It’s a territorial display and a way of saying,” I’m ready for action.” In this case, the kind of action he’s ready for is in between the sheets with you! 

He Will Charm You With His Humor

Most women don’t just sleep with a man because he’s hot; there’s got to be something more. Since women love funny men, you may find that he starts charming you with his humor.

First, he’ll want to make you laugh and show you that he’s easy-going, light-hearted, fun to be around, and witty. Then, to continue the conversation and keep making you laugh when he’s not with you, he’ll send you funny memes and jokes. 

He Will Be Intrigued by You

Since you’re a strong, confident woman who’s comfortable in her own skin, married men will be intrigued by you. During the conversation, you will notice that he will highlight aspects of your personality or things you’ve accomplished and talk about how he admires them. 

He Thinks Before He Speaks

When you ask him questions, do you notice that he doesn’t just blurt out his answers but that he thinks them through? Short, lazy responses are an indication that he’s not interested in you enough to give you a decent answer. Basically, he doesn’t care what you think.

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On the other hand, a man who’s on a mission to get you to like him will give you a carefully thought-out answer, even if you ask him a simple question.

It also shows that on some level, he respects you because he’s put effort into constructing a thoughtful answer that he hopes will impress you. 

He Gives You Gifts and Pays For You

Look, the bottom line is that adult relationships are transactional, especially for the pursuer. You can’t expect to get if you’re not willing to give.

No, you’re not a glorified hooker; it’s the way of the world. He also wants you to like him too, and that’s what men do when they’re trying to woo a woman.

You’ll find that if you work together, and you go on lunch, he’ll buy it, he’ll pay for your parking, or bring you coffee in the morning. If he really wants to impress you, he’ll buy you gifts like perfume, jewelry, clothes or shoes. 

He Loves Your Sense of Humor and Sarcasm

Do you have a sarcastic, juvenile, raw, or geeky sense of humor? Some men find this extremely attractive not only because it makes them laugh but also because it challenges them.

Sometimes you speak in riddles, and it takes brainpower on his behalf to figure out what you’re trying to say. You’ll probably notice that he’ll start using some of your phrases, which indicates that he liked what you said so much, so he decided to adopt it.

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Humorous and sarcastic people make you funnier by osmosis, and who doesn’t want more humor in their life? 

He Licks His Lips

Both men and women lick their lips when they think something like food looks tasty. So, when a man licks his lips around you, it’s because he’s sexually attracted to you. It’s even been scientifically proven that men salivate when they’re attracted to a beautiful woman.

A study conducted by the University of Chicago found that when men were exposed to images of attractive women, the hormonal reaction of excess testosterone made their mouths water. 

He Wants to be Closer to You

Whether you’re sitting or standing during conversation, he’ll try and get as close to you as possible. This is a natural human reaction, when we’re around people we like, we gravitate towards them.

During conversation, he’ll move closer, claiming he can’t hear you, or, if he’s brave enough, every so often, he’ll whisper in your ear. 

He Compliments Your Physical Appearance

An obvious sign when a married man is flirting with you is when he compliments a woman’s physical appearance, it’s because he’s being flirtatious, he wants her to know he finds her attractive. He might say something like, “you’ve got beautiful eyes,” or “you’ve got such a pretty smile.”

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If he’s not trying to hold anything back and he wants to get straight to the point, he might say, “I’m a legs guy, and I could look at yours all day.” 

He Loves Your Positive Attitude

Whether a guy is planning on hitting it and quitting it or not is irrelevant, no man wants to sleep with a miserable witch! On the other hand, a woman with a positive attitude is magnetic because they make other people feel good.

He’s noticed how friendly you are, that you always smile at random people, give them compliments, and strike up conversations with strangers.

You’re the kind of person who is always making someone’s day a little easier, and your guy friend notices this and appreciates it. 

His Voice Deepens When He Speaks to You

Since women like masculine men, men assume the more masculine they act, the more attracted a woman will be to them. So when he’s around you, he might add some base to his voice and start sounding like Barry White to get your attention. 

