There are some of you out there who may have fantasies about celebrity crushes.
From Kevin de Bruyne to George Clooney – your taste will creep into your mind from time to time, and that’s okay. You’re human.
What I want to focus on today is a world away from your celebrity crush, and look more into really quite disturbing fantasies narcissists have.
I don’t want to worry you, but if you know a narcissist, you can be sure some of these apply.
Just the Start
What a perfect person I’ve met.
When your life begins with a narcissist, there’s going to be a variety of thoughts running through your mind.
I am so in love.
This is all I ever hoped for.
This is too good to be true.
That last point? Yeah. That’s where I want to lay it down because it is too good to be true.
Don’t think for a second that the charming person you’ve met is going to be in it for the honest and loyal long run, because they aren’t going to be.
Underneath this pretense is a motive, and that motive is fuelled and carried by fantasies that you won’t even be able to comprehend.
That’s because you’re the good person, and they’re the troubled soul.
#1 Public Adoration – 100%
While you’re heading off to bed thinking about the day you had, or the nice meal you’ve arranged with friends the next evening, narcissists are doing something completely different.
They will lay their head down and fantasize about being loved by everybody.
Not just a little bit, but A LOT. It’s not even enough that they think they’re better than everyone else – it can actually get incredibly specific.
I imagine a life where I am CEO and everybody has to do as I say. Then I get a work award at the end of the year and people from afar grow to know and love me and think how innovative and successful I am.
Imagine I put my company forward as a sponsor for the local soccer team, and I am able to use my knowledge and skills to help build and craft the perfect team who get to the top of the league and get promoted. All because of me.
The most concerning part of all of this is that there are real narcissists in the world having these kinds of fantasies.
They love it. They dream about it. And I think it is really disturbing because it’s putting themselves at the root of all success, rather than anybody else that might be behind it.
Or as I like to call it – delusional.
#2 Crushing an Enemy: Rivals Are a No-No
Have you ever seen a narcissist around one of their enemies? Okay, well here’s how it goes.
And I challenge you to think about what you might think it looks like before you read any further.
Do you think they will want to yell? Fight? Assert their authority?
Think again.
Narcissists are nothing like this around their rivals. Rivals instead worry the narcissist .There is real fear that somebody equal to them is going to overtake them.
They go quiet. They sit and rage inwardly. They refuse to act like there’s an issue, but instead scowl or steam their way through the situation.
So why do you think it’s such a disturbing fantasy behind closed doors that they actually crush them at something? Because they know it’ll never happen in real life!
The key aspect of narcissism that they’ll never admit is that they’re very fearful of rejection, and that they want to be the best.
But remember, they’re actually very insecure and self-loathing people. So any kind of confrontation is only going to happen in their wildest dreams.
#3 Infinite Wealth and Zero Work
Think of everything I could do with infinite wealth, and no work.
I could travel the world.
Where would I own property?
What cars would I have?
I’d have to have my own private jet.
I’d have people working for me.
I wouldn’t do a thing.
The pools…
The clothes…
The watches…
Now hear me out, because I will hold my hands up and admit I’ve wondered what it’d be like to win the lottery.
I’ve wondered what it’d be like to step inside a private jet, but these are all wishful thinking forms of curiosity that I certainly don’t obsess over.
Narcissist’s do. To the point where it really is disturbing as they almost believe that’s the life they already live.
They act like they’re that important, when the truth is, they’re just like you and me.
Money is probably the one concept the narcissists think about every day, because money and status equal the image they’re looking to show off to the world.
Unfortunately, without that fantasy coming true, these are just detailed thoughts the narcissist will have as often as they can. And it’s a few steps above weird.
#4 The Perfect Puppet Partner
Narcissists want to control everything, but they know they can’t. So what do they do?
They head to fantasy land where everybody does everything they tell them to all of the time, without question or fight back.
It’s part of a set of fantasies that mean nobody will ever find out the narcissist is as toxic as they are, it’s just about adhering to and obeying rules.
It’s a weird one, isn’t it? I mean who even wants that kind of power and control unless you’re a really sick person who gets off on treating people that way every single day?
The perfect puppet partner is the narcissist’s dream. Never any rejection, always using that person for their own mind games, and that person taking and taking and taking it like they’re an endless ball of supply.
I genuinely think this is pretty psychotic as fantasies go, and yet narcissists have these so regularly.
They live among us, people.
#5 The Most Dramatic Comeback Story
The narcissist fails to make friends, to get the job, to win people over, to come out as the victim.
They drop in popularity and they think it’s all over. They wonder what to do next, as the people in their world slowly turn on them.
Until, they pack up their car and drive to a new city, to start over. They pull up and as they’re unloading their car into their new property, a kind, attractive stranger stops and asks if they could use some help.
The narcissist cries and accepts their offer, and they talk about how the narcissist has been through so much and wants to just start again in a new place.
Before long, they’ve got a new circle of friends who see the narcissist as a noble, loving person.
The cycle starts all over again with people who the narcissist gets to manipulate and pit against each other, but only after they’ve got both feet under the table.
Yes – it’s a familiar story in the land of fantasies. The mind will create absolutely anything possible to make themselves feel and know that there’s always an escape plan, and that it will always work.
And trust me, narcissists love to live that out if they have no other choice.
