Last Updated on May 30, 2022 by Alexander Burgemeester
Is he flirting with me? How do guys flirt?
If you’re asking yourself these questions, you have someone specific on your mind! Fortunately, there are many ways to tell if someone is genuinely interested. Here are all the telltale signs a guy is flirting with you.
How to Tell if a Guy Is Flirting With You
Was he flirting with me? Or was he just being friendly? What does flirting mean to guys, and how do I know if he’s into me or not?
It’s frustrating to have to guess, isn’t it? Maybe you’re interested in this guy, but you feel nervous about making the first move. You want to know his intentions before assuming that things are going well.
Keep in mind that male flirting signals can range from being extremely subtle to downright obvious.
But, in most cases, the signs are mixed. A few of them will seem really apparent, but a few of those tiny ones will make you wonder if you’re overreacting.
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Of course, it goes without saying that no two men are exactly alike.
For example, more confident guys might be more straightforward in their approach. Shyer, insecure guys, on the other hand, may appear more nervous.
If you two are already friends, the lines may even feel more blurred.
Flirty behavior can look very similar to friendly behavior, so you need to be able to pick up on subtle signs.
30 Signs a Guy is Flirting With You
He seems to pay close attention to you, and there’s no doubt that you have fun when you’re together.
But, at the same time, you’re not sure if you’re reading too much into things. You don’t want to assume something that isn’t there and feel foolish for jumping the gun!
No matter the situation, here’s how to know if a guy is flirting with you.
#1 He Tries to Make You Laugh
Does he say or do whatever he can to make you laugh? Even if the jokes aren’t exactly funny, does he keep using humor as a way to connect?
When a guy is playful with you, that’s a great sign! If a guy is interested in you, he’s going to work hard to make you laugh. Laughter, after all, connects people, and it’s a classic, telltale sign of flirting!
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#2 He Laughs at Your Jokes
Just like he loves you when you find him funny, most guys automatically find attractive girls relatable and humorous, too! And so, he’ll laugh at your stories and jokes (even if they aren’t very good).
This reflex is relatively automatic. He isn’t intentionally trying to validate you- he just sees you in a really positive light!
#3 He Always Compliments You
Whether it’s telling you how much he loves your dress or how delicious those cookies you baked were, an interested guy definitely relies on praise as a way to flirt. Compliments are one of the oldest forms of connection!
Of course, these compliments should feel genuine. If they’re over-the-top, excessive, or even uncomfortable, that could signify narcissistic brainwashing (an entirely different problem).
#4 He Doesn’t Pay Much Attention to Other Girls
When you’re in a group setting, are his eyes on you? Does he seem unfazed by how other girls act or dress around him? In other words, are you the sole focus?
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If so, it’s a good indicator that he really likes you! A guy who knows what he wants doesn’t care about other people. He cares about getting exactly what he desires!
#5 He Gives You His Undivided Attention
When you’re talking, what’s he doing? Does he maintain prolonged eye contact?
Does he appear to be listening closely to whatever you’re saying? Is he interested and present?
If so, this sign is one of the clearest signs that he’s flirting with you. A good friend will pay attention to what you have to say.
But a guy who’s truly interested will always be as attentive as possible- even with the most mundane stories.
#6 He Remembers What You Say
Listening is one thing (and a very important thing), but does he also pick up on every tiny quirk or interest you tell him?
For example, did he “just happen” to grab your favorite Starbucks order or ask how your math test went?
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If so, that means he’s really listening to you. He isn’t just being polite or paying attention to the most important things.
He’s holding onto every little detail, and only a guy who’s genuinely interested would make that much of an effort!
#7 He Makes Excuses to Get You One-On-One
If a guy likes you, he will want to spend as much time alone with you as he can. In this case, one of the main flirting signs men give is either direct or indirect approaches to separate you from a group.
So, for example, if you’re working on a group project, he might ask if you can stay over a bit later to look over his work.
Or, if he knows you love coffee, he may text you to ask if you want to grab a cup before catching up with friends.
His desires to spend time with you come from wanting to get to know you better (and probably preferring your company over anyone else’s!).
