You might think of ‘savage’ as being coldly -yet verbally – cruel. The words you say, the level of which you speak them at, or the screaming at them when they corner you for that reaction.
It’s none of those things. Savage can be quiet. It can be calculated. It can be the best thing you do.
And if you get it right? Well, let’s just say this: you will humiliate the narcissist like never before.
Here are 5 ways you can do that immediately with the narcissist you know.
#1 Stop reacting
Upon first thought, you might think, “How savage can not reacting be?”
You’re right to ask. Normally it shouldn’t be that much of a big deal that you refuse to get caught up in drama.
Step away, refuse to give what you’d normally give, and leave the table with your dignity intact.
This is a little more.
This is about being brutal with your silence.
We all need air to breathe, but the narcissist is nothing without your supply.
You give that to them in so many tiny ways that you probably don’t even realize, and your reactions are one of those ways.
When you cry, they smile.
When you beg, they ignore.
When you laugh, they condemn.
When you try, they laugh.
When you speak, they sigh.
But all of this, all of the different reactions you provide them, gives them comfort in the knowledge that they have got all the control over you.
They see that you care enough about them or whatever situation you’re in to give away organic reactions that prove you are entangled; even attached.
There is no greater humiliation than taking that power back. There’s no better way to tell somebody that they’re not the boss of you than to stop.
Changing like this is never the easiest choice to make, but it is the best one if you want to send them spiraling into a bucket of humiliation with no immediate way of getting out.
Popular Reads This Week (article continues below)
10 Disturbing Things Narcissists Do The Moment They Get Home
The day at home has been peaceful, with a thin layer of anxiety coating it. The peace comes from the narcissist being out, but there’s no mistaking that layer of anxiety is building up to their return. What to expect…
8 Creepy Things Narcissists Do at Night to Keep You Awake
Narcissists, above all else, are creepy people. I don’t say that lightly, in fact, I say it to warn you of exactly what they’re capable of when you aren’t looking. But when you are looking, when you’re lying awake at night…
THIS is How You trigger The Narcissists Breakdown
Everybody has a bad day, even narcissists. But a narcissist’s breakdown is so much stronger than things simply ‘not going their way.’ Narcissistic breakdown is where nothing can ever be the same for them again. I know it’s something many of…
#2 Start ignoring their bait
If you were to take a fishing trip with your friends or family, and set out on the boat for your various catches of the day, you’ll get lucky only because the fish will see your bait and bite it.
Without that bite, you will all come home at the end of the day with no bites, no fish, and no stories to tell.
The same applies to narcissists and their victims. If you see the bait, you have a choice.
You can either take a bite, and be hooked right where they want you, or you can swim on by and say, “Not today, you asshole.”
If they want to rage, you’ve got to let them. But that doesn’t mean you have to get involved yourself.
What would it all be for? The same dynamic over and over again, where they get to call the shots, and you sit in the backseat for the ride?
It’s time to humiliate them by getting into the driver’s seat and taking the controls. You get to drive where you want and in the direction that suits you.
You don’t need to say a word, but change gear and shift direction. This is enough to humiliate them and shrink their arrogant ego.
#3 Glow up quietly
This is most satisfying, and you know what? Nobody needs to know, especially the narcissist! What business is it of theirs anyway?
Listen, their sole mission in life is to make you miserable. It’s to erode your character, and replace it with fear and self-doubt.
They do it to anybody they meet who they know they can overstep with, and you are one of them.
But you can wake up and wise up to this, and defy it with all your might.
Nobody needs to be treated this way, and if your light is being dimmed, you’ve got the power and right to light it back up with a fierce spark of life and energy.
So what do you say?
Glow ups don’t have to just mean going out and getting your hair done (although if that’s what is important to you, then that’s exactly what it is).
This can also be about glowing up on the inside, and checking in with everything you’ve felt so lost in.
Use this time to quietly shift gears, and decide that for you, the only way to get yourself back is to go out searching for that person, and stopping at nothing.
So go for that job, tell yourself that you’re worth it. Take smaller steps, and drink more water every day to help your mind and body.
Whatever it is you want to do, do it without saying a word and let them watch you grow inexplicably.
#4 Set boundaries and give zero explanation
There’s absolutely no need to justify your reasons why you have boundaries, or want to implement them.
Why should you? This is your life and you don’t need to explain yourself to them, even though they will somehow be wanting to know what’s going on with you.
Why the change?
I should probably translate that to:
Why am I not getting away with stuff that I used to get away with all the time?
Life sucks, right?
Your boundaries are worth their weight in gold, and if you can see that, you should be able to live by them comfortably.
This isn’t about wanting to purposely punish the narcissist, it’s about reclaiming yourself.
They will of course be humiliated, because now they know they can’t to you.
They can’t walk all over you and take advantage. They can’t use you to feel good and watch you suffer.
And the more you implement those boundaries, the more addictive they become!
#5 When they expect to see you crumble, offer them a smile
Nothing will enrage a narcissist more, trust me. Your smile will take away the power they think they have to break you, and it will confuse them no end.
When a narcissist sets out to destroy you, they’re looking for patterns that are similar. Patterns they’ve grown used to seeing with you that fit the dynamics they’ve built.
When you take the prediction away, you leave them concerned, and facing a lot of uncertainty. What’s going on? Why aren’t you being triggered? Why is this not annoying or frustrating you like it usually is?
And I’ll be honest with you here, maybe it is. Maybe you want to scream on the inside and release all that pent up negative energy inside you.
But that doesn’t mean you should, or have to.
Instead, that silent smile will give nothing away, and it will shock the narcissist, who is relying on your pain and misery to get their daily dose of supply from you.
Crumbling in their presence means that whatever they did to make it happen, it was powerful enough to do so. Without that power, there’s really not a lot they are able to hold onto, which is golden for you.
So smile like you mean it, as The Killers say, and let them know nothing about how you really feel.
Would you like to read more?
What Eventually Happens To Narcissists? –
How Does it End For Narcissists? Narcissists are like a really painful, long book that you have to read to understand. They don’t come with an index or bullet points. If they did, half their toxicity would fall through the…
What Is the Root Cause of Narcissism?
If narcissism were a tree, today, I want to dig up the roots and expose them. I want to do this because narcissism isn’t just what you see and experience, it’s a personality disorder that has somehow become real in…
When Narcissists Know You Know
Hold your nerve! The narcissist knows, you know. They’ve got wind of your knowledge. Maybe it was a look you gave them or an indifferent reaction where they hoped for fireworks. You know. They begin to panic. The sweat beads…
