Is it Cheating if You’re on a Break?

Last Updated on May 30, 2022 by Alexander Burgemeester

You’ve been seeing your guy for quite a while, but things have not been going so well. So, the two of you decide to take a break from each other.

You see him out with another female. You immediately get angry and almost approach him, then remember your relationship status.

Is it cheating if you’re on a break? Because that was not what you had in mind when you told him you wanted a break. Now you are curious about what a break means. 

Is it Cheating if You’re on a Break?

Is it Cheating if You’re on a Break?

Is hooking up with someone while on a break considered cheating? If you’re on a break are you single? According to Glamour Magazine,

“Cheating is anything that involves another person, from trawling dating apps to sexting to actually having sex.” The magazine goes on to add, “If you have to question, ‘Is this cheating?’ it’s probably cheating.”

Many people fail to realize that being on a break from your guy is not the same as breaking up. If he understood the definition, then he may not have cheated.

People in relationships decide to go on a break due to different reasons. So, has your man told you that he wants a break? Has he expressed interest in seeing other people? Here’s what he may mean:

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What Does it Mean When You are on a Break?

What Does it Mean When You are on a Break?

What does it mean if you are on a break, and how is it different for everyone? Are there clear rules set before you took a break? There would be many varied answers if we were to ask the general public.

This is because the answer to the question is subjective. In every relationship, there is something that makes it unique. Some people have a rule that each party has to follow. Others may have to make promises that they’re not allowed to break.

According to

“When couples can’t stay together or even talk to each other without losing it, they stay away from each other until they are clear about what they want.

In short, they take a break. Taking a break is nothing but giving each other space and time they need to rethink and gain clarity about where they stand in the relationship and what they want from it.”

If you and your partner decide to take a break, you’ll need to have a talk. Both of you should be on the same page because a break doesn’t mean the same thing for everyone.

There should be clear boundaries and a time frame for how long the separation should be. Your partner won’t know your expectations unless you tell him.

Even if your guy considered cheating, he wouldn’t do it now when you put rules in place. Why? Because he knows for sure that that it is not allowed.

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For some people, telling your partner that you want a break is an easy way to break up with them.

Yet, this is not a good approach because it is not clear that the relationship is over. If you’d like to end things with your significant other, the best practice is to tell them like it is.

What Does Taking a Break Mean to a Guy?

A break has different meanings for both genders. Guys may think it gives leeway to cheat. Why? Because so many guys tend to think with their genitals.

Guys believe that women tend to want to form a connection. But, if there was no talk about not seeing anyone else during that period, and you are on a break, then it might not end well.

He might want to explore because, in his mind, he is single during that time.

Many men claim to see it as casual sex. The fact that the both of you are on a break doesn’t make it count as cheating. Often, if you were to reverse the roles, your man would not be happy about his girl having sex with someone else.

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Men came up with the theory that they cheat because they have no feelings towards the other woman. Women tend to fall in love, they say.

Although most women like to bond with a person before having sex, it doesn’t excuse the man. Is your man having sexual contact with someone because you both decided to take a break? Then he is telling you that his sexual desires come before his love for you.

Sometimes the men feel guilty about hooking up with someone during the break. So, they tell their partners about the encounter.

The crazy thing is that many men say it to their girlfriends like it was no big deal. If the girl initiated the break, it would now have her thinking that she had made a horrible mistake. As messed up as it sounds, some guys hook up with another girl because they are angry. How dare you ask for a temporary break!

Men don’t like to express their feelings. So, ask questions or give information so that your guy doesn’t misinterpret anything.

If communication is not a part of the relationship, many things could go wrong. You might find your boyfriend mingling on dating apps while you’re on a break.

If your boyfriend comes to you and expresses wanting to take a break, it may be because he is not into you anymore. Instead of breaking up with you, he says he wants to take a break to avoid hurt feelings.

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What Does Taking a Break Mean to a Girl?

A break means taking some time apart to work on yourself from the female perspective. In that way, you hope that the relationship can be better.

If a girl is in love with you, she would consider a separation temporary and only to better the relationship. Girls are more loyal if they are in love. This is because they think with their heart and not their private area as men claim to do.

If your girl finds out that you are dating another female during the break, it can hurt her. First of all, she would be heartbroken.

If you guys did not discuss seeing other people, she might consider it is cheating. She would also feel like you never loved her. Girls love to feel like they are the only ones in the world that you would ever love.

In the back of a woman’s mind, she hopes her life turns out like storybooks of princesses. She will likely have that mindset if she is in love with you.

A lot of the time, girls want to go on breaks to test their boyfriends. It is a way of assurance and validation. Many women go off the basis that if a man can live without them, then he wasn’t in love in the first place.

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Can You Date Other People When You are on a Break?

Does being on a break mean your single? Can you date other people when you are on a break? These are common questions that people ask looking for answers.

A break is not the same as a break-up. So that should answer the question, “if you’re on a break are you single?” 

It is not wise to date other people when you and your partner temporarily separate. It will do no good for your relationship. In fact, it will only bring more distance between you.

When you go on a break, you intend to get back together with your guy. Why on earth then would you go out on a date with someone else? It doesn’t make sense. 

