Sorry, did you think narcissists were strong and powerful all of the time?

If you did, then you’ve come to the right place, and today’s lesson is firmly in session.

Narcissists aren’t strong at all – it’s all a show. If you believe them, you’ll believe anything.

The way they promote their pseudo-strength is to make you feel and look weak instead, but I can reveal the 7 things that instantly make them look weak.

If you’re ready, class starts in two seconds…

Weakness Can Be a Surprise

I know you assume the narcissist is always strong because they exert so much power – but that power isn’t good – and not all strength is positive. 

Indeed, weakness is a core trait of all narcissists, you just have to look below the surface to see what exactly causes them to be weak. 

And it might seem crazy – but trust me when I say – weaknesses can present themselves pretty darn quickly if you have an eye for spotting them. 

What do I mean by that, exactly?

Let’s look at that list, and you’ll find out. 

#1 Being Ignored

A narcissist is only really in their happy place when they are surrounded by people. Admirers. Strangers who are drawn to them. 

They love to stand and tell a story and get people hooked on what’s being said, or how it’s being delivered. 

They do not love being ignored, and it becomes a real weakness within them when they are. 

What you’re doing in your silence is telling them something huge.

That something is:

You know what? You just don’t really matter to me that much at the moment/any more. 

Or:

You know, I am just speaking with this person at the moment. I’ll catch up with you another time.

Or:

I’m just a little too busy to talk to you or reply right now. I will call you tonight.

These, and so many more. 

And they all cut like a knife.

Weakness central!

#2 Getting Called Out—Calmly

And you know, you don’t have to go in shouting and hollering. In fact, the calmer you are, the worse it will be for the narcissist.

Your calmness proves that you are not going to react based on what they say or do.

You’re balanced. You’re ready to take control of the situation back, and that’s a real winning sign for yourself (maybe not for them, but who cares?)

If you’re standing up and calling out a narcissist, you’re doing nothing but speaking truths that are overdue to be spoken. 

That’s where the narcissist falls down.

Their knees tremble, and they become weak under what you’ve said and done to them. 

You deserve to say it how it is, and they have punished you enough to actually hear you. 

And if they’re weak because of it?

Tough. 

#3 Someone Knowing the Truth About Them

This kind of downfall could happen because of some wild mistake or accident the narcissist walks into.

Being overheard is a good one, and I can tell you hundreds of accounts like this.

The narcissist is bullying or intimidating, and for once, it isn’t just the victim who happens to hear it. This kind of scenario can create merry hell, but it’s going to happen at some point or another.

If just one person other than you knows the truth, it’s all the validation you need for your own feelings and thoughts. 

The moment this happens, the narcissist becomes that little bit weaker. The more people who find out, the weaker they become. 

And yeah – it is pretty instant!

#4 Genuine Confidence

Genuine confidence is like a quiet, simmering pot of water just hanging out at the back of the hob. It doesn’t have anything to prove, and it’s doing its job quite nicely, thank you. 

Confident people aren’t loud or attention-seeking. That’s the whole point of confidence. It just is. Without the worry of what it looks like, or how it sounds.

Narcissists don’t own an ounce of this – not even a pinch. And because of that, the people who naturally do are a real threat to them, causing weakness throughout their minds and bodies.

They tend to avoid these kinds of people because they know they will never measure up to them.

Instead, they seek out the quiet and shy as people they assume will be impressed by them.

Pretty sad, huh?

#5 Losing Control of the Narrative

Narcissists love a dynamic. They like to literally draw out what they want for the people they know. It’s like they’ve written a show, and it’s the best show in the world, and they are casting for it.

You will play that part. This person they know will play that role, and so on.

If anybody dares to change the script, the narrative will totally change.

The narcissist tries to stay in control of all of that, but you know, they can’t control everything all of the time no matter how hard they try to. 

So what happens?

They’re made to feel instantly weak.

They cannot hold onto the narrative. They have to let go and let it be, and it’s an embarrassing reminder that they’re not as strong as they make out they are. 

Without the dynamics of the narcissist’s choice, everything falls apart and their world as they know and have built it, crumbles. 

Not your problem!

#6 Watching You Thrive Without Them

Thriving without a narcissist is always where you want to aim to be. And the road to it is long and hard.

There will be hiccups and slip ups along the way as you find yourself again – realizing you are worthy. 

Worthy of love, worth of having your dreams come true, worthy of achieving your goals.

Worthy of it all.

And then you go from merely surviving all this time, breathing in and out – to thriving. 

And it’s a beautiful thing, but my God, does it make the narcissist weak?

Absolutely! 

There’s no way they can maintain any kind of strength all the while you’re growing exponentially. 

And that’s exactly how you should be in your life. The main character. The one with all the self-love in the world. 

No person should be stopping you from being the best version of you possible, least of all somebody so unwilling to support you or see you for the wonderful person that you are. 

#7 Not Being Feared

What do you mean their plan isn’t working? They worked hard to make you feel intimidated by them, and now you’re telling me that you don’t feel an ounce of fear when you’re around them?

Listen. If you’ve got to the point where you don’t even flinch around a narcissist, then I applaud you.

That feeling in the pit of your stomach you can get when you know you’re about to run into one is the worst, and it can throw you off physiologically. 

Narcissists need to be feared in order to feel important. It’s one of the rules of real authority, isn’t it?

