Not every hobby is as wholesome as it seems, especially when a narcissist is involved.
Beneath the surface of innocent pottery classes, book clubs, or charity runs lies a hidden agenda, for sure.
Attention, admiration, and image control.
Narcissists are experts at certain pastimes that make them look good, but it’s just a performance.
Here, I want to talk about 6 surprisingly everyday hobbies narcissists often adopt…
…Not for the joy, but for the show.
Keep reading to spot the signs.
To The Eye…
Hobbies are hobbies. They bring us joy, and what I like, you may not. That’s okay. We are all our own person, and we just do the things that make us happy because we can.
It doesn’t have to be a case of showing off about it, although we can celebrate who we are.
I think that’s the main difference here, plus the huge fact that some people curate an image based on what they like because it’s a certain thing.
And so – if you show off what you love to do to pass time – people will build an image about you in their heads and use that to decide what type of person you are.
Good hobbies? Good person!
But we know that’s not always the case, is it?
#1 Yoga or Meditation
Spirituality is important to so many people, myself included. While I may not practice it every day, I do try to use mindfulness as a tool, as well as meditation when there’s too much going on and I need to take a moment.
The same for yoga – it’s an ancient blend of relaxation and exercise, and it can really bring people back to themselves.
So, with all of that in mind – what is the obsession with narcissists adopting these hobbies?
I know for a fact it isn’t about them connecting with themselves or appreciating anything remotely related to real self-improvement/reflection.
Just because you practice kindness – doesn’t mean you are kind.
#2 Volunteering
Helping out your community is really one of the best ways to give back. If you have the time, you can make a world of difference to the lives of others.
People shouldn’t do it to look good, or to boost their image, though. It takes away the essence of what it means to be selfless, and it distracts from what you’re volunteering for.
Narcissists really love to volunteer where they can. They treat it like it’s a real hobby of theirs, but really, it’s an excuse to show people how thoughtful, compassionate and kind they are.
Except it’s not who they are at all. It’s who they want to be, and who they want you to think exists.
I cannot stand seeing holier than thou, egotistical losers stand up and show the world the good they do, when behind closed doors, they’re more damaging than you’d ever believe.
#3 Art or Photography
Any kind of art, including photography, is a way for anybody to express themselves.
It’s creative, fun, and with beautiful, interesting concepts and results that appear. I personally am not a dab hand at art, but many people are – and genuinely so.
Narcissists aren’t. They think they are, as they wave their latest book on the French Renaissance over their heads for everybody to see.
Look at what I know.
Listen to all the galleries I’ve been to.
Look at what I photographed on vacation.
The light is just totally mesmerizing.
And I hate to generalize, because there are genuinely people out there who have passions for the arts.
I wish I could say the same for narcissists. Nothing about their hobbies is normal or natural, and they’re nearly always out to look intelligent and full of creativity and vulnerability when in fact- they’re just hideous.
#4 Cooking or Baking
I’m not going to start pointing fingers at any celebrities I can compare this point to, but I will say how narcissists love to elevate their meals to impress others.
It;s not enough to just serve a meal, or bake a recipe. Narcissists have to take it to the next level to prove not just their knowledge, but their passion all in one go.
A lasagne has that extra something in it, or the ingredients and all homegrown and spoken about constantly as you chew on each bite.
The recipe comes from the latest huge public person, but it has been twisted in a way that the narcissist makes it their own – a dash of this, or an extra 50g of that to make it really perfect.
Because – you know – professional chefs have no idea what they’re doing, right…?
Cooking and baking is a hobby that most of us enjoy at some point or another.
Even if it’s that weekly wood oven pizza night we have as a family out on the decking, it’s to be celebrated and enjoyed.
Narcissists, like always, just want to take it to another level all the time. And they do!
And for you, the person who just wants to sit and eat, you have to hear about where the food came from, how much it cost, everything there is to know about the history of it, and how difficult and complex it was to either get hold of, or cook to perfection.
The narcissist may as well scream:
I want you to like me! Tell me you like me!
#5 Fitness Enthusiast
Listen – if it draws attention to them, the narcissist will write their name all over it. Fitness is no exception from these innocent hobbies.
What is more showy-offy than somebody working out and taking constant photos or videos of these gym sessions or success?
And yeah, it’s nice to know they’re taking care of themselves, but do we really need to see every single little detail of their journey?
No, we don’t.
From lifting weights, or running on the treadmill, narcissists want to perfect they way they look because they assume we are too dumb to know the difference between looks and personality.
We do.
And you can look your best self, while still being an absolute piece of shit.
#6 Traveling
There is nothing more tiresome than hearing the latest place the narcissist has visited on their travels.
Let me be clear – it’s amazing to travel. See the world, experience cultures, meet people, learn languages – it all adds to an enriching life.
But we don’t need to hear you bragging.
We don’t care that you got lost in the sands of Morocco. We don’t care that you plane hopped your way around Southern America on a quest to ‘find yourself.’
Travelling the world isn’t new any more. It’s become so easy to connect to each other through the art of fast transportation, and great connections.
And sure, it’s lovely to know that people are getting out there and seeing the beauty it has to offer…
…But quit showing off about it. We get it. You now have friends on every single continent, and I’m sure you swapped email addresses with the Polar Bears of Antarctica.
You’re fantastic…. whatever.
