Everybody wants one day where they win against the narcissist, don’t they? You want to shout from the rooftops:
I’m in charge now! You don’t get to call the shots anymore!
Am I making you feel empowered already? We haven’t even gotten started yet!
It just so happens, today is your lucky day.
I know the mind tricks that can set you apart from the victim box you’ve been being pushed into.
Let the tricks commence!
It’s About Time You Claimed
Has enough time passed yet where you feel able to claim a little power for yourself? In fact, if I can be honest, you serve more than a little.
Narcissists take everything that’s yours, and before long, their domination simply becomes a part of life.
But it needn’t be.
Mind tricks are never harmless, and the victims are unaware of these games until it’s too late.
Entering Strange Seas
Isn’t it an odd thought to swap roles like this?
You have long seen them play mind games with you, and now you want to be the one who takes a little charge.
These are indeed strange seas, but when you think about it – you can swim them with ease.
You just need reminding every now and then that you’re capable.
Knowing What Good it’s All For
I think this is what people tend to forget.
Domination isn’t about you becoming the toxic one and the narcissist the victim.
This is about the narcissist having their day, and you now taking over the control of how you feel, and how you’re treated.
This is for you.
Praise Them!
Praising the narcissist might seem like the last thing you want to do, considering the kind of people they are.
They most definitely don’t deserve your good, kind words. But do they have to be true?
God, no!
Not if you really want to dominate, that is!
As long as the narcissist is hearing anything positive said to them, and about them, they’re happy.
This gives you power over how they feel, which they’ve been doing with you for as long as you’ve known them.
It’s so simple just to mention how well the narcissist completed a task or how good they are at what you notice them attempting.
Lifting their spirits like this is a very subtle way of starting to get your power back, knowing that your opinions have a major influence on the narcissist.
How the tables have turned!
Deflate Drama By Allowing Them To Feel Accomplished
Where narcissists walk, drama always follows. A huge part of why narcissists both love and create drama is because, underneath it all, they really don’t feel that accomplished.
Knowing this, they harbor a lot of resentment and anger, especially toward their victims behind closed doors, or when nobody else is looking.
The next time you sense drama building, you can de-escalate in magical ways.
Remind them of how clever they are when you see their blood begin to boil. Remind them that they’re far too good for this, and that you want to see them happy and having a great day because that’s where they thrive the most.
Buy Your Truth Instead of Their Lies
When you surrender your opinions, you also surrender your ability to believe in what you think. Not only are you told that your thoughts or beliefs are wrong or invalid, you learn to be programmed to think that.
Why are you agreeing with what the narcissist says?!
Aiming to claw back your power can only start with allowing yourself to think for yourself again. I know it’s a huge problem when victims just don’t know how to choose anymore.
What do you want for dinner? I don’t mind.
What’s your favorite color? I don’t know. I like them all.
Do you prefer summer or winter? They’re both good for different reasons, I guess.
Where would you prefer to go on vacation this year? I don’t know. You choose.
What do you think of this new government? I don’t really know enough about them.
Nothing, I repeat nothing, can form in your mind as some kind of yes or no, black-or-white answer.
Where has all that power gone?
To the narcissist!
So, how about you start to think of your truth as a reality, rather than allow the narcissist to change it for you?
I know I am making it sound easier than it will be, but with one change, you can start the ball rolling. As soon as you do, you’ll start to get the bug for changing more and more
Don’t Call Them Out – Ignore!
Narcissists kind of love it when you call them out because they already have their revenge or your punishment up their sleeve. It’s as if they goad you to the point where you crack so they can blame you for your behavior.
Not only does that totally sidestep their behavior, but it also puts you, the innocent victim, in the spotlight.
Ignoring them takes away their power. It’s as if they’re talking to themselves, as you no longer give up your energy to supply them.
Be Purposely Vague
Vague city!
Don’t even contemplate giving the narcissist what they want.
If you can change your reaction, you can change the outcome. It really is that easy, but I know you’ll initially want to chew the inside of your cheek away with frustration.
Be vague. Don’t give your game away. Dilute your response so they don’t get their supply.
Talk About Their Interests: Get Off Topic
If you sense a familiar dynamic rising, you might want to naturally revert to what has always been.
Perhaps that might look like you getting yelled at, or being blamed for something you didn’t do.
Why?
Well, just because the narcissist feels like it!
Not anymore!
Your power and dominance over the situation can make it look like you are steering this toxic ship in another direction.
Ask them what their latest score predictions are if they love sports. See if they fancy catching a concert or a show if that’s their bag. Talk about work or the gym.
You know them, so you know what will work.
But I guarantee that it will work!
Hold Back on Potential Narcissistic Gossip
Narcissists love to gossip because they like to know that other people are doing wrong too.
They want to know that they can get together and drag others down. That way, they can be solely to blame, right?
Well, if that’s been you in the past, just stop.
Let them try, but fight the urge to belittle or moan alongside them.
You’re better than that.
Look After Yourself: Me, Myself and I
I’m not telling you twice – but if you’re going to wait for the narcissist to start taking care of you, then you’ll be in for a long wait.
Don’t sit around waiting to be complimented or taken out.
Do it yourself!
Catch that movie, go see your friends, do that hike. All the while, they refuse, and you miss out.
Why should you?
Go and live your life and dominate!
