I know in your heart, you will love the kind of day that celebrates love and all that it entails. You want to use it to remind the person you’re with how important they are, but also, you want to receive that back, too.
You hope, you wish, you pray for a day that makes you feel whole, and you enter Valentine’s Day with positive anticipation for some quality, loving time together.
You won’t get it with a narcissist. They hate Valentine’s Day. These 9 reasons why, ought to prevent you from ever falling for a narcissist ever again.
#1 The pressure is on
Nothing panics a narcissist more than being put under any kind of pressure, least of all the kind that points towards needing to display some romantic tendencies.
Buy your lover the perfect meal for Valentine’s!
Give them the romantic weekend getaway they will never forget!
You can almost predict the horror of the narcissist, who never usually gives you a second thought, let alone romance in general.
Any egotistical character will hate having it forced upon them, and it never usually goes that well for the person who is waiting for the love to bloom on the big day.
#2 Vulnerability comes a knocking’
What is love?
It’s a beautiful display of how you feel about somebody special.
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For the narcissist, it’s nothing but a pathetic way to act weak.
I can’t be doing with all this love crap!
What a load of nonsense this is!
In other words:
I don’t want to have to be vulnerable in front of you, so please don’t make me.
Unfortunately, narcissists don’t get a say in what goes on the calendar, and Valentine’s Day will roll around eventually, whether they like it or not.
As a result, they tend to react to it in an arrogant, tough manner. They would rather that, than soften to the day and spend it doing nice things for the person they supposedly love!
#3 The price they have to pay … literally
Okay, this is where things can get pretty darn hilarious.
If you know narcissists, you know how obsessed they are with money.
I don’t just mean a little, I mean they fully loathe having to put their hands in their pockets, especially if there’s nothing in it for them.
Yes, they brag about money, and they will buy the most expensive items in order to be able to do that, but for you?!…
Not so much!
Have you seen the prices of these roses?
Are you expecting me to take you out and spend $400 on dinner just because it’s Valentine’s?
If you think corporate companies get to tell me when to buy jewelry, you can think again!
It’s not what you want to hear, but the truth is, narcissists don’t want to pay for romance, so Valentine’s Day becomes a least favorite Holiday for them.
#4 Needing to keep up with everybody else
If everybody else is doing it, the narcissist doesn’t want to be the only one who rejects or dismisses Valentine’s Day. It’s why they hate it so much; being forced to comply.
As much as it pains them to have to go out and get all the romantic gifts, the narcissist knows that if they don’t, they run the risk of looking like somebody who doesn’t care, or doesn’t want to celebrate love.
They need to uphold their image of a loving person, and so they go ahead and buy the goods – very reluctantly.
The only saving grace is that they can show off on social media and tell the world how loving they are.
We know it’s fake, guys!
#5 No excuses – they have to spend time with you
The whole day cannot be avoided, as much as the narcissist would love it if it were so.
There has to a point where they spend time with you, and I shudder at how childish this actually is, I mean, surely it’s nice to do something with the person you love.
Well, you and I think differently because we don’t have toxicity running through our veins.
The narcissist will hate that there are very few excuses to get them out of acknowledging the day at all, and this all boils down to losing control of the calendar.
Nothing for them is worse.
#6 Romance is painful to them
While narcissists are obsessed with physical intimacy, and being told how wonderful they are, when it comes to romance, it’s a different story.
Romance involves time. You listen, you appreciate, you are affectionate, gentle, kind and loving.
These aren’t attributes typically associated with narcissists, so yes, they will struggle on the day to begin to know where to start.
For this reason, when February 14th comes about ,they inhale sharply, and find the whole thing awkward.
As for you, this is what you want! This is what you live for! You can’t wait to see what romantic things the narcissist has planned for you.
And that is why you will always be disappointed on the big day.
#7 They can’t cancel the day
Oh dear. Sorry, narcissists worldwide, but Valentine’s Day is official.
It’s stamped, approved, and marketed in a big way, and you won’t even be able to head into your local fuel station without seeing heart-shaped fluffy toys and overly-packaged roses spilling out of the aisles for your attention.
You can’t cancel it. You can’t tell a Saint that he doesn’t get to have his day, and that’s tough for narcissists everywhere.
This boils down to control again, and not being able to shape the narrative of life when it throws these days at you.
Sure, they can treat you how they want to treat you, but the truth always remains:
Valentine’s Day is Valentine’s Day.
#8 It’s about how special you are, not them
Oh, this one is a biggy! If a narcissist could buy themselves a card and a box of chocolates, they would.
They love to make every day become about how special they are, and how much they love themselves.
But you? You’re a mere peasant! You’re a boulder in their path of glory! They don’t want to have to make it about you!
I love you so much.
This is how much I love you!
I can’t believe how lucky I am!
Can you imagine anything more hilarious? Narcissists hate making any day, occasion or event about you or anybody else for that matter, and it’s a huge reason why they hate Valentine’s.
#9 Valentine’s triggers their insecurities
I don’t care how much they would argue against it, Valentine’s Day triggers all the fears and insecurities of the narcissists.
They know they are just a moment away from being abandoned at all times, which is why they lure you in with such strong love and trauma-bonding.
They are wildly insecure about themselves, even if they will never admit it.
That’s why Valentine’s Day can act as a huge trigger for them. Being forced to talk about or express any kind of love sends shivers down their spine, and they would rather just close their eyes and wait for the 15th to roll around.
