Narcissists lie! I don’t just mean some of them, I mean all of them.
There are 12 things they do to prove they are lying directly to your face, and that’s where we start today.
If you really want to know how honest the narcissist is, make it your mission to look out for these things because the second you spot them, you will never unsee them.
Start empowering yourself!
#1 Breathing
It’s better to assume they’re all capable of the same things as each other, because that way you can give them the same lack of credit when they eventually lie to you.
I know, I know. It’s a really sarcastic start, but I couldn’t resist! This is my way of telling you that all narcissists are the same.
You’re never going to meet one who protests to be telling the truth at all times, even if they are as convincing as you think they are.
#2 Accusing you
There’s a secret about narcissists, and it’s that if they are accusing you of something you know you didn’t do, you can guarantee they’re saying those things because they are actually the guilty party.
This is called projecting, and is done to take any flack off them.
They don’t want your accusations, so if they can get in before you and accuse you, it will push away any light of suspicion away from them.
In other words – and accusing narcissist is a lying narcissist!
#3 Giving you the silent treatment
What a classic way to get some kind of sick response from you, right? The silent treatment really is a cheap shot, and it bothers me that so many victims live long term with the fear of any silence.
Even now, I know of victims who try to fill silence with absolutely anything just to prevent the sound from falling away entirely because they hate silence.
If you are experiencing the silent treatment, just be aware that there’s no reason for it at all, therefore by default, all silent treatment is an outright lie.
#4 Love-bombing you
The opposite of the silent treatment is love-bombing, and that is also how you can find out a narcissist is lying.
These extremities occur when a narcissist wants to detract you from a truth that will hurt you.
To keep you strung along, they lie. And to cover those lies, they throw as much love at you as you can take.
Always be cautious of any person who is acting out of character.
#5 Gaslighting you
Trying to convince you that your truth is not real is a liar. Gaslighting is a sick way of manipulating a person to think, feel or act a certain way, and the worst part about it is, it works.
You’re so sensitive.
That didn’t happen.
You’re imagining things again.
I didn’t say that.
You’re always crying over silly things.
These comments stick, and they convince a person that their reality is fake.
I think that’s a really dark way to behave with a person you claim to care about.
#6 Crying to protest their innocence
The more a person protests, the more guilty they are likely to be, and that’s a fact.
So if you have a narcissist in your life who is making a lot of noise, I would firmly suggest assuming that they are hiding something from you that they don’t want you to know.
As the tears fall, the unmistakable mask grips firmly onto their face without so much as a hint that they’re pretending to be a victim.
They got the attention they wanted, but the fact of the matter is, they’re lying to your face.
#7 Lying to you about others
This is sometimes even worse than being lied to without involving others.
When you hear what the narcissist has to say about other people, it can leave you shocked to your core.
I thought you liked them!
Why are you saying these things?
What do you get out of gossiping like this?
What would they think of you?
Those are things you want to fire back, but instead, you just look in amazement as the narcissist keeps talking.
Suddenly, it’s official.
You know it’s all lies.
#8 Telling you secrets
Secrets that the narcissist’s so-called fiends would spill are never solely for themselves to keep, especially as the narcissist loves to be the one to tell you things like:
You’ll never guess what I was told today.
I promised I wouldn’t say anything but…
The narcissist is lying to your face. They would have promised to keep whatever they’re telling you a secret, and that can be a real eye-opener.
If they’re telling you the secrets of others, imagine the possibility that they are telling others secrets about you?
Suddenly, the trust has gone, and you are looking through a lens of uncertainty as they talk to you in the most discomforting of ways.
#9 Being sarcastically kind to you
There’s nothing honest or kind about sarcasm when it’s set out to hurt you or make you feel worthless.
Sure, that dress looks amazing if you think it does.
Yeah, that haircut makes you look 20 years old.
You’re just looking for a kind word, and instead, you’re insulted and lied to through the filter of sarcasm.
Classic narcissism.
#10 Hiding their phone
Uh-oh! We all know what a hidden phone means. I’m not saying anybody should be parading their phone in front of their partner, but a hidden phone? That’s a totally different story.
You have to ask yourself, what’s trying to be kept from you? Why so secretive?
I hate to be so obvious, but the answers aren’t going to be innocent, and I can assure you, they also won’t be what you want to hear.
I’ll just say ‘lies’ for now.
#11 Refusing to tell you any passwords or pin codes
Continuing from point ten, we have the classic secretive pin codes and passwords to everything, and that’s because whatever is on the other side of those codes, is not for your eyes at all.
It’s one thing not shouting to the world, or even not having security of devices, it’s quite another for you to not even have the slightest clue what they are.
The narcissist will convince you that you’re being too needy for wanting to know, but in reality, they’re being too secretive by not telling you.
#12 Changing bank login details or going ‘paperless’ suddenly
Why the sudden shift? Is it because you’ve spotted something on a statement previously, or has the narcissist started up a subscription that they don’t want you knowing about?
Changing details can prove tricky when you live together and work out the bills as a couple, so it would be really suss for them to suddenly start wanting to do it by themselves.
Perhaps you already have an inkling, or maybe you’re used to them not disclosing where they spend money.
Either way, the narcissist is lying to your face, and you shouldn’t let it slide. Hopefully this will be your ‘enough is enough’ moment.
