Last Updated on May 30, 2022 by Alexander Burgemeester
You know you like him. You know that you enjoy teasing him and flirting whenever you can. Now, it’s just a matter of really showing him what he’s missing out on.
There are many ways to attract someone, but sending flirty text messages can be one of the easiest ways to make a guy even more interested in you.
It’s also fun, carefree, and incredibly low-maintenance. Once you know what you’re doing, you can learn how to use the right words to really drive him wild.
Here’s everything you need to know about how to make a guy chase you over text.
How Do I Get Him to Chase Me Over Text?
What’s the difference between friendly texts and flirty texts? How do I let him I’m into him without revealing too much interest? I want to show him my authentic self, but I also know that men love when things get mysterious and seductive. Better yet, how do I make him chase me?
If you’re asking yourself these questions, you’re on the right track! It’s clear that you want to send texts that will make him chase you- without worrying if he’ll lose interest. It can be a delicate balance, especially if you two are just getting to know each other.
If you want to know the texts that will make him want you, here are a few essential considerations to keep in mind.
Reading Suggestion: 250 Questions To Ask Your Crush While Texting
Don’t Always Be Readily Available
It doesn’t matter how free your schedule is (or isn’t). You shouldn’t be responding the moment you receive a text from him. Doing so can make you appear desperate, and it can also make it look like you have nothing else going on in life. Nobody finds these traits attractive.
Instead, be casual. Don’t always have your phone on you. If you feel the urge to compulsively check if he responded after you sent a message, set a timer for five or ten minutes. Do something else until the time is up.
The chase lies in him knowing that you aren’t always there he wants you to be there. If he’s interested, he may work even harder to grab your attention!
Don’t Bombard Him
Nobody wants to feel overwhelmed when they look at their phone. If he sees endless messages from you, he’s probably going to feel annoyed (rather than intrigued).
So, avoid sending him long paragraphs of back-to-back text. If you ask him a question, wait until he responds before sending another one. If it feels like he’s being short with you, give it some time until you continue with the conversation.
Remember that people don’t want to feel smothered. He may be busy with other obligations. Or, he might still be testing to see if he’s interested in you. Either way, it’s important that you respect his need for space.
If you sense that you’re always the one initiating conversation, try to back off. Pause and see how he takes charge. If he doesn’t, it might mean he’s not as interested as you think he is.
Reading Suggestion: He Doesn’t Want a Relationship But Wants To Be Friends
Match How He Texts
Ideally, it’s a good idea to mirror his rhythm when it comes to your texting style. For example, if he tends to text you the most in the morning before work, that’s when you’ll want to be the most alert. If he likes sending you emojis, consider sending them back.
Of course, you don’t have to completely replicate his style (and doing so might be weird). But it can be helpful to observe his habits early in the relationship.
Less Can Be More
He’ll chase you more if you reveal less. Think about it. If he asks you about your day and you respond with every little detail, you don’t leave any room for his imagination. You have already provided him with all the essential information.
But if you’re a bit vaguer and respond with something like, It was a little stressful, but mostly good, you’re inviting him to wonder about what potentially made you feel stressed. If he cares about you, he’s definitely going to ask!
Of course, you shouldn’t be so vague that he feels like he can never get an accurate read on you. That can be its own subtle form of emotional manipulation, and most people find it exhaustive. Instead, aim to strike the balance of being assertive while also leaving some room for questions!
Reading Suggestion: 30 Big Signs a Guy is Flirting With You
The Best 9 Texts to Get Him Chasing You
When you text a guy, you ultimately want to make him feel appreciated. Believe it or not, men love playing flirtatious texting games. They have no problem chasing after what they want, particularly if you know how to make them feel good in the meantime.
Here is how to make a guy chase you by text.
“I can’t stop thinking about last night.”
Did you two go on a special date? Did things get heated in the bedroom? Were you feeling more connected than usual?
If so, nothing feeds a man’s ego more than him knowing he’s on your mind.