He Likes Your Smell

If you’re wearing perfume, and he likes the smell, he might lean in and sniff you. The sweet scent of a woman very much turns men on. So, if a married man is attracted to you, expect him to lean in for a sniff every so often. 

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He Blushes When You’re Around

People blush for many reasons, and one of them is embarrassment. As he’s admiring your beauty and all sorts of wild thoughts are running through his mind, he may get embarrassed because he’s wondering if his thoughts about you are displayed on his face. 

He Contacts You Often 

Whether he calls you, texts you, or speaks to you when he sees you, he’s always initiating conversation with you. He’ll ask about your plans for the weekend, how your day is going, and how things are in the office.

After a while, you’ll notice a pattern, you’ll hear from him mostly during the week, if you see him, it will also be during the week.

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That’s because married men don’t need to explain themselves when they’re going out to work, and they’re free to call who they please without the fear of getting caught.

They don’t have this same freedom on the weekends unless they’ve got somewhere to go alone. 

He Reveals More About Himself

Although he’s probably not planning on leaving his wife any time soon, he will want you to feel as comfortable as possible around him. During conversation, he’ll slowly start revealing more about himself.

Perhaps he’ll talk about his childhood, his college years, or his children. Either way, he’s letting you know that he wants to establish a connection with you. 

He Wants to Know More About You

When a married man plans on taking your relationship further, he’ll want to know more about the woman who’s caught his attention.

He’ll start asking you about your personal interests, such as your favorite food, pet, perfume, or designer clothing brand. If the timing is right, he may also start asking you sexually related questions such as your favorite position or the wildest place you’ve ever had sex. 

He’ll Want to Spend Time With You Alone

If a married man wants to sleep with you, it’s definitely not happening at his house. Booking a hotel would be a bad idea, if his wife saw the entry on his credit card statement, she would want an explanation.

So he can work out how he’s going to spend time with you alone, he’ll ask about your living arrangements. If you’ve got your own apartment, that’ll work out perfectly for him.

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An obvious sign is that he will start making excuses to spend time with you, by asking if you need help or to help him with stuff.

He will go above and beyond the call of duty to be of service to you, even offering to give you a ride home despite the fact that he lives 30 miles in the opposite direction!

Why Does a Married Man Want to Sleep With You?

Why Does a Married Man Want to Sleep With You?

The answer to this question is a simple one, it’s because you turn him on. Biologically, men are wired differently when it comes to sex. One study found a difference in brain activity between men and women when they were exposed to suggestive images of the opposite sex.

The conclusion was that men experienced an intense sexual desire when looking at new sexual images or thinking about their sexual exploits with new partners.

Additionally, men have the ability to compartmentalize their lives. His wife, and the woman he wants to sleep with are filed away in two separate boxes in his brain.

So although he loves his wife, the desire he has for her is not as strong as the desire he has for the woman he wants to sleep with, and he will pursue her relentlessly as a result. 

Why do Married Men Flirt?

Because marriages can get stale after a while. The dating game is fun because it’s fresh and new. Men have fun chasing, and women enjoy being chased.

But once the honeymoon stage is over, and couples get comfortable, the excitement wears off. For some, when the kids arrive, it’s all downhill from there. If he can’t work things out at home, a man will go out seeking the kind of stimulation he desires.

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But, of course, there are other reasons why a married man flirts, here are three of them:

He’s a Natural Flirt

Some men are just naturally flirtatious, they’re playful, they compliment women all the time and if you didn’t know flirting was just a part of their personality, you would assume they were trying to hit on you. The naturally flirtatious married man doesn’t intend to lead women on, it’s just his way of relating to people. 

He’s Insecure

An insecure man is going to seek validation from other women. He’ll flirt all the time, not just because he finds a woman attractive, but because he wants attention.

He’ll be on the constant lookout for women. He’ll join dating apps, check out women at the grocery store, post office, and the gym. Because of his insecurities, he’s desperate to hear compliments from other women. 

He is Thinking About Leaving His Wife

He may have been married for several years, but he and his partner have had many problems throughout the relationship. After fixing his marriage, and nothing seems to work, he starts thinking about leaving his wife.