Men use the excuse of wanting sex and shoot down claims of being in love with the person they date. But, is your sex drive so high that you couldn’t even take the time to work on yourself to be a better person to your partner?

If a guy is cheating during a break in a relationship, he doesn’t love you. If he loved you, he would not want to cheat. Everything should not be about sex.

What happens when you want to start a family with him. Would he cheat on you when you’re pregnant? If sex is more crucial than his love for you, then there is no guarantee that he wouldn’t cheat. 

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Why do People Take a Break in Relationships?

Why do People Take a Break in Relationships?

What does a break mean in a relationship, and why do people take them? Is taking a break good for relationships? Are you still in a relationship when on a break?

Taking a break from your partner is not wise, yet many people do it. The reason why couples decide to temporarily separate varies.

Most times, the idea comes from one partner in the relationship. According to Oprah Daily Magazine 

“you may get the sense that something about the relationship is troubled, unsatisfying, or that the passion is fizzing out. Instead of being energized by your time together, perhaps you feel anxious, drained, or uninspired.”

Some of the reasons are understandable, whereas other reasons make no sense. Here are some reasonable reasons why people choose to break in relationships.

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To work on themselves 

For a relationship to grow and be healthy, both individuals must work on themselves. Sometimes people feel the need to do that while separated from each other.

It might be hard to do so while together. Some relationships are very toxic. Instead of breaking up, couples take breaks to reflect on their own lives.

Or, it may be in the hope of finding themselves. A woman may choose temporary separation to punish her partner for cheating, like a time-out for hurting her.

Yet a break rarely solves this issue. In fact, it might only encourage it. If your partner slept with someone else while you were together, it might be best if you end the relationship.

A lot of the time, people stay together after cheating because of the kids. But, staying in draining and unhappy relationship isn’t suitable for the kids either. 

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Bad timing 

You and your partner are not mature enough to be in a relationship. It could be that your parents are not okay with the relationship due to age.

Still, he shouldn’t be dating other people since the issue was immaturity if this is the case. Taking a break from your boyfriend doesn’t always work out.

Why? Because interests change over time as both individuals get older. What was attractive to them at age 12 isn’t appealing anymore.

Work/school pressures

This is a common reason people take breaks from each other. Studying can take a toll on a person. Does the relationship demand constant attention?

Managing it while studying might not be easy. Couples in school know this struggle all too well. Not being able to go out with your girlfriend or boyfriend because it’s a school night. Big exam on Monday, so you have to say in on the weekend? These things do happen when you are a student.

Long-distance relationships 

This is another common reason people choose to break from their partners. But, in some instances, that separation turns out to be a break-up.

When people spend time apart, feelings fade. They need to work to keep the relationship interesting. Otherwise, it becomes boring and repetitive.

Complicated situations 

Sometimes complicated situations can break a relationship apart. For instance, a past ex had a child with the guy you are with. Things now become problematic because of the ex.

This situation does not always cause an issue. Some people work with it, but there are times when everything isn’t always jolly. So couples take breaks so that the ones in the complicated situation can figure things out.

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So, is taking a break good for relationships? The answer is yes. For some people, taking a break can be an excellent idea. It lets you review what the partnership means to both of you.

It’s sort of like putting a bookmarker in the relationship. Chicago-based licensed marriage and family therapist Anita Chlipala says, “when a couple is having issues, a break can provide evidence of what’s the best decision.”

Why it is Not Smart to Hook Up When You Are on a Break

Why it is Not Smart to Hook Up When You Are on a Break?

Hooking up when you’re on a break is not wise because sex has the potential to complicate things. You may struggle with the idea of the person you love being intimate with someone else.

Then you might have trouble opening up to him (and he to you). So you’ll keep mum about your sex lives during the separation, leading to trust issues.

The purpose of taking a break is to get to know yourself outside your relationship. Hooking up with someone else makes it difficult to do that.

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How to Move on After One Person Hooked Up During a Break

How to Move on After One Person Hooked Up During a Break?

Remember, a break is about both of you exploring what you need. If one of you missed the mark and hooked up during the break, it’s not the end of the world.

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You can move on together, especially if you did not define boundaries before the break. This decision is very personal, though, and you should not make light of it.

You will need to check the level of affection you feel and whether you can trust each other going forward.

To conclude, it’s vital to learn how to communicate better when in a relationship. It’s the best remedy for rocky moments. In moments like those, you need to spend more time together.

Do things to keep your relationship spicy. There are many things you can do. For example, you can go on more dates and trips and have a fun time together whenever you can.

Taking a break from your partner can be challenging, and there may be uncertainty about the do’s and the don’ts.

But, if you believe that a break from each other is the route to make things better, you need to put rules in place. Communication is key!

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Alexander Burgemeester

Alexander Burgemeester has a Master in Neuropsychology. He studied at the University of Amsterdam and has a bachelor's in Clinical Psychology. Want to know more?

3 thoughts on “Is it Cheating if You’re on a Break?”

    • This is true. I am dealing with this today in my life. I was just looking online to see if I was the only thinking it’s not okay to get with someone else when you’re taking a break. Glad I’m not or this world is fudged. And yea, I’m the guy, not the girl.

  1. if im on a break with a guy, and the next day another guy asked me out and i said yes without thinking about things first, is it classified as cheating or being a bad person?


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