#8 He Teases You
Teasing can feel confusing, but it’s important to remember that we generally tease people when we like them. It’s a sign that we feel comfortable with another person.
Teasing, of course, should be lighthearted. A guy who cares about you can probably detect what will or will not make you feel insecure.
So, if he’s ripping on your core insecurities, that’s more of a red flag (as opposed to if he jokes about smaller things).
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#9 He Fidgets Around You
Fidgeting is an unconscious anxiety response. We tend to do it when we feel stressed, and being around someone we like can certainly be stressful!
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So, pay attention to his body language when he’s around you. If he seems a bit awkward or uncomfortable, it could mean he’s into you more than you realize!
#10 He Is Nervous/Embarrassed Around You
Even the most laidback, confident guy may scramble with his words when he’s around someone he likes. As mentioned, fidgeting is a sign of nervousness, but so is:
- A lack of good eye contact
- Nervous laughter
- Shyness or appearing anxious when talking to you
- Cracking knuckles
- Picking at or biting nails
- Crossed arms
We get embarrassed around others when we care about what they think of us.
And so if he seems totally uncomfortable and he’s giving off plenty of nervous visual cues, that’s a positive sign!
#11 He’s Always Getting a Sneaky Touch
The flirting stage is full of getting to know each other. That refers to both emotional and physical boundaries.
So, whether it’s brushing against your arm, getting food off your face, or stealing a hug, he takes advantage of every opportunity to touch you. To him, even a light touch is a chance to connect.
#12 He Gets Angry When You Go Back to Your Ex-Boyfriend
One of the most crucial flirting signs from a man is how he responds to competition. In that case, nothing might feel more threatening than your ex-boyfriend.
Keep in mind that his anger can come out in all sorts of ways, including:
- Making passive-aggressive statements.
- Trying to convince you why you deserve better.
- Attempting to sabotage your relationship altogether.
- Withdrawing from his friendship with you.
- Getting with another girl (to try to make you jealous).
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#13 He Asks Around If You’re Single
Has your friend recently approached you telling you he’s asked if you’’re dating anyone? If so, that’s a major sign! If he didn’t like you, he wouldn’t care about your relationship status.
And because he didn’t ask you directly, it likely means that he feels nervous or embarrassed around you (which is another sign that he’s interested).
#14 He Is Stalking You Online
Have you noticed that he always checks your stories? Does he like, comment, or otherwise interact with your posts?
If he’s following you closely online, it definitely means he’s interested in you. Of course, creepy stalking is never appropriate (like him creating new profiles after you’ve blocked him). But if it’s all fun and innocent, it’s certainly a positive sign.
#15 He Treats You Differently
Even if you can’t exactly put your finger on it, you get this sense that he’s just different with you.
Maybe he’s softer or more vulnerable or even more playful. Maybe he lets his guard down more with you than he does with others. You feel like you see a side of him nobody else sees.
If that’s the case, it means he probably likes you. He knows your important, and he feels like he needs to show you this important part of himself.
#16 He Wants Your Attention
Does he do whatever it takes to get you to notice him? At times, is it even a bit over-the-top or obnoxious?
His efforts to keep you focused on him aren’t random! He wants to keep you interested and remembering him!
#17 He Can Get Raunchy With You
Does he push the envelope sometimes by making inappropriate jokes or comments? Does he seem to enjoy making you squirm in the best way possible?
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Although it may not be appropriate at the very beginning of getting to know someone, most guys flirt with women by getting a little suggestive.
They’re testing to see how you respond- they’re hoping you’re just as interested as they are in taking things further!
#18 He Seems to Be Looking for Compliments From You
What do you think ofo this shirt? Do you like that restaurant I took you to last week? How was last night for you?
It’s a misconception that men only like to give compliments. They love to receive them, too. And so, they might occasionally fish for praise to see what you really think of them.
Sometimes, this desire for compliments comes from a place of uncertainty.
Maybe he isn’t sure how you really feel about him yet, so he wants confirmation that you’re actually into him. Other times, it can just be because he likes your validation.
But if he didn’t like you, he wouldn’t care too much about that!
