Define normal?
Okay. Normal in this context is how we go about our days in a fashion that isn’t out of the ordinary. It’s how we bounce from moment to moment without a big deal made in between.
That is normal.
It’s how we live that is somehow unacceptable to the narcissist…
…To the point where they are driven nuts.
So – I’ve got five things that drive narcissists nuts that I just had to share with you.
What’s Normal To You…
Life is normal, and all the ups and downs that go with it.
From the good to the bad, whatever you experience is likely to be akin to the normal goings on we all go through.
Narcissists aren’t really fans of normal. They try everyday to make theirs extraordinary.
They can’t do that if you are in a place of normal that is actually working for you.
You’ll see what I mean when you read on!
Welcome To Narcissism!
I’d rather not be welcoming you at all, but sadly, narcissists are everywhere.
Seeing as there’s not much we can do about their presence, we can control how they encroach on our space, if at all.
Starting by looking at all the egotistical ways the normal things can drive them nuts is a good place to start!
#1 Your Happiness
What is it about narcissists that hate happiness?
With a positive trait coming so naturally to you, it’s hard to imagine a person disliking you glowing up, and showing up for yourself.
Happiness comes in different shapes and forms. Sometimes it looks like getting a new job, or enjoying a vacation.
Other times, it can be as simple as getting up and watching the sun rise and setting out your day’s plans.
So, what’s the problem?
The problem is the narcissist not being able to be happy. Not truly. I mean, you think they are because they seem to smile and laugh and brag about their lives.
But is that happiness? Can they be really comfortable in this emotion?
The truth, and short answer, is no. In order to be happy, you have to let your guard down. And for that, you have to allow yourself to be vulnerable.
Don’t ever expect a narcissist to be able to do any of that. What this does is only teach others that they aren’t perfect.
The image they’ve built is worth way more than a moment of softness.
#2 Your Success
When you’re winning, expect the narcissist to be following you like a black cloud trying to take it all away.
You won’t necessarily notice them, nor will anybody else, but they’re constantly working behind the scenes.
When you succeed and achieve something – be it big or small – prepare.
Well, I mean it’s not like you solved world peace or anything.
If you think it’s important, then good for you.
At least you’re doing something with your life, finally.
These kinds of smart comments are unnecessary. They serve to do nothing but make you feel bad in your moment of glory and pride.
But guess what? Underneath those comments is a person jealous of you and the attention your success is getting.
Moreso, they are raging that you are building a positive image for yourself, when they are perhaps not (as much as they talk the talk, that is).
Nobody should downplay your success, and if it drives the narcissist nuts, well, so what?
#3 Not Hearing News First
It seems to me that narcissists feel entitled to know everything first. They want to be the person to break the news and create a storm of chatter around them as they announce what’s going on.
If that isn’t them, they will go absolutely crazy.
Why didn’t I know about this?
Why wasn’t I informed?
Why did they tell you first, and not me?
How do you know this?
If it’s you with the exciting news, they may even try to deny your reality by gaslighting you, with phrases like:
I don’t think you’ve got that right.
You seem confused.
This can’t be true. I’d know if it was.
This is a prime example of narcissists assuming the world revolves around them.
Who died and crowned them the King or Queen of Importance?
Nobody!
#4 Having a Hobby
Stop everything!
You have a hobby?
What is it, something dumb like painting, or writing? Do you run like a toddler, or something?
Maybe you’re one of these sad people who likes to go for nature walks, or meditate.
Pah. How pathetic are you?
…Sounds like something you’ve heard before? Yeah. I tried my best to emulate the kinds of things a narcissist might say about your hobbies.
It didn’t feel good to even pretend, but narcissists feel great when they’re putting you down.
Behind that surface lies a very negative person who is driven nuts by your love and passion that you try to maintain in your daily life.
Hobbies are great, and they keep us aligned with who we are and what we want from life.
They help us switch off, or relax after a a hard day. People look forward to pulling their hobby out and using it to unwind and introduce a little balance back into the fold.
If the narcissist sees you having too much fun, their natural inclination is to stop it.
They don’t want to see you happy. Your happiness is their supply, so they won’t hesitate in taking it from you to make you more miserable.
#5 Standing Up For Yourself
Oh no you didn’t! Well, if you did stand up for yourself, I can only applaud you.
You deserve to own the moment you’re in and be counted. Self-defence isn’t just about learning ninja moves in a weekly class to keep you safe walking home at night.
Self-defence is also:
I did not say that.
I refuse to accept your version of reality, when mine is completely different.
You don’t get to talk to me like that.
If you start to shout, I am going to leave the conversation.
I will not enter into this debate. We’ve been here before.
You can say what you want to say, I am going anyway.
I cannot express enough how the narcissist is driven nuts by statements like these. Statements that allow you the space to be you, and to own it.
And it’s anormal, right? If you’ve been treated unfairly, you have the right to stand up and say your piece, even if others aren’t going to like it.
This is no different, and it should always be something you strive to do.
