Sometimes it’s good to go right back to the start, right?
The complex issues that narcissistic people cause to their victims is a tangled web, but stepping back and re-reading you the dangers of narcissists every now and then is wise.
Narcissistic behavior can sometimes be overlooked, even when you think you know them well and know they’d never be like that toward you.
It’s time to admit – they will be. Here are 13 simple signs of narcissistic behavior.
#1 They lie a lot, even to themselves
A lie is a lie, whether they want to admit it or not. Lying to you comes so naturally, telling you what they want you to hear so you react a certain way to fit their narrative and manipulation.
As for lying to themselves, they are masters at convincing themselves they’re liked, good people, and victims. It’s easier than admitting the truth, right?
#2 They ruin special occasions or days
Narcissists are infamous for ruining special occasions; holidays, birthdays or events.
In the lead up to any day of importance, they will create conflict, cause you to doubt yourself or dread it equally, give you the silent treatment, or start to blame you for everything if it causes upset and pain.
Eventually, you too will wish these events didn’t exist, and you will slowly learn to not celebrate, or want to celebrate anything.
#3 They make you feel never good enough
Chipping away at who you are will cause you to never feel good enough.
The dinner is never cooked properly. You are not quite as good at growing vegetables in the yard as their mom.
You just can’t quite master your job role at work. You never give them the support they need at the time they need it.
The list is long, but let me assure you, these are all subjective and conveyed to purposely make you feel low.
#4 They trick you
I once knew of somebody who used to take the fuse out of their iron before asking their wife to iron his shirts for work, then complain that she couldn’t get it to work.
Without looking, he’d slip it back and do it himself, making her feel like she was going crazy.
I hate to say it, but narcissists will do anything to trick you to make themselves feel great.
#5 The control…
It starts early, but you might not notice it at first. Narcissists always want to be in control.
They want a certain dynamic, and you fit within it. You’re literally a piece to their game, and if you defy that, you’re going to see narcissistic rage and potentially discard.
That’s how egotistical they are. Leaving you to follow their barking orders (or even the more covert orders) will mean you end up losing more and more of yourself as time goes by.
#6 They twist your words – talking is impossible
You try to get a word in, but you quickly realize they will not stop until they’ve got their point across, and won the conversation.
Be prepared for them to just repeat words back at you, like that’s all they have.
Taking your words and twisting them to suit them is also one way in which you know you’re dealing with a narcissist, too. What you’re trying to say, they will turn and blame you for.
#7 Hot and cold
One minute they’re all over you, telling you how much they love you. The next?
You’re in the way. You won’t stop pestering them. They want you to leave them alone. You’re too needy, or maybe they will just ignore you altogether.
Handling the hot and cold is difficult. You’ve got to try to predict the inconsistency which is just impossible.
And you shouldn’t have to!
#8 They future fake
I love you so much, I can’t wait to marry you.
We are going to have the wedding of the year.
I can’t wait to start a family with you.
I want to go on vacation with you this summer.
Sure, we can go there someday soon, I promise.
No matter what you hear, just know they’re saying it to appease you in that moment.
When it comes to the crunch, you do nothing but respond by living in hope.
#9 They overwhelm you then blame you when it all goes wrong
A toxic way a narcissist will overwhelm you is by whipping up an emotional storm that you feel you’ve got no choice but to enter with them.
Like a tidal wave of chaos, you’re in it, and then suddenly everything is your fault.
Why did you get so worked up?
Why are you being so unreasonable?
What’s with your snappy attitude?
Cleverly constructed to shine the blame away from them, it will make you feel like everything is your fault.
#10 They make you feel alone and unloved
In any kind of relationship, be it mutual or romantic, why should any person who actively says they want to be a part of your life treat you in a way that makes you feel alone or unloved?
It’s a huge question, and one I really want you to sit with. Narcissists will make you feel alone by isolating you slowly over time.
They won’t make you feel loved. How can anybody being constantly criticized possibly feel loved in any way?
It’s just another way for them to make you feel small and insignificant so they end up feeling better about their own sad, pathetic lives.
#11 They break your trust, so you think everybody can’t be trusted
Not trusting the narcissist is one thing, but a narcissist is also great at making you doubt the other people in your life, too.
Convincing you that their intentions aren’t good, you’ll learn to not trust or believe anything anybody says or does.
What a sad way to be made to live.
It doesn’t have to be that way, though.
#12 Anxious and depressed? “It’s your fault!”
Digging the hole of poor mental health before throwing you in it and telling you it’s your fault you’re there is typical narcissistic behavior.
You don’t recall feeling this way before, yet there you are feeling down and constantly on edge.
But they tell you that you only have yourself to blame.
It’s not a good place to be, and it certainly won’t make you feel any better about the situation you’re in.
#13 They make you sick … then leave
Pushing you to the point where you feel so unwell is bad enough. Then they go ahead and leave you on your own, like it’s not their problem.
Of course, they will never admit to it being their fault, that would mean admitting they’re actually very toxic.
Rather than that, they will paint you to be so troubled that they can’t possibly find a way to be with you any more.
Your problems are bigger than their love for you, even though those very problems were created by them.
So you’re left alone, and sick.
Classic narcissistic behavior, if you ask me, and a strong sign you’ve been caught up with one.