#19 He Tries to Impress You
Does he like to surprise you with little gifts? Does he want to make you smile or feel like you’re the most special person in the whole world?
A guy who just wants to be your friend won’t those same lengths! But a guy who likes you will certainly want to impress you as well as he can. And he’ll take advantage of every chance he gets to wow you!
#20 He Seems Annoyed With His Girlfriend
Is this guy in a relationship with someone else? If so, what impression do you have about how he perceives his girlfriend?
Does he seem like he’s disconnected or withdrawn from the relationship? Does it appear like he’s looking for a way to get out of things without hurting her?
If a guy is interested in you, he will start losing interest in his current relationship.
But, of course, that’s no guarantee they will break up. And even if he does end things, you should certainly consider the pros and cons of a rebound.
#21 He Texts You Constantly
Whether it’s sending you silly memes or just checking in to see how you’re doing, a flirty guy will reach out to you regularly. He wants to pay attention to you, and he wants you to pay attention to him in return!
And so, this guy probably won’t play too hard to get. Instead, he’ll showcase his availability and make it as fun as possible to talk to him.
#22 He Gets to Be A Hero Around You
Guys love feeling important. They want to know that you rely on them for comfort and safety.
So even if the damsel-in-distress stereotype seems highly outdated, there’s something to be said about men wanting to protect their loved ones.
Does this guy make a genuine effort to help you when you need it? Does he jump in to solve a problem or give advice?
Does he avoid asking for things in return and seem genuinely satisfied by providing you with what you need?
If so, these signs indicate that you likely trigger his hero instinct. And when a man can feel like a hero in someone’s life, they tend to stick around.
That’s because they feel special and validated in their own right, and they want to have that feeling reinforced over and over again.
#23 He Loves Hanging Out With Your Crowd
Whether it’s spending time talking to your mom or helping your younger sister with her math homework, interested guys want to know who’s in your world.
As a result, they will make a legitimate effort to connect with your friends and family.
Of course, this behavior isn’t necessarily flirtatious. It is, however, suggestive that they are interested in having a relationship with you!
#24 He Can’t Get Enough of Your Body
You look so hot right now. I can’t wait to be alone with you later. Want to send me a picture?
Flirty behavior often becomes extremely direct when he’s fixated on your body. If he’s sending you those sexy messages, there is no denying that he’s flirting with you!
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Of course, creepy messages are a different story. A respectful guy knows how to balance being flirty and appropriate without crossing personal boundaries.
However, if he keeps making you feel uncomfortable (especially after you have asked him to stop), that behavior is a red flag indicating he doesn’t care about your comfort or needs.
#25 He Lets His Guard Down
Has he opened up about his past or shared a really personal secret with you? Does he value transparency, even when it makes him uncomfortable?
Many guys try to protect their feelings. They often grow up with rigid messages about being tough and avoiding anything resembling sensitivity.
So, if he’s breaking through those barriers by revealing more intimate parts of himself, that’s a really good sign! He feels safe and secure with you, and he isn’t worried about you judging him.
#26 He Loves Planning Surprises
Did he make you a special dinner last night? Did he bring you a fun gift to work or arrange for flowers to be delivered at your desk?
Planning surprises isn’t just a lovey-dovey romantic gesture. It’s how flirty guys show they care- especially if they aren’t great with words.
So, don’t overlook those cute moments! A guy who is only being friendly with you certainly wouldn’t make that kind of elaborate effort.
#27 He Suggests Trying New Things
Does he want to take you to the beach on a random Tuesday night? Maybe he’s always wanted to try skydiving, and he suddenly suggests you two go together.
A flirty guy tends to be an adventurous guy! They feel more alive when they’re with you, and they want to hold onto that exciting feeling by engaging in novel experiences together.
They want to enjoy remembering those fond memories for a long time!
#28 He Likes Taking Pictures With You
Is he always trying to get you in a picture? Does he photobomb your selfies?
If so, he might be flirting with you! He wants physical proof showing that you two spend time together.
He’s also probably hoping that you’ll share those pictures on social media for others to see you with him!
