The way they purposely go out of their way to make you feel it, am I right?
Raise your hands if you’ve ever been in that type of situation.
I see you all.
Narcissists are constantly looking for ways to make you the butt of jokes, even if it’s for their own pleasure.
But let’s start looking specifically here, because I can tell you now – I bet you can all relate to at least one of these 13 things.
Believe Me… They Try All The Time
I’d like to say that I don’t know what it is about narcissists that make them such unhappy toxic members of society, but I’d be lying.
I do know.
They hate themselves.
They can’t stand your happiness, success, achievements, kindness, empathy, love, and compassion—I could go on.
So, yeah. Any given opportunity to cut you down in your prime moment, they will do it.
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Having a good day? A narcissist will stop that!
Got that job promotion? A narcissist will take your joy away!
Offering the world a little joy? The narcissist will make you look and feel stupid!
You’d better keep your eyes peeled for these situations, because they’re going to happen to you if you are ever around one.
#1 Hide Things
Just where exactly did you put it? For the life of you, you cannot remember.
You swear it was on the side.
No. You left it in the car.
No! You actually had it in your dresser drawer.
Well, it doesn’t matter now, because the narcissist has moved it, and hidden it well from your view.
Not only that, they’ve gone to the extreme of accusing you of being forgetful, clumsy, stupid, or even more worrying – like you’ve got a real memory problem.
It’s a classic sign that they’re trying to make you feel crazy and stupid, and it happens a lot.
For example, a client I knew once told me that her ex-husband would demand she iron his shirt for work, and the iron would never work. She would plug it in and – nothing.
One time this happened, she disappeared to try to find a solution, and when she came back, she caught him putting the fuse back in the plug, switching it on, and yelling, “I’ll sort it out myself!”
Not great, right? But at least he was caught red-handed.
#2 Gaslight You
Point one was a form of gaslighting, but this point leads to the more direct ways a narcissist can gaslight you to make you look and feel stupid.
Really? Are you this stupid? Do you not remember?
I told you clear as day, how do you recall it a different way?
It’s simple.
The narcissist is going to take your reality – the correct reality – away from you.
As they replace it with their own, you’re going to be left feeling totally stupid most of the time as they manipulate what’s actually going on.
#3 Tell Personal Stories In Front of Others
I hate all of these points, but this one really takes the biscuit.
In front of anybody and everybody, the narcissist will make you feel or look stupid by relaying stories about you.
You fit the kitchen tap the wrong way around.
You filled the car up with the wrong kind of gas.
You came last in your school math competition.
You didn’t know the capital of Brazil once.
Whatever it is they can lay out for all to judge you on, they will do it.
#4 Mention Your Insecurities in Public
Oh, yeah they really don’t like their hair, what do you think of it though?
Do you see how uncomfortable they get whenever I mention their teeth?
They’re always telling me how much they feel overwhelmed at work, I think it’s their way of just not quite feeling up to task.
It’s like you want the ground to swallow you up so you disappear forever.
Your insecurities are personal to you, and you probably disclosed them mto the narcissist in a private setting, assuming that you could trust them to at least keep it to themselves.
Why would anybody who says they love you want to do this to you, and make you look so stupid?
The first thing they know others will do is look back at you. Checking that hair, or glancing at your teeth.
Job done for them. People are making you uncomfortable, and they just sit back and comically let it happen.
#5 Remind You That You’re “Unqualified”
There’s nothing more undermining than reminding you that you’re unqualified to have a certain opinion or thought.
Of course you aren’t, and you speaking up is obviously enough of a threat to them to want to put you back in your place.
I say refuse to be put there, and keep talking!
#6 Never Back You Up
Narcissists expect you to back them on everything, but they will never return that by being there for you and showing you that you matter.
It’s never not going to hurt, so either get used to feeling stupid, or leave.
#7 Non-Show
You’re waiting and waiting, but they don’t show up. They didn’t care enough to remember, or they didn’t care enough to make the effort.
I think both are as bad as each other, but I want you to know that this shouldn’t be the way you determine your worth.
#8 Sly Digs
Sly digs can be the worst, because they’re so subtle, aren’t they?
You think everyone else is listening and understanding what’s going on, but the digs are small enough for just you to comprehend.
If you feel stupid – the narcissist knows how covertly they carried the act out.
#9 Call You Out in Public
As if you need an audience to watch you turn rose red from embarrassment. As far as the narcissist is concerned, with a little luck you might even be the person people never forget in that moment.
You will always be remembered, and not for the good!
#10 Talk Over You
God, is there anything more infuriating?
You try to get your point across, but you get totally talked over by the narcissist.
The insurance of exuding their authority over you is crippling, and it can really make people feel beyond small.
It just goes to show how little they think of you. You might want to remember that the next time they tell you they ‘love’ you.
#11 Talk For You
Like you don’t have a voice!
You do!
The less you use it, the more the narcissist will love having you around.
You’ve got to break that cycle, and not look weak to everybody else. Your voice is your gift, and using it means retaining your opinions and thoughts…
…Before the narcissist steals them forever!
#12Hate Your Suggestions
Invalidating you is exactly what they love to do.
If you have a great idea, they will cut you down, steal it, and even steal it for themselves.
The sheer audacity!
#13 Ridicule Whatever You Like Doing
Your hobbies and enjoyments are personal to you. Not that the narcissist thinks so.
Do you ever feel like the narcissist in your life wants to make you feel that little more stupid just because you like what you like?
Well, it’s in the hope that you quit it.
Quit everything.