But before he does, he wants to test the waters and make sure the grass really is greener on the other side. And flirting with other women is one way of doing this.

What Does it Mean When a Married Man Flirts?

When a married man flirts, it can mean a lot of things. Here are 5 things it means when a married man flirts:

He Wants to Have an Affair

After ten years of marriage, with financial problems, kid problems, kiddy problems, and all the other issues that marriages face, he may be looking to spice up his love life. He’s locked eyes on you, he finds you attractive, and so he starts flirting with you to see where things could go.

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He might not be planning on leaving his wife, but he is certain of one thing, that he comes alive inside when he sees you, and he would love nothing more than to slip in between the sheets with you. 

He Finds a Woman Attractive

As mentioned, just because a man is married doesn’t mean he stops finding other women attractive. His heterosexual radar is still well and truly switched on! Some married men flirt not because they’re thinking about having an affair with you, but because he finds you attractive.

First of all, he enjoys looking at you, and second of all, he simply enjoys the act of flirting with a beautiful woman even though he’s not considering taking his flirting antics any further. 

He Wants to Sleep With a Woman

If a married man thinks you’re sexy and wants to sleep with you, he needs to know that you feel the same before making a move. One way to find out is to flirt with you to see if you flirt back.

Of course, he’ll still tread carefully before going in for the kill, because flirting isn’t always an indication that a woman wants to sleep with a man, she may just be a natural flirt. 

Should You be Flirting With a Married Man?

Should You be Flirting With a Married Man?

Well, I’m not going to tell you how to live your life. Some people will argue it’s unacceptable to flirt with a married man, and some will say whatever floats your boat.

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My take on it is this… you’re a grown adult, and you can do what you wish with your life. However, you must think carefully about your actions and ask yourself the following questions: What are your intentions for flirting with a married man? Is it harmless fun, or do you want to take things further?

Miss or Mistress?

Are you willing to become a mistress? Are you hoping he’s going to leave his wife for you? Once you’ve answered these questions, move forward accordingly.

But don’t start something if you’re unwilling to deal with the consequences. On the flip side, let me give you a black and white answer:

Reasons Not To Flirt!

Here are a few reasons you shouldn’t flirt with a married man: Although flirting is harmless fun, it could set off a tsunami of problems if taken too far. Picture this.

You spend a couple of months flirting and then end up in bed together. You get hooked, and you keep sleeping together. Unfortunately, the guy isn’t very good at hiding his stuff, and his wife finds out. They’ve got kids, she files for a divorce and his entire family is destroyed.

Although you’ve got no loyalty to his wife and kids, and he’s the one who pursued you, could you handle the guilt of knowing that you contributed to the breakup of a family? Or, after sleeping with him, you catch feelings and want more than a sexual relationship.

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He on the other hand doesn’t want a full-blown affair, and neither does he intend to leave his wife for you or any other woman. Whether you’re emotionally mature or not, feelings have a funny way of creeping up on you, and causing you to act in a way that’s out of character. How would you handle a scenario like this? 

Reasons Why You SHOULD Flirt!

Here are a few reasons why you should flirt with a married man: Because it could actually spice up his relationship. When the average person thinks about marriage, their mind immediately goes to traditional monogamous relationships, but there are plenty of unconventional marriages where certain practices are considered acceptable.

For example, he and his wife might have an agreement that he can flirt with other women as long as he tells her about it. This adds an element of surprise to their relationship and spices up their sex life. He and his wife might be swingers, and he flirts with different women to see whether they’re into that lifestyle too.

He may be a part of a religion or culture that allows men to have more than one wife, so his flirting has an end goal, and he’s looking to add you to his household.

Final Thoughts

As you’ve read, men will make it pretty obvious they want to sleep with you. However, their actions tend to speak much louder than their words, so when in doubt, pay particular attention to the way he acts around you.

By now, you should know whether the married man you’ve been kicking it wants to sleep with you, which direction you take next is up to you. 

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Alexander Burgemeester

Alexander Burgemeester has a Master in Neuropsychology. He studied at the University of Amsterdam and has a bachelor's in Clinical Psychology. Want to know more?

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