Ah, the fruit of temptation falls at your feet, and you want to pick it up and take a bite.

Narcissists place that temptation at your feet, and make sure you notice it. That’s when their victims succeed in being ensnared by the illusion of so many aspects of your relationship with them.

But enough is enough. 

You want answers, and you want them fast. 

Avoiding further temptation will prevent your heart from hurting, and I’m here for that.

Let’s get started on stepping away!

I Get It…

Narcissists by definition are incredibly tempting people. 

You start by hanging off every word they say – after all – they make each sound sound so sweet.

After that, you’re hooked. It’s like you have a lifetime supply of charm at your fingertips, and someone to tell you how wonderful and loved you really are.

Except, well, that last part never lasts long, and it’s never genuine. 

And you? Well, you love it. You love the way this person who has it all makes you feel. You’re like a moth circling a flame, and you can’t break free from that high level magnetism.

From The Start, They’re So Tempting

It’s the game all narcissists play from the very first smile. I fully understand why you may struggle to see it any other way. I mean, we all want love.

We all love that initial feeling when you meet somebody new, and it’s all exciting and all these promises are made. 

You have no idea you’re about to be locked up in this emotional prison, but you know what?

The best way to keep a person from escaping prison is to make them feel like they aren’t in prison. 

That’s what it feels like when all the abuse thrown at you is surrounded by fragmented pieces of love, and breadcrumbs of affection.

You get blindsided by their temporary compliments or kindness, and that temptation keeps victims returning for more. 

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Tempted By Fake Love

I’ll call it what it is for you guys, because it’s the only way you’re going to really see the narcissist’s character honestly:

Their love is fake. Their promises are empty and calculated. They manipulate you so that you believe what they tell you, and forget what you believe. 

The fake love reels people in, and I wonder if you can resonate with that in some way. That magical moment when you feel like you’ve truly met somebody who makes you feel like never before.

To be fully aware that being in their presence exceeds all other people you’ve met and ‘though you’ve loved.’

And here you are – with what can only be described as the perfect person – tempted by their lies and twisted games. These are designed to keep you from breathing in your own reality, so you can fall under their spell – and control.

Lowering Your Standards

The closer the narcissist gets to your heart, the more they will try and reshape it.

Whatever you keep in it will change. How you feel about yourself, what you believe to be good and true, how much potential you have, and how you bring happiness to others will all change.

What this does, is lower your standards. You drop a boundary here and there, and the narcissist won’t miss a beat.

When they spot this self-abandonment within you, they will start ripping other boundaries down too.

And make no mistake.

They won’t stop.

But go back to the first sentence of this section…

The closer the narcissist gets to your heart.

The temptation they give you so that you freely do this is beyond toxic to me. It’s a completely false sense of security that you live in, and how that remains alive is down to how powerfully you’re pulled into their energy.

I know it seems so easy to say, but giving yourself fully to somebody without logically considering moving too fast or too intense is only going to end in disaster.

It’s tempting when they come along and make you feel so special, but that’s where the toxicity thrives. 

It’s false. 

Stop Trying to Change Them

It’s equally important to try not to change the narcissist, as tempting as it may be. I have said this probably hundreds of times to various people in my life, but I will write it for you:

It is not your responsibility to improve the traits of others. You cannot redeem somebody else’s bad behavior through your own self.

Narcissists don’t put in work

Hold Back On Your Heart

It’s so easy, isn’t it? The narcissist looks at you with their lovelorn eyes and listens to every single word you have to say.

Before you know it, you have shared and overshared everything within the first few weeks, even days after you have known them.

Feeling heard may not be something you’re used to experiencing, and as you do, those voids you’ve lived with forever are beginning to fill.

You know the ones:

• Having to fight for somebody’s attention
• Feeling neglected growing up or in the more recent past
• Feeling low in self-esteem and self-confidence
• Feeling as though your voice doesn’t matter

Now, suddenly, it does. And you love sharing all your secrets and vulnerabilities with somebody falling head over heels for you.

You feel the same, I bet!

There comes a point, though, where everything you disclose will be used against you. The narcissist will remember it all so that someday, someday, they can break you in those exact ways.

It’s tempting to sound off and pour out your heart – but I advise you seriously – don’t.

The Waiting Game: Pointless

I’ll keep this one short…

…Stop waiting for the narcissist to change!

Unlike trying to change them, you simply wait for their promises to turn into action.

They won’t.

They never have, they never will.

It’s Tempting to Blame Yourself!

We need to have a serious conversation if you are really blaming yourself for all of this. 

What am I doing wrong?

Why do I keep making them cross?

Why can’t I just do what they ask, and this would never happen.

No!

Narcissists move goalposts for this reason – so you’re never right, and nothing is ever good enough!

Don’t be tempted to blame yourself for their toxic traits. They were born that way, and they will likely die that way. 

That’s not on you.

Goodbye To Second Chances

I promise I’ll be better.

I’ve changed.

I’ll do better.

I know myself more now.

Don’t ever imagine giving the narcissist a second chance will result in a brand new chapter for you.

They have not reflected.

They will never establish blame.

The temptation exists because you still feel attached to whatever they brought to the table – albeit temporarily and falsely. 

