It’s no secret that a narcissist is never going to be relied upon for the big stuff.
The stuff that matters to you.
Being there on time.
Listening.
Being vulnerable.
Being loving.
Oh, but wait a second – they can be relied upon for other things.
In fact – you can always rely on a narcissist to do these 6 things…
…They just may not be exactly what you had in mind.
Wait… Narcissists? Reliable?!
Okay. So before we set sail into this latest nugget of advice I have for you, I need you to know something.
You can never rely on a narcissist to do something good, or for you, or for anybody else. At least without condition, anyway.
Narcissists are some of the most unreliable people to grace this planet, and we share it with so many of them.
Now I’ve made this very important disclaimer, it’s even more important to represent the other side of that coin.
All is Not What You Think
As we flip to the darker side, it is my duty to tell you that there are a few things you can rely on them for. 6 Things actually – and no – none of them are going to be good for you.
Knowing these things can help you understand how narcissists operate, and what they want from you.
6 Things You Can Absolutely Rely on a Narcissist To Do
I don’t want you to start getting excited. This list isn’t going to be what you think it is. It doesn’t include miracles. It does, however, include some very harsh truths.
#1 Let You Down
I told you.
So yes, the first on my list is that you can absolutely rely on a narcissist to let you down.
When it matters to you, it won’t matter to them.
When you need them to be there, they will fail to show, or cause so much stress until the very last minute before appearing by magic.
Narcissists are forever letting people down. They aren’t curious or caring about anybody else. What that does to the likes of you, is make you totally invisible in their eyes. You’re powerless too, because you can’t force somebody to show up or care.
So where does that leave you?
It leaves you feeling miserable, and longing for a connection with somebody who grants you that peace of mind and loyalty.
Somebody who sticks to their words and doesn’t let what you had planned fall through.
#2 Embarrass You
Being embarrassed by a narcissist is incredibly – well – embarrassing. They know just what to say to get you to feel terrible about yourself, or further lacking in confidence.
They do it because it exerts power over them in that moment, reminding you who is holding and controlling the strings.
Underneath that smug exterior lies a person so deeply insecure that they have to feel the need to do something extreme in order to feel better about themselves.
Believe me when I say – being embarrassed by them says way more about them than you.
#3 Betittle You
Hands up who has been previously belittled by a narcissist?
You’re worthless.
You’re so needy.
You are incredibly clingy.
Nobody would ever want you.
I’m wasting my time being with you.
You’re so insecure.
You know the kind of comments I mean, and sadly, I could go on forever.
Being belittled is a way of breaking down your character, and sending it to the ground in pieces. It’s hard to recover that kind of strength you had before you were ground down by the narcissist…
…But it isn’t impossible.
Narcissists belittle because it makes them feel better about themselves. They struggle with their own sense of self to the point where anybody who is sure of theirs has to be challenged.
So they challenge you. And they do so by making you feel small and irrelevant – two things they secretly feel about the reflection they see in the mirror.
#4 Trigger You
Renowned for wanting to cause you as much pain as possible with an innocent smile upon their face, narcissists will trigger you.
They do so because they learn to know you well, and everything that comes with you too.
What you hate, what you’ve been through, what your boundaries are – the narcissist will use it all against you eventually.
When you’re triggered, the narcissist will then blame you for responding so wildly, or play the victim in it all.
I try my best. I really didn’t mean to hurt you. I feel terrible, and I hate feeling this way.
Prepare for them to lay it all on thick, with your feelings erased completely.
#5 Create Drama
There’s nothing quite as satisfying to a narcissist than giving people an opportunity to slip into the drama they’ve personally created.
The reasons narcissists love drama to the extent they do is due to the fact that normal life is so boring to them.
It sounds childish, doesn’t it? Should we be back in high school?
Well – narcissists don’t grow up from that kind of era. They absolutely love to see people suffer, be in pain, and be responsive to what they personally try to manipulate.
Without drama, life is dull. Which, in the eyes of a narcissist, leaves them only with themselves.
And therein lie the problem:
The narcissist hates themselves.
To the point you and I will never fathom. Their self-loathing comes from a place they were made to feel as a child. What they craved, they never received.
And so now it’s up to you to supply it.
Endlessly.
Caused by their drama.
#6 Cause Fallout
With every drama comes the inevitable falling out of people. Narcissists love to see fallouts. They do it because they have these wrapped visions in their minds of what they want the dynamics of people around them to be.
This person must not talk to that person. There’s too much threat there for me.
I’d like this person totally erased from the picture because they cause nothing but trouble for me.
I’d like these two to become a little closer because they’re both insecure.
She is far too strong-minded for my liking. They will have to fall out with my partner. I don’t want them putting ideas into their heads.
These little thoughts and ideas are always swirling around the narcissist’s head. It can be as quick as being at a party, and not wanting certain people to mingle or have too much fun together.
They can make you or somebody else jealous in a single moment, with the aim to cause the kind of fallout that the narcissist can easily walk away from and refuse to take any blame for.
