How many times have you seen a jealous narcissist live in action?

Let me tell you – it’s not pretty. It’s pretty pathetic.

They act like petulant children, pulling any trick out of their narcissistic hat to get back at you for being a threat to them.

In fact, there are a lot of weird things narcissists do when they’re jealous. If you’re sitting comfortably, let’s start from the beginning.

You will never unsee these from now on!

Jealousy – Not Your Burden To Carry

Whenever a narcissist acts a certain way, you have to understand that this has nothing to do with you.

There are times they convince others wholly that they’re the problem.

All drama is caused by you.

Conflict has your name all over it.

The reason they’re pissed at you is because you acted up, or asked too many questions.

You didn’t support them, so they’re mad.

Jealousy is no different. The jealousy that derives from any narcissist is irrational and unhealthy, and yet they still refuse to carry it, so they pass it to you as soon as they can. 

They will do this in various ways, and that’s why we are here today. 

Before we do, please understand this:

The jealousy of the narcissist should in no way convert to your own burden.

Not ever.

#1 Silent Treatment

The silent treatment is a punishment.

In this instance, your punishment is that you (unknowingly) targeted the narcissist, and threatened them in some way.

Let’s cut to the chase here, because nobody should be so jealous that they actually stop talking to you.

Again – this isn’t a you problem. This is how the narcissist cannot rationalize what’s going on in their minds, so they resort to the easiest thing possible – stopping talking. 

All well and good to them, right? But what about you? You’re left wondering what the heck is going on.

How did it come to this? Why are they being quiet with you? Why has their refusal to talk become today’s priority for them?

Because whatever you’ve achieved, they want to squash.

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#2 Cutting Comments

You only got the job because barely anybody else applied.

I’m sure you were promoted because they felt sorry for you.

You don’t deserve a pay rise. You don’t even like your job.

I’m sure it’s fun to paint, but I don’t see a permanent income from what you do. You’re just not good enough. 

Comments such as these are designed to hurt you. Just when you’re having a good day and something amazing happens, along comes the narcissist to convert your color to black and white. 

#3 Start Talking About a “Friend” Suddenly

Hey, if you can have friends or good things going on, so can the narcissist!

Anything you can do, I can do better!

It’s going to be a game of who can win. The narcissist will turn blue in the face in order to beat you at this.

What they won’t do is tell you it’s because they’re jealous. 

#4 Sign Up To a Dating App

If you’re not giving them what they want, they will look for it elsewhere.

Narcissists, in their jealous rage, will ensure they feel like they’re getting revenge on you by hitting up total strangers. 

It’s a very irrational way to deal with emotions they simply cannot regulate – but that’s narcissists all over for you. 

#5 Sabotage Your Success

If you’re successful, they are going to have a problem.

Don’t you understand that the narcissist is the only person who is allowed to have good things happen to them?

If that person becomes you, then how are they to impress anybody? Where will the attention land?

Prepare for your success to be ruined by them. 

Failing to help you.

Not turning up at your event. 

Telling you that you’re useless.

These are all ways that potentially sabotage your success. 

#6 Be Late Or Refuse To Turn Up To Celebrations

If you’re about to celebrate some big news, you’re going to be buzzing for a get together like no other.

Finally, you passed that exam.

You got the keys to the house of your dreams.

You hit your target weight.

You did something worth remembering – and something worth partying for. 

And so, you arrange a time and place. Everybody shows up…

Everybody except the narcissist.

They text to say they can’t make it, if you’re lucky. Jealousy is usually more hurtful than this, and they will simply ghost you.

This leaves you abandoning your good news and trying to call them all night. 

Everybody asks why you’re distracted.

In truth – it’s them.

Every single time.

#7 Remind You That You’re Not All That

You’d better check yourself!

Don’t get too big for your boots!

Comments like this will come when one thing finally happens to you that is good.

How dare you take a day off from your usual low moods and confidence?!

#8 Push Out Your Insecurities – Back To Earth With a Thud

If you have something good going on, the narcissist will fight for your insecure self to return by dropping them at your feet.

Your smile is so gappy when you’re happy.

You really should work on looking better in your graduation photos.

I’m surprised you passed your test, seeing as you’re dyslexic.

Isn’t it disgusting the kinds of lengths narcissists will go to, to see the smile fade fast from your face?

#9 Out Rolls The Bad Advice

Narcissists want to see you fail.

As a result, they would love to throw bad advice your way when things are going so well for you.

This is so whatever good you’ve got going on will be ruined much faster.

#10 Tracking Apps Painted As Concern

I just want to make sure you’re okay!

No… you want to spy on me.

You want to know that I am where I say I am.

You want to ask me why I took a detour on the way home, even though I only wanted to post a letter.

Narcissists are jealous when you do things without them. If you dare do this, the request for tracking apps is a strong possibility. 

You have been warned!

#11 Rage

If I rage and shout and scream, the feeling of positivity and pride you currently have is going to disappear fast!

Narcissists will do that. Shout. Hollar. Whatever they need to do to prove to you that whatever you’re achieving, they can make more noise.

#12 Cry

I am happy for you, don’t get me wrong. I just need a moment.

This reminds me of a time I tried hard to do the same, and I failed.

I’ll be okay. No honestly, you celebrate.

Don’t feel bad about being happy.

As I write these phrases, I feel anger inside for all the genuine people who succeed authentically. 