Say goodbye to second chances, and give yourself a new lease of life.

8 Silly Mistakes Narcissists Make

Believe it or not, narcissists make mistakes every single day.

Just when you thought you believed the perfect image they portrayed, you’re starting to see through the cracks.

Oh, what fun that is!

Now, to see through those cracks, all you need is a little insight into what really happens when narcissists create huge errors for all to see.

And believe me, they can get very silly!

You Think They Are Perfect… So Do They!

When somebody presents you with this perfect image of themselves, it’s easy to believe it all the while those rose-tinted glasses are on. When you don’t see a fault, it won’t even cross your mind that they are less than the whole package. 

A narcissist will do this well because they don’t want you to see all the ways they’re actually as insecure as they are toxic. 

It’s like a show, right?

The show starts, and everybody takes a seat and watches the actors on stage. You don’t know what the actors are really like because you’re seeing them play a role; a character. 

It’s the same with all narcissists. They welcome you to your seat, and show you what you came to see. 

Eventually, that show is going to have to end. I mean, nobody can continuously act like that without their real character starting to come through.

The Horror!

It’s always a horror to the narcissist when they make a mistake. When something happens, you get to see the version of themselves that holds no color and no warmth. That’s when you realize what a facade it all is.

Catching them fail to be perfect means you have seen the real person behind the pretense. Furthermore, they are reminded in that single moment that they have faults.

8 Silly Mistakes Narcissists Make

Hey, don’t be surprised if you recognize your own situation in every single one of these points!

#1 They Are So Predictable!

The longer you get to know a narcissist, the more you can start to see patterns in their behavior.

You know at the family party, they’re going to turn up and cause some kind of discomfort. You learn to dread those gatherings, but more so, you find yourself preparing for them.

Psyching yourself up, or remembering all the times before they’ve passed comment or judgment, or made you the butt of jokes.

The way they can destroy an occasion is astounding – but they do it so frequently and similarly that you can now actually call them predictable.

#2 They Tell On Themselves

Oops, did the narcissist slip up? I think they may have! Narcissists only have to say one word or phrase for you to see or hear the slip up.

No, I’ve never spoken to them in my life.

Really? The same person I saw you with at the office last week?

I told you I didn’t want to go.

No. I have a text here from two weeks ago saying that you were looking forward to it.

Narcissists tell on themselves all the time, if you let them just fall into their own traps. Making it easy for them to do so gives you far more ammunition when it comes to fighting your half of the conflict. 

Narcissists only think they’re clever, but if you scratch beneath the surface, you’ll see them make mistake after mistake.

It’s hilarious!

#3 Confession Time!

A narcissist will tell you everything about themselves the second they start projecting onto you.

You’re so narcissistic! Stop trying to control everything!

Nobody likes you! You’re not worth their time.

You are so frustrating. I wish you’d learn to love yourself more!

When you are stuck in the midst of these kinds of comments, it’s hard to really understand them to be any other way than pure insults.

Once you learn about projection, you learn that narcissists use it to put everything they feel about themselves onto you so they don’t have to deal with it themselves.

This constant denial is hurtful at the time, because it seems as though you can’t do a thing right.

In actual fact – the mistake is the narcissist assuming you’re anywhere near as toxic as they are. 

#4 No Reason Anger

Shout, shout, shout.

Rah, rah, rah.

Noise, noise, noise.  

What’s it all for? Give me one good reason?

The narcissist can’t.

It’s anger for absolutely no reason, but it’s aimed at you to make you feel like you need to say sorry.

For what?

You didn’t do anything wrong.

When the narcissist becomes angry for no reason, they make the silly mistake of trying to lure people into the drama. 

Some will fall for it, yes. Once you start awakening to narcissist abuse, you will probably find yourself walking away and shaking your head.

Because it’s just not worth it. 

#5 They Underestimate You

Underestimating you is a huge mistake. Imagine thinking that you can’t do a fraction of the things you’re actually able to do – with ease!

Not only that, but this is also about character.

When a person wants to break you, they can take you to hell and back trying. If you remain steadfast in your response and do not let it get to you, you will end up being severely underestimated.

#6 They Don’t Commit To The Change They Promise

This is when you start to see the narcissist for who they really are.

Those promises made that are continuously broken will form a pattern for you. And no, it doesn’t work out the way you hope because that happens when hope fades to disappointment. 

You want somebody to commit to you, and love you for who you are. And all the ways they say they will be there for you to be true and followed through with.

You soon learn to not trust them, even though they are yearning for you to be faithful and stick by their side.

It’s too late when you open your eyes and see the narcissist, not the charmer!

#7 Believing They’re Perfect

This one almost makes me cringe.

Narcissists all believe they’re perfect. 

They adore themselves on the surface, and convince themselves that they have no flaws at all. 

That’s a lot to uphold, don’t you think? Especially when the mask can slip so easily…

#8 Believing What They Say is True

A narcissist’s voice is their favorite song. I’ll go one deeper than that:

A narcissist’s voice is their favorite ever sound. 

Nothing beats it.

They’re always right and believe anything they say is true. 

Nobody can convince them otherwise, and if you so much as question, then more fool you.

Well, actually, more fool them…

…One day they will be proven wrong, which will be their most embarrassing moment to date!