What was that? Who’s behind me? Are they talking about me? Have they figured me out? Why are they whispering?
As much as you think they don’t, narcissists are always assuming people have something to say about them behind their backs.
When you think about it, those with a guilty conscience always have one eye looking around them, while the other focuses on the lies and mistreatment.
For narcissists, it’s no different. In fact, I can think of 14 ways narcissists are paranoid. And I wanted to share them all with you.
The Insecurity is Strong
The paranoia that narcissists experience is at another level than you’ve ever known.
Reasons?
Where do I start?
There’s the obvious high insecurity. Narcissists are some of the most deeply insecure people out there, and they will look for anything that makes them uncomfortable and pin another notice onto it.
Then they fear exposure. Nobody can figure out the real them, because that would ruin their entire game plan.
And let’s not forget the assumption that everybody else is out to get them. For what, I will never know, but paranoia can and will show up in many different ways.
Let’s get into those.
#1 “What Are They Saying About Me?”
They aren’t saying anything… Are they?
Narcissists don’t trust others, and others should really trust them either.
That being said, the narcissist will always be wondering what those around them are saying about them, and it’s a sure fire way of highlighting exactly how insecure they really are.
#2 “They’re Trying to Ruin My Life!”
Who is trying to do what now?
I think you’ll find that nobody is trying to do such a thing. But far be it from a reasonable person to try to level with you, narcissist.
A lot comes to light when you see a person accuse another of trying to ruin their lives, especially when that person isn’t even trying to cause trouble.
Narcissists feel threatened. They can’t stand that kind of heat, so they do indeed, get right out of that kitchen while shouting and hollering.
#3 “Why Are They Being So Nice?”
Suspicious, much? Is it that unusual that somebody could possibly be nice to you, or is nice behavior in itself a reason to cast doubt?
You know, it is possible for someone to be friendly without having a motive, or wanting to use it to get what they want.
Narcissists think a certain way, and they assume everybody else thinks like that too.
So, if a person is being nice, they will see it as something not being right.
#4 “You’re Cheating!”
Why would anybody be cheating on you? Just because they’re talking to somebody else and you suspect foul play?
Not everybody is a cheater… Well… Except the narcissist, anyway.
This is exactly how a narcissist proves their deeply ingrained insecurity.
#5 “Phone Time”
What are they doing on their phone?
Why are they spending so much time on it?
What or who is so important on it that so much of their time is taken up?
Why are they more interesting than me right now?
It’s the same old story, isn’t it?
Yet it goes on and on, and really brings the paranoid side of the narcissist to life.
#6 “Where Have You Been?”
Do they need to know your every move? If they’re a paranoid Polly, they do.
Those at ease with their partners don’t need to keep such close tabs on them, and I say that with the most genuine of hearts.
It’s nice to care, and make sure they’re okay if they’re traveling or coming home late. That’s another thing.
This?
This is the worry that you’re having too much of a good time without them.
This is the concern that you’re speaking to people about the state of your relationship.
This is the major fear that you are exposing the narcissist, or finding somebody else.
It all boils down to their jealousy and insecurities.
#7 “I Saw On Your Socials”
What did you see? An innocent photo? A comment? A meme? Did somebody like your post? Do they feel threatened by this person?
To you, it’s innocent, because you’re innocent. For the narcissist, who is not of innocent mind or thought, there always has to be something else going on.
Pretty sad, I think you’ll agree.
#8 “You’ll Leave, I Know It”
The narcissist is all about perfection. They want to know that you’re happy in your relationship, even if all they do is make you miserable!
If they worry that you aren’t, they will also worry that you’re going to up and leave them.
And abandonment is a serious insecurity of the narcissist. I mean really.
#9 “Defensive? Me?”
When a person protests too much, there’s always an underlying issue going on.
What is it? I’d hedge all my bets on a guilty conscience!
Those who get defensive to this extent are just unable to regulate their emotions. Instead of talking through them, they shout over them.
And that protest? It’s all to do with being a little too paranoid.
#10 “Personal Details? Forget it”
If a moment occurs when the narcissist needs to give out their personal information, they always seem to be a little suspicious.
What are you going to do with it?
Why will this benefit me?
What will they find out about me?
These thoughts all tick along inside their minds, and that is nothing but breeding ground for a paranoid state of mind.
#11 “Enemies Are Always Watching”
Exactly how many enemies does a normal person have?!
Anybody in their right mind wouldn’t be assuming that they’re being surrounded by people who hate them, but narcissists somehow operate while looking over their shoulder.
I mean – if the shoe fits…
#12 “You’re Jealous and Trying To Sabotage”
The narrative that a person has to be jealous around a narcissist just because they’ve done something or bought something shiny, is so far wrong.
I couldn’t care less if any narcissists I knew got a brand new car. Mine works just fine.
If it’s what you want then good for you. But don’t assume I’m going to be jealous just so you can say you’re more successful and brilliant than me.
What sort of ego comes with this assumption?
A paranoid, narcissistic one.
#13 “These Rules Hold Me Back!”
If you ask a narcissist what they hate most, you’re bound to hear rules come up.
And they’re used as an excuse for those who aren’t progressing the way they want to in life.
Too many rules!
Too much restriction!
Or could it be that you’re overly paranoid about the rules and you’re just an average person like the rest of us?
#14 “If You’re Going to Cheat, I’ll Do It First”
The worry that you will eventually cheat is strong with narcissists.
Fearful that they will never be enough and eventually left will drive them to be the initiators in the disloyalty department.
Let them. At least you’ll know their true colors once and for all.
