Life is all about making that effort, right? But you know what? Just sometimes, you don’t even have to try, it just happens.
This is definitely the case with narcissists when you want to drive them crazy.
Narcissists hate being pulled into a frenzy caused by you, but when they are, you’ll know about it.
They will cuss you and try to fight you in their own toxic way, but hey, it was an accident, right?
Right…?
Why Would You Want To?
I know it seems odd to think about wanting to do something negative to the person you’ve grown attached to.
It’s not within you to be unkind or play games, but you know, sometimes you don’t even have to try in order to drive a narcissist insane.
Sometimes, it can just happen all by itself.
1. Ignoring Them, Even Slightly
It’s well known that narcissists thrive on attention, but who are they without any of it?
You can give them your fear, anger, or admiration, it doesn’t matter to them.
What matters is that you are using your energy to give them. The moment you stop, it drives them crazy.
Why Does it Drive Them Crazy?
I’ll give you three reasons!
- They believe they are the center of your world, so this throws that right off.
- If you don’t acknowledge them, it derails their sense of importance. The ego is dented!
- It forces them to realize that they don’t actually control you – which was always the truth.
How Might Ignore Them Accidentally
Sometimes we get busy, right? We don’t mean to neglect people; it just happens. You could be caught up with somebody else, or tied into a work problem.
If the narcissist isn’t a priority, you’re going to drive them wild with rage.
That also includes dismissing their jokes, or failing to respond when they try to provoke you.
And Their Reaction?
Depending on the narcissist, you can expect passive-aggressive comments, guilt trips, or even sudden disappearing acts to make you chase after them.
Is being ghosted by the narcissist really such a terrible thing…?
2. Setting Boundaries and Sticking to Them
You know your boundaries drive a narcissist up the wall, and that’s why you’ve probably been keen to let yours go.
You don’t want the trouble, the hassle, or the clap back from them if you dare assert yourself, so you don’t bother.
The fun part comes when you just naturally become somebody who has boundaries and refuses to shift them for anybody.
Why Does it Drive Them Crazy?
Lack of boundaries will lead to trouble. Having them does these things.
- They expect you to give in to their demands all of the time, but you don’t.
- Boundaries mean they don’t have unlimited access to you any longer. Great!
- It shows them that their manipulation isn’t working. Boo hoo for them.
How You Can Set a Boundary
You have to learn to say no without over explaining yourself. You don’t owe it to them, and you should never let them guilt-trip you into doing something.
The conversation ends when it starts getting toxic, or history will keep repeating itself.
Seeing Their Reaction
Tantrums? Outbursts? Accusations?
Expect nothing less from a person so emotionally dysregulated.
In other words: I cannot manipulate you any longer!
3. Being Happy Without Them
Happiness is the one thing that will just drive a narcissist crazy, and you don’t even have to try to do it. Just be.
Narcissists want to be responsible for your moods, including your happiness.
If they aren’t, and you’re doing it all by yourself, then they will be driven to the brink of insanity.
Why Does it Drive Them Crazy?
Narcissists believe your happiness should depend on them, and if you’re happy without them, it means they don’t have power over how you feel any more.
Talk about triggering their inner emptiness!
What Accidental Happiness Looks Like
Start getting excited by the little things again. A hobby or achievement they had no part in, or enjoying time with friends or family without seeking their approval.
Just live your life.
And Their Reaction?
If the narcissist isn’t trying to sabotage it, they will be dismissing your happiness like it doesn’t matter to them.
Who cares, right?
Do it anyway!
4. Calling Out Their Lies
And why shouldn’t you? So what if it drives them crazy?
If you’re going to be expected to stomach having a narcissist around, they’re going to have to deal with the fallout when you notice something is amiss.
Why Does it Drive Them Crazy?
Think about it. The narcissist’s entire self-image is built on deception.
They tolerate being made to feel or look stupid, or be exposed. If you start to call them out, it means you’re paying attention.
Calling Out Lies
It can start as innocently as remembering details they hoped you’d forget. You might say something like:
That’s not what you said last time.
Doesn’t matter how calm you speak, but you can laugh off their exaggerations instead of being impressed. That’s all it takes.
And Their Reaction?
Watch the narcissist try to double down on their lie, or change the subject. If you’re really unlucky, they might get aggressive and/or defensive.
5. Not Being Afraid to Walk Away
I applaud anybody who can openly and honestly decide that they’ve had enough of life with a narcissist.
If you can steer clear of their manipulation to keep you, then you will always have the upper hand.
And you don’t have to make threats or make a drama of it, but you can just shrug and say, “You know what? I’m done here.”
The narcissist’s grip will not work on you if you do.
Why Does it Drive Them Crazy?
They don’t want to lose control over you, always assuming you will need them.
If you are happy to walk away, you don’t see them as importantly as they want you to.
Walking Away? Really?
Can you calmly remove yourself from a toxic conversation? Walking away doesn’t have to mean forever, but it can mean, “This conversation doesn’t feel good to me.
I’m out of here.” You’re showing them that you put yourself first, before any drama they’re trying to stir up.
Seeing Their Reaction
Oh, expect the hoovering to start immediately! They want to pull you back, and if they can’t, the smear campaign will soon follow.
If you can handle that and still not be bothered, then you’re doing yourself a great favor.
6. Refusing to Engage in Drama
Drama is not good for you, so let it be known to the wider world – including the narcissist – that you aren’t going to be a part of theirs.
Again, this is about taking the control away from the narcissist and giving it back to you.
Why Does it Drive Them Crazy?
If you aren’t playing the game ,then they have nothing to win.
Read that back again.
How You Refuse Their Drama
You can respond to their rage with a neutral “Okay.” Let them know that you’re feeling very, “whatever.”
Refuse to argue about something pointless. It’s just a waste of energy and time, and always do it calmly.
Seeing Their Reaction
Guilt.
Tears.
Escalation.
Silent treatment.
Watch and wait, but either way, they’re going to go crazy!
