I get it. You want to act in a way that will shake the narcissist to their core.
They’re used to being in control, with power that not many people would argue with.
But the tables need to be turned, and you want to make them jealous, powerless, and irrelevant overnight.
Well, you came to the right place to find out how, because I’ve got all you need right here.
#1 Narcissism and jealousy
If you didn’t already know, narcissists fall under the most jealous people you will ever have the displeasure of meeting.
They don’t just wish they could have something somebody else has, they will pace their house, muttering and mumbling their way into a pit of despair at the fact that this particular person doesn’t deserve that very thing.
How dare they.
I’ve worked so hard, and for what?
Can you believe they got that vacation cabin on his wages?
Of course, they will brag about it!
You won’t hear the end of it, and they won’t stop talking about it, either.
Narcissism hates people who have it all, because it means they don’t have it all.
The problem here is that they’ve convinced themselves they do, and the process of convincing everybody else has been ruined now.
#2 Narcissism and power
Power is another way of knowing you’re dealing with a narcissist. They have to have it all, all of the time, and won’t stop at anything to get it.
Will they hurt you? Yes.
Will they hurt anybody else they claim to love? Without a doubt.
Power makes them feel big, bold, and helps their ego grow.
Without it, they feel they’re letting the real, weak and feeble version of themselves into the world.
The obsession then becomes about you and how you react to their demand to be in charge.
Your supply is your helplessness, and the narcissist converts it into more power for themselves.
#3 How narcissists hate being irrelevant
You can see why narcissists despise being irrelevant. Let them fall down in the line of order, and they lose their minds.
Tell them news or gossip last, and they pace with anger wondering why you didn’t call them sooner. Ignore them for a nanosecond, and they will punish you for not prioritizing them.
Irrelevance will fire up the part of a narcissist that makes them feel panicked.
I don’t matter.
I’m not worthy.
You have dented my ego.
I am taking it personally.
Yeah, there it is. The entitlement is extraordinary, but there is a way to make it disappear overnight.
In fact, you can ignite that jealousy, and strip the power from them.
I don’t like to encourage game playing, but this is no game. This is all you and empowering you.
There is nothing better.
#4 Make it your mission!
So what can you do to make a narcissist jealous, powerless and irrelevant overnight?
Well, it’s all in the way you act.
Think about your time with the narcissist up until now. You probably did what they asked of you at all times. You did anything to keep the peace. You’d forgive and forget.
But most of all…
…You always felt the need to explain yourself.
I’m just going here for a while, I won’t be long.
I applied for that job and got it.
I’d really love to earn more money for us.
You’re right, I won’t talk to them again.
I only did it because…
Victims constantly explain themselves to their abuser, in the hope that a clear line of communication will somehow ease the strain of the relationship and make it more pleasant.
I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t. All your explaining will do is make the narcissist subject to more power and jealousy than ever before.
And your need to prioritize telling them will give them the impression that they’re relevant..
#5 When you explain yourself
Every single time you explain yourself, you’re giving a part of you away to a person who doesn’t and will never appreciate you.
Narcissists don’t care whether you overshare, or shift your boundaries in order to please them.
They don’t care what it means to you, so I have to tell you:
This boils down to you, and deeming your life too sacred to share with the narcissist.
Sharing, explaining, and acting in ways that will keep them satisfied isn’t living for you, it’s living for them.
When you explain, you are handing the narcissist the kind of power that they can’t live without, and they’ve programmed you to be that way.
When you stop, you stop everything, leaving a lot of room for them to fester in negativity, rather than push it onto you.
#6 When the narcissist looks for your reaction
What usually might happen then, is the narcissist approaches you and asks you something.
That’s when you’d normally hand over information, maybe what you’ve been up to, or news of a job offer, or anything that will reassert their narcissism.
When they push their jealousy or power onto you, they’re immediately looking for your reaction to it.
They want compliance, and no questions asked. The troubling part of that is that they’ve trained you to be loyal and think nothing of what they say, because asking questions means they’re power over you is in dispute.
Give them nothing.
Explain nothing.
Be as boring as you can be.
Keep your news to yourself.
Keep your progress to yourself.
Keep your success to yourself.
Let the narcissist guess what’s going on in your life, rather than have a free pass to all breaking news.
It’s the only way you will be able to live more freely, and not be tied down every five minutes by their negativity.
That has so far in your life slowed you down and potentially prevented you from moving forward.
Now is the time for you, and now is the time to prove to yourself that you don’t have to share with toxic people whose only motive is to ruin what you’ve got going on.
#7 Overnight? Yes!
I know this works overnight, because I’ve spoken to enough of you to understand how narcissists operate.
They are so used to patterns; patterns they create, and patterns you fall in line with.
When you reflect on them, you realize they aren’t healthy patterns, and they don’t serve you anywhere near as well as they should.
As a result, you’re left spreading your news, living your life, and having it picked apart by power and jealousy, making the narcissist feel more relevant than ever.
When you stop feeding them first hand information, you stop being a person they can go to, to control. They can’t get what they want, and they get majorly frustrated by it.
That shouldn’t be your problem; it never was.
The shocking thing about this being possible to do overnight is that the narcissist will think nothing of waking up the next day with you.
For them, it’ll be business as usual. It’s only when conversations start that they notice this change in you. You’re being more private, and giving much less away.
The less information they have, the more jealous, powerless and irrelevant they become!