This is why jealousy can rip away your happiness.

#13 “I Feel So Unwell”

Distract from you by pulling a sickie – classic!

And what can you do, blame them? The sick card is designed for maximum sympathy and omitting you from any celebrations due to you.

Now that is sick!

When You Stop Caring About The Narcissist They Will Do This!

As long as you love me only works when the narcissist is getting what they want from you. You have to comply, or the dynamics malfunction.

The moment – the very second you stop caring about the narcissist, you’d better take cover.

Not only does their response create the world’s worst emotional tornado – that tornado is an F5 – and it’s heading straight for you.

So what emotions get whipped up, and what exactly does each one mean?

Well, Alex, I’m glad you asked…

Narcissists Need You

The strength a narcissist needs to deny they need you is off the charts! They will deny and refuse to acknowledge that your presence is what’s keeping them going but…

…It’s all for the wrong reasons.

Narcissists destroy you in order to gain something for themselves. They take your world and crumble it in their hands without a second thought.

The love you feel from them is fragmented and temporary, but it’s enough to keep you caring.

You remain loyal, loving and hopeful.

And narcissists need that from you. If they don’t get it, the worthlessness that lies dormant in their empty souls will awaken.

So… what is about your caring nature that they can’t live without?

Your Care is Their Supply

Everytime you show you care, you are offering the narcissist supply.

Supply to them is emotional sustenance. It’s what keeps them going, and it’s sole design to maintain some form of self-worth. 

Needing supply is the main driving force behind many of their toxic behaviors.

This means you stop caring about yourself every time you put your own life or priorities to the side of the road to make room for theirs. 

And the narcissist?

They love it! They love knowing that you would drop anything and everything for them, and that’s the very part of you they abuse!

Can you imagine the horror of it being withdrawn?!

When It Stops?

The day you wake up and promise yourself that you will no longer care about the narcissist is the day your life is going to substantially alter. 

This is when things get really serious.

You’re choosing you for once in your life. You’re choosing to put your own needs first and, in turn, making huge improvements to both your emotional and physical health. 

What does it mean to apply all this energy and positivity to yourself? 

It means it’s unable to be converted to narcissistic supply.

Instead of pleasing the narcissist, you are healing and enriching you.

What Comes Next

I don’t promise initial warmth, kindness, happiness and joy from the narcissist. In fact, I’d bet you won’t get an ounce.

Thinking about it, why would you?!

You’ve done them dirty and stopped caring – so what on earth do you think they will be happy about?

What comes next is going to be all the ways the narcissist wants you to feel. They know that when you stop caring, doing these things will ignite these emotions in you:

• Fear. They want you to fear what they’re capable of. What they know about you. Making you scared to leave them because you’ve been programmed to believe you can’t live without them.

• Intimidation. Your lack of care directly threatens them, and they only know how to retaliate times one thousand! They aren’t going to appreciate you pulling back, and will bully you into being the old you.

• Emptiness. You’re worthless. Your lack of care doesn’t bother them, because you never meant anything to them in the first place. They don’t want to know you, and often you may hear phrases like, “You’re dead to me now.” 

1. Rage

Narcissists are like volcanoes – full of rage that lays dormant until they feel like unleashing it onto you. 

It can surprise you, and it shocks you. Once you see it, you will always anticipate it. 

When you stop caring about them – it is more than possible to witness their rage attacks.

2. Discard

They’re officially done with you. They aren’t interested in trying to woo you or impress you, not after what you’ve spoken up and discovered. 

You’re of no use to them now you have seen them for who they really are. They can’t manipulate you.

They can’t control what you do or who you see. You don’t need them. You no longer care, so to them – you’re yesterday’s news. 

3. Revenge

It is a possibility that the pot of revenge can be cranked up here. Narcissists don’t like to be given the cold shoulder, and to punish you, they will hatch a plan to get back at you. 

Think of revenge along the lines of:

• Spreading lies about you
• Turning people against you
• Throwing your stuff away before you’ve had a chance to claim it all back
• Finding somebody else and professing their true love for them

3. Hoover

It’s never past a narcissist to attempt to hoover you back. If it’s worked in the past, they probably think it might work again.

Think of the usual ways they hoover you. It could be:

• Showing up at your work to profess their love for you
• Stalking you on social media or in person
• Sending constant texts or making calls to you to try to get to talk to you
• Making promises to change and be the person you want them to be

It’s all a ploy to try and get the control back, and change the narrative that they’re the bad guy. 

One Life

Not to want to sound like the cheesiest person on the planet but; you really do only get one life. 

If being with them was bad enough, withholding your care will ignite a whole new level in their evil streak. 

And as always, it’s you who suffers. You will be the one who falls victim to all of what I have spoken, and there’s no escaping it. 

When you give everything you have to a person who fails to appreciate, acknowledge, or love you in return, you abandon your entire being.

As time goes by, that abandonment will reach into every part of your life. 

You want to fix them. You over-give. You try your hardest to take care of the narcissist.

Not only will you push your well-being to one side, but you will also start to feel as though you don’t deserve to have any kind of well-being.

You simply stop caring.

It might start small.

Skipping lunch.

Staying up late to lose yourself watching TV.

Saying you’re ‘fine’ all the time, even when you’re not.

Ignoring warning signs, like a pain, or feeling unwell.

Then it gets bigger.