This kind of text is direct (it shows that you clearly had a good time). But it also opens the door to see how he interpreted things. His response can be quite telling.
If he says something like Me too. Can’t wait to see you again, you have the green light that he’s definitely interested!
And don’t be afraid to be specific in sharing what exactly you can’t stop thinking about. Providing details lets him know what you specifically enjoyed, increasing the chance that he will want to do it again and again.
Reading Suggestion: 15 Warning Signs of a Player
“I had a really interesting dream last night.”
Sending him this text almost guarantees that you’ll receive a follow-up question like, what kind of dream? What happened? Do you want to tell me about it?
Basically, by sending him this text, you’re setting the stage for his wheels to start spinning (in the best way possible).
Of course, you don’t want to share just a generic, boring dream!
Save this text for when you really dreamed about something juicy, strange, or intriguing. He’ll certainly want to know more, and he may even respond by sharing his dreams with you.
“You would love what I’m wearing right now.”
We all know that men are visual creatures. It’s no secret that a guy likes to admire a beautiful woman.
This is the kind of innocent, flirty text he’ll find irresistible. First, he’ll start imagining what you’re wearing (or what you look like when you’re not wearing anything at all).
But then, he’ll likely feel prompted to ask you about your outfit. He’ll probably do this by asking you what you’re wearing or requesting that you send a picture.
If you do send a picture, don’t be afraid to tease him. For example, if you’re wearing a new dress, maybe only send him just one part of your body (like your legs). If he likes what he sees, he’ll definitely want more visual cues!
Of course, you can draw out the chase by telling him that he’ll have to wait until he sees you in person. If he lives near you, there’s a good chance he’ll want to come over right away!
Reading Suggestion: 99 Flirty Texts To Make Him Obsessed
“I’m just trying to figure out my weekend plans.”
This is a great text to send him if he asks you what’s up or if wants to know what you’re doing. This text shows that you’re busy (a good thing!). It also shows that you value planning and keeping your social calendar full (which may even make him feel a little jealous).
It also creates room for more questions.
Oh, what are you thinking about doing? Do you have any time for me? What does your Saturday look like so far?
And those are the kinds of inviting questions you probably want to receive!
“I have a great story to tell you when I see you next.”
Anytime you drop the line, when I see you next, you’re going to stir his curiosity. What kind of story is it? And what makes it so interesting that you want to wait until you’re in person to tell him?
You’re also going to make him want to pin down a time and date for when he can actually see you again! That hopefully motivates him to ask you about your future plans.
He might react to this text by asking you if you’ll tell him now- or if you two can Facetime. That’s totally up to you, but remember that it keeps things fresh and exciting if you save some things for when you’re physically together.
After all, texting is fun, but you probably don’t want your entire relationship to exist solely through technology.
“You’ll never guess what I did today.”
Even if they don’t realize it, guys love it when you sometimes act out-of-character. It shows that you have a novel side and that he still has a lot to learn about who you are. This makes you come across as even more intriguing!
In addition, this kind of text inevitably leaves him hanging. He has no choice but to feel compelled to ask you what you did!
And so, this is a great text to send if you did something bold, scary, or unusual. It’s also perfect for sending if you sense a lull in the conversation and want to spice things up a bit.
Reading Suggestion: 28 Signs He Wants To Be Your Boyfriend
“I’m going to play hooky tomorrow. Wanna join?”
Letting him know that you intend to miss school or work tomorrow opens a world of possibilities. How will you spend your free time? Better yet, you’re now inviting him to join you on this special day. Will he eagerly accept your request?
This kind of text is seductive enough without being directly over the top. It shows that you have a fun and spontaneous time. But it also shows that you clearly want to share that fun and spontaneity with him- you don’t want to just spend your time alone!
Most guys will jump at the opportunity to join you on your free day. If he can’t, there’s a good chance he’ll definitely want to reschedule.
“I have a surprise for you!”
Think about how you would feel if you received this text. Excited? Curious? Desperate for answers? A little bit of all of the above?