#29 He Shows Interest In Your Interests
Maybe you’ve mentioned liking sushi, and now he’s suddenly wanting to try a bunch of sushi restaurants. Or, you told him about a band you liked, and you see that he’s downloaded their music and his playlist.
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When we like people, we tend to want to learn more about their preferences and hobbies.
We know it’s a way to connect. So, if he’s suddenly showing more of an interest in what you like, that’s a good sign! He’s hoping that he can use those passions as a way to bond with you more.
#30 He Tells You He Likes You
This can be obvious or subtle, but most guys will make it known that they like a girl by telling them in some way. For example, it might sound like, I really like spending time together, or I like when it’s just us.
There’s a minimal possibility he’s just being friendly, but there’s a much better chance that he really likes you and doesn’t want to beat around the bush.
How Do You Know if a Guy Is Interested in You or Just Being Friendly?
Even if you know the signs of flirting, you might still feel confused about his behavior.
Are you reading too much into his kindness? Are you mistaking ulterior motives for just a really good personality? Here are some signs that he’s just looking for friendship.
He’s Genuinely Happy About Your Relationship
If you’re already dating someone else, a guy who isn’t interested in you won’t care!
If anything, he’ll be happy that you’re happy. He won’t see the other man as competition because competition only exists when someone has what he wants.
So, if he seems to support your relationship (and if he’s even friends with your boyfriend), he’s probably just being friendly with you.
He Flirts With Other Girls
Some guys are just universal flirts. They like the attention. Unfortunately, this can be true even for committed guys.
But during the initial stages of attraction, most guys will suspend other flirting behavior if they have their eyes on one person. So, if that’s not the case, he’s probably still playing the field.
He’s Totally Content Hanging Out in Groups
As you have learned, if a guy is into you, he will want as much alone time as possible.
But the opposite also holds true. If he isn’t that interested, he will be fine hanging out with you and many other people at the same time.
At this point, he values your friendship, and he won’t care if he has you exclusively to himself.
He Asks to Bring Other People
Let’s say you invite him out to dinner. Does he eagerly accept your invitation? Or, does he ask if he can bring his buddy or another group of friends?
If so, that means he definitely likes spending time with you. He just doesn’t like it enough that he only wants to be with you.
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Remember, if a guy is interested in a relationship, he’ll be ecstatic at you taking the initiative for alone time. He will forget anyone else in his life exists!
He Talks to You About Other Girls
Has he opened up about having a crush on someone else? Does he confide in you with all his girlfriend problems?
If so, he might be gauging your reaction or intentionally trying to make you jealous.
But most guys wouldn’t use this strategy if they were genuinely flirting with someone. They would know that girls don’t want to hear about other girls!
He Wants to Match You Up
Has he offered to set you up with one of his friends? If so, there’s no easy way around it- he’s not flirting.
Instead, he’s being a good friend or trying to inadvertently tell you that he’s not interested in a relationship with you.
If a guy is legitimately flirting with you, the last thing he wants you doing is thinking of other guys!
He Never Wants to Hang Out at Night
Most of us associate nighttime with romance and sexiness. It’s also reserved for romance, especially during the initial dating stages.
So, if he’s always down to hang out during the day- but never at night- it’s probably more of a sign that he wants to be friends.
He Emphasizes Your Friendship
If he often comments about how awesome you are or how you’re always a great friend, it could mean he’s being friendly.
However, a flirty guy will take it a step further. He’ll tell you how sexy you look or how he can’t wait to spend more time with you.
A friendly guy will focus his compliments solely on the friendship. It shows he’s content with what he has, and he probably isn’t interested in pursuing more.
He Makes No Effort In His Appearance
If he dresses down with you, it means he’s comfortable. But it also means he isn’t trying to impress you. Instead, he may see you as just a good friend or even as one of the guys.
But if a guy is flirting with you, he definitely wants to impress you! So he’ll make his very best effort to dress well, smell good, and make you feel lucky!
Male flirting signs become relatively obvious once you know what to look for, male flirting signs become relatively obvious!
And if you’re into him too, it’s time for someone to make that exciting first move!
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