Before you say anything, I know…
Shocker.
Narcissists lie.
In fact, they lie about anything and everything you can possibly imagine. They’re not only top tier liars – they will do so without conscience and morals.
And I know all you want is for them to just get caught.
If they did, everybody would see them for who they are – job done!
I want you to see past the person they present you with – because that in itself is also a big, fat lie.
Let’s look at the top 9 biggest lies about narcissists, and how you can escape every single one simply by knowing them.
Don’t Fall For The “Honesty”
As much as they want you to, and boy do they really want you to – don’t buy it.
If you have gone through the motions with one narcissist, it’s safe to say you can assume the same for all others out there.
They all lie. And none of them care about it.
Falling for their fake honesty will give you a false sense of security, and it will also leave you severely disappointed when they inevitably let you down.
The interest to be kind and follow through with their words is never the narcissist’s intention – but it’s always where they place your heart – so you always stay, and never leave.
Expose Time! 9 Biggest Lies About Narcissists
#1 That You Can Count on Them
If you think you can count on a narcissist, you need to think again.
The only time you can really count on them is to let you down, because that’s all they will ever show you they can do.
Narcissists fool you in that respect. When you meet them, they promise to deliver in every way.
They will make you happy.
They will ensure you have what you need.
They will listen to you, and never lie.
They won’t change you.
That they will always be there.
What happens when you discover none of that is true? It means you’ve peeled back the layers of fakery to reveal the real person behind it all:
The narcissist.
#2 That They Love You
Love is never going to be what the narcissist shows you. They can throw whatever fancy object or promise your way, for sure. Does that mean they love you?
No.
It means they know how to pacify you.
Love is not something they know how to feel, but they do love to speak of it.
Saying the words aren’t the problem – but that’s where the lie starts.
If it isn’t the truth – then it’s a huge lie exposed.
#3 That They Even Care
Narcissists will always want you to think they care.
I’m just coming from a place of concern.
You need me.
Let me help you.
And why wouldn’t you believe it when somebody says these words? They sound so sincere, and they will make you want to open up and be the person who trusts and says yes.
But is that really where the truth is?
In truth – no. They don’t even care. The only thing they care about is getting what they want from you, even if it means you getting hurt as a result.
Your trauma is not their problem.
#4 That Your Secrets Are Being Kept
Trust me, I won’t tell a soul.
Your secret is safe with me.
Your secret is never safe with a narcissist. Whatever it might be is obviously something you want to be kept quiet.
Perhaps it’s important news, or a part of your past that you want to keep under wraps.
It doesn’t really matter what the secret is – the part that should bring your attention up is that they promised to not tell – and they did.
Narcissists will spread your secrets for the simple reason being:
Their need to gossip about you is more important than the promise they made to keep it to themselve.
#5 They Won’t Use Your Past Against You
While the narcissist may not have been present in your past, they are certainly making sure it stays alive.
#6 They Want You To Have Friends and Family Around You
You’ll notice how much they want to support and be there for you, and in wanting that they will want your closest, nearest and dearest to be a part of your life.
It may even be that during those first weeks and months of knowing the narcissist, they will encourage you to spend as much time with your loved ones as you can.
When you do, it will one day become a problem. When it becomes a problem, you will hear phrases such as:
“You’re too good for them.”
“You give them so much of your time, and they give you so little in return.”
“Why do you bother?”
“You never seem to make time for me anymore. I miss you.”
It’s all how they begin to isolate you, so you only rely on them.
#7 You Are Free
If only!
Nobody is free all the while they are signed up in some way to a narcissist, and it’s only when you leave that you realize how trapped you were.
They want you to believe you are, and they can do that by giving you access to a little money, or letting you go out on a night out.
But you are mistaken if you think you’re free. It’s all a guise.
#8 Your Reality Matters
It only matters at the start! Soon enough, that reality is going to be:
Taken.
Shaken.
Replaced.
Replaced by theirs.
With absolutely no conscience from them. They will gaslight and convince you of an alternate pattern of thought just by throwing in phrases like:
It didn’t happen that way.
You must be confused.
I think you’re imagining things.
You seem to have lost your memory.
Are you sure you don’t need to go to the doctor?
Your reality is only held up when you first meet them. Once they get their foot in the door, it’s game over.
#9 It’s All In Your Head
If you think you are piecing the puzzle together and understanding narcissism – the narcissist is going to do everything in their power to take that from you.
Mark my words: it’s not going to be pretty when they prove what a liar they are.
You will think, “I thought I had met somebody who was the best person in the world.” Soon enough, you will see the truth, but you will feel stuck in that reality.
It’s not all in your head. You aren’t imagining anything.
Narcissism is very real, and it’s very damaging.
Please never assume it’s not real.