We’re wired to want to know answers, so when we know that a surprise is around the corner, we start focusing on it! And that keeps you on his mind.
Remember that a good surprise can be anything. It can simply be you finding his favorite discontinued snack at a random grocery store. It can be you having coffee or lunch delivered during a stressful day at work. It can also be you just showing up unannounced one night!
You should try to tailor your surprises based on his interests and current circumstances. For example, if he’s stressed with work and has a huge project coming up, it isn’t helpful to book a surprise getaway in the middle of the week. But it definitely could be beneficial to plan a couples massage over the weekend.
“I’m trying to fall asleep, but I’m really horny right now.”
If you really feel ready to take things up a notch, don’t be afraid to get a little raunchy. Seductive texts can quickly transform a benign conversation into a wild one.
Some guys will respond to this text with humor or clarification. They don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable, so they will test the waters with a generic haha, or oh, are you?
Once they know your intentions, they might match your flirting by asking what you plan to do next. This, of course, may lead to anything from him wanting you to touch yourself to phone sex to him coming over right then and there!
Of course, you should check in with yourself before sending these kinds of texts. They’re inherently suggestive, and you don’t want them ending up in the wrong hands. Make sure you really trust him before hitting send.
Reading Suggestion: 13 Reasons Why Guys Don’t Call When They Like You
What Texts Do Guys Like to Receive?
Nobody wants to receive a boring question or one-word response. More than anything, guys like to receive texts that make them feel special. They also tend to like texts that make them feel challenged- like they’re in a bit of a friendly competition with you.
Don’t hesitate to show your silly side when you interact with him. Guys love someone who can laugh at themselves and not take life too seriously. They also love when you can engage in friendly banter, as it allows them to put their guard down, too.
Funny texts can include anything from gently teasing him to sending funny memes that make you think of him. Funny texts can also include referencing shared inside jokes or making fun of a situation that you both found ridiculous.
‘Missing You’ Texts
Even if they don’t always show it, men get insecure, too! They often doubt whether women really like them, and it’s normal for them to question everything from their appearance to their personality.
Sending him a simple, I miss you, may be the easiest way to make his day. It’s direct and to the point and lets him know that you care about him. What guy doesn’t want that?
It’s no secre that most men love when you send selfies. This is especially true when the selfies are unprompted or come at random times.
They love being reminded of how beautiful you are! They also love knowing that you took time out of your day to take the picture and send it to them.
So, don’t think twice before snapping a picture of yourself with friends, working out, or even just spending time at home. If he cares about you, he wants to see proof of you as often as he can!
Reading Suggestion: Do Guys Cuddle With Just Any Girl?
‘This Makes Me Think of You’ Texts
Whether you’re sending him a link to an article he might enjoy or a photo of a place that reminds you of him, these kinds of texts are highly desirable. It shows him that he’s on your mind- right then and there. It also conveys that you actively think about him throughout the day!
If you send these kinds of texts, don’t be surprised if he sends them back to you. Once you’ve showed him this lighter side, he’ll probably be more inclined to loosen up as well.
‘How Are You Doing?’ Texts
Unfortunately, men don’t always feel like people support their emotions or needs. Many guys are used to bottling up how they feel. They often feel like they need to be strong and protect others, even if doing so neglects their own mental health.
Asking how he’s doing- and genuinely responding with care and compassion- shows that you care about him (even if things aren’t going well). It demonstrates your empathy and consideration for his well-being.
Remember, he might not open up to you right away. But the more you can be safe and consistent, the more you show him that you aren’t afraid of how he feels.
‘I Love Your ___’ Texts
All men love praise, even if they don’t acknowledge it. So, whether you’re telling him you love his laugh, apartment, or even the way he makes you pasta, anytime you use the word love, you’re conveying just how special he is to you.
These texts can be even more effective when you send them randomly. He will want to know what prompted the kind words- or he’ll just be completely flattered by your praise. Both of these outcomes are relatively positive!