Fear that teacher who always shouts. Fear your boss who is always in some kind of mood. 

Fear the narcissist. 

If you don’t have it, then they can’t extract it from you. This is another way of holding back your own power and making them that little bit smaller than they want to be. 

Good for you!

DO THIS To Get Under The Skin Of a Narcissist

Have you ever wanted to get under a narcissist’s skin? Let me tell you, it’s easier than you think!

Narcissists thrive on control and being admired, but there are ways to break through their seemingly tough exterior. 

It’s actually pretty weak!

The key is understanding their weaknesses. Their fragile egos and need for validation lead to a huge fear of being exposed. 

Therefore, using the right tactics can disrupt their game and leave you to take back your power.

Ready to flip the script and watch them squirm?

#1 The Art of Staying Calm

While narcissists think the way to get somebody’s attention is to speak loudly and intimidate them – there’s a lot to be said for remaining calm and collected. Some might say there is an art to it.

Think about it. An argument begins, and you know it has nothing to do with you.

The narcissist entered the room in a certain mood, and was intent on creating noise and drama.

It goes against everything you believe in, yet there you are, experiencing it. 

What choice do you have?

Well, a lot, actually. You have a lot of choices. You can continue to play along and match the pitch. You can cry and allow them to see you being mentally drained before their eyes.

Or…

You can stay calm and let them rage and shout, knowing it has nothing to do with you. Yes, you’re the target, and nobody wants to be.

But…

You’re not the one who has to respond. Nobody does. 

Staying calm throws the narcissist into unfamiliar waters because they’re used to you acting differently.

They don’t have anything to bounce off, like they usually would. Your calm aura is like a door closing on them, and it really gets under their skin. 

Okay.

Uh-huh.

I hear you.

I’m listening, but I will not shout back at you.

I would really appreciate it if you could understand your shouting is not getting us anywhere. 

Staying calm like this is going to shut the narcissist down and pertain to the idea that noise and anger won’t get anybody anywhere.

Once they know they can’t rile you, the annoyance will lie in the new understanding that they can’t gain any supply from you this way. 

#2 Be Firm!

Well, no narcissists like firmness. 

Firmness usually means you have boundaries, and boundaries are something all narcissists hate. They can’t stand to be told which side of the line to stand.

They hate even knowing there is a line in the first place!

When somebody so toxic has been used to walking all over you, it will be a shock to them when you suddenly develop assertiveness.

You will be met with resistance when you lay down what you will no longer put up with. Remember, the narcissist is used to knowing a certain version of you. The version that says yes instead of no.

When you stop with one, and start with the other – you’re going to get right under their skin!

#3 Ignore Them: Refusing To Hand Over Supply

I don’t want you to think that ignoring them is the same as giving them the silent treatment. I don’t believe in treating toxic behavior with equal toxicity – because two wrongs don’t make a right. 

However…

Silence where noise once rested is a way of retaining dignity and class, which may previously have been reverted to supply for them regarding your emotions. 

#4 Stand in Your Truth

There’s really no better place to stand. In your truth, everything makes sense. It’s where you can stand, knowing you are giving it your all and believing in yourself fully. 

It’s where confidence starts to grow and you’ll find a more assertive version of yourself. 

For that very reason, standing in your truth even though the narcissist is trying hard to pull you out of it, is crucial.

#5 Grey Rock 

Have you ever heard of Grey Rock? I am sure by now that so many of you will know what I mean by it, but just in case, let’s get a briefing!

Grey rock is nothing. It means to give the narcissist as little, if anything at all, as possible. You hear them, and you want to respond, but instead, you choose to say, “Okay,” “Sure,” “Uh-huh.”

Your face is calm and emotionless, and there isn’t an ounce of feeling in your voice. 

Giving the narcissist the proverbial grey rock is how you retain your power and give them absolutely nothing to feed from.

Will they like it?

Absolutely not!

But the more you exude it, the smaller they will feel. 

For too long, the narcissist has provoked and triggered you.

It’s time for all of that to stop.

#6 Call Them Out – and Mean it

Hey. What you did back there was wrong. 

Do you realize how you treated that person? You act like you don’t even care.

It was your fault we were late. Even though you had the time written down, you still got here after everybody else. 

You’re trying to be mean to me, but it just won’t work. 

I see what you’re doing, and I want you to know that I don’t fall for it.

Anything where you can throw some assertive statements into the mix without getting sucked into an argument, you should be able to do.

Getting under the skin of a narcissist is how you make what they’re doing almost seem like something to belittle. Narcissists hate being caught out and hate being embarrassed even more!

#7 Start to Thrive Away From Them

If there’s one thing guaranteed to annoy a narcissist – it’s your independence. 

Oh, you’re going out?

Actually, yes I am. I am going out in this outfit, and I look fantastic. You aren’t going to stop me. 

Are you applying for that job? Isn’t it a little out of your reach?

Yes, I am applying for it because, guess what, I am qualified and skilled, and I want to get it.

Thrive. Don’t just thrive a little; thrive like you mean it!

#8 Play By Your Own Rules

It’s probably been a long time since you’ve picked up your copy of the rulebook, but it’s still there.

It may be a little dusty, but now you get to dampen it down and start acting as if you are the main character of your own life. 

Don’t ever let anybody, least of all a narcissist, dictate to you. 

Your rules equate to what you want from life and how you want to go out and fight for it all. 

This is not up for debate!