Of course, you should strive to be as genuine as possible when sending this kind of text. If you claim you love everything, the word loses its merit. Instead, only use it when you truly mean it (but if you mean it often, don’t feel like you need to hold back, either!).
How to Respond to Text Messages From a Guy
Sending the right texts is one thing. What about knowing how to respond to messages in a way that still keeps him chasing for more?
Keep Things Simple
As mentioned, mirroring someone’s communication style tends to be best. So, if he only drops a line or two at a time, you should only drop a line or two in response.
That said, you can still be witty, compassionate, or even seductive in how you reply. Take some time to think about your answer before hitting send. One of the best parts of texting is that you can plan ahead to potentially avoid embarrassing moments!
Emojis are like their own language, and there’s no reason you shouldn’t use them when texting with someone. After all, we all know how powerful a simple winky-face or heart can be.
Just don’t overdo it. When a text actually needs a valid response, use your words (and not images). And don’t bombard someone with a dozen emojis in one text- doing so can come across as cluttered and even immature.
Keep Asking Questions
Nothing kills a conversation faster than you only responding to his questions. To keep things interactive, you need to be asking him questions as well!
So, if he asks about your day, feel free to respond about what happened. Then, after that, follow-up by asking about his day, too.
Remember that it’s best only to ask one question at a time. If you send him a long message full of questions, he may glaze over them altogether. Or, he might only respond to one or two, leaving you in the awkward position of deciding if you want to ask him again.
Don’t Feel Pressured to Commit
If he asks what you’re doing tonight, it’s perfectly reasonable to tell him you’re not sure. Or, if you’re still weighing your options, you might tell him exactly that.
Yes, he probably wants to see you. But no, you shouldn’t feel like you need to see him every time he asks. In fact, doing so may backfire, as it shows that you don’t really have much of a social life outside of him!
So, don’t be afraid to play it cool. Take the time you need to decide what you want to do before agreeing to any requests.
Reading Suggestion: THIS Is What a Guy is Thinking When He kisses You
When in doubt, don’t underestimate the power of a good compliment. We all love feeling like we’re special, and a quick compliment can dramatically boost his mood.
So, let him know how much you enjoyed spending time together the other day. Or, make it a point to highlight that you really like how he looks after his mom or takes care of his little brother.
Let Him Know When You’re Busy
It’s totally okay to respond to a guy while also letting him know that you’re in the middle of something. Doing so shows you that you care about him- but it also sends a clear message that you won’t just drop everything to talk.
There’s nothing wrong with making him feel just a little jealous! If he knows you’re out with friends or busy having a good time, he may realize he misses you more than he thought!
Keep Things Moving
If you’re trying to move away from just texting (because you want spend more time together), don’t just default to texting because it’s easy.
You can be direct by letting him know that you want to wait to tell him certain things when you’re together. Or, you can subtly ask him when he thinks he’s going to see you next.
Either way, it’s important that yoou recognize your relationship goals and make a plan for moving forward. You don’t want to get stuck in an annoying dynamic where you’re only flirting- only for nothing to progress beyond that.
More than anything, it’s important to be yourself when flirting with a guy. If you try to dramatically change who you are, this plan will only backfire.
You’ll either feel an enormous pressure to maintain this fake version of yourself. Or, you’ll risk confusing him once he finds out that you’re significantly different from how you present.
Being yourself means accepting who you are. If he likes you, he’ll want to know the real you. He’ll love when you flirt or play the occasional game, but he won’t want you to do any of that if it jeopardizes your true personality.
Reading Suggestion: Why Do Guys Hook Up With The Same Girl?
Chasing text messages can really motivate a guy to take things to the next level with you. As you start showing interest, he starts finding his own ways to show interest back! It’s important that you enjoy the process and try to avoid rushing things too quickly.
Remember that texting should feel fun and engaging. And now that you know the flirty 9 texts to get him chasing you, you should have some ideas for how you can brainstorm your next conversation.
Reading Suggestion: Dirty Questions To Ask Your Crush