12 Things The Narcissist Wants You To Believe That Are Not True

The narcissist has said it, so it must be true, right?

Right?

I mean, you trust them. You spend a lot of time with them. Why would they lie? What’s in it for them? Why would anybody want to hurt another person?

If you’re asking yourself those questions, you’re basing them on your own morals.

Narcissists have zero morals.

So here are the 12 things they want you to believe, that are simply untrue.

Trust Me… It Can Get Messy

Getting involved with a narcissist is like basically giving yourself permission to feel the worst you’ve ever felt in your entire life.

You think it’ll be okay, and you try to ignore the red flags, but there comes a time you can’t avoid them any longer.

These points aren’t a list of things you should be putting up with. They’re all warnings.

In fact, if you want to look at them all as red flags, then be my guest, because they are.

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#1 “You’re So Dull”

Any narcissist who tells you that you’re dull is doing it to make you feel like total shit.

There. I said it. And I mean it.

I refuse to hold back and make it fluffy, because it’s not.

There’s nothing fluffy about lies, and there’s nothing fluffy about narcissists, either.

They will tell you that you’re dull because you’re happy with yourself. You like who you are, and you want to be that person unapologetically.

The narcissist can’t understand it. How can this be? A person so comfortable in their own skin that they’re just living their life? Surely not!

Eventually though, that opinion of you being dull will be the opinion that you live by. And for the narcissist, it’s another job done in their eyes.

#2 “You’re Not Clever Enough For That”

Applying for a new job, are you? Well, you’d better not tell the narcissist, because at the first opportunity, they will take it away from you.

Listen, maybe you’re following your dreams and living life authentically to you, but the narcissist is having none of it.

They want you to believe that you aren’t clever so you live a life constantly dumbed down from what you’re actually able to do.

Believing them is giving them what they want, so prove them wrong at every chance you get.

#3 “You’re The Problem”

You’re never the problem, but it’s something that many victims believe about themselves, even years after a relationship with a narcissist ends.

I cannot tell you how many times I have told people that it’s not their fault. Narcissists are built to function in such toxic ways, but none of it was ever because you exist.

They only want you to think you’re the problem so it takes all the attention away from them. They don’t want to be blamed, so the best thing to do is point the finger at you instead.

#4 “You’re The One Who Needs The Restraining Order”

Are you really, though? You haven’t done anything wrong, let alone bother somebody to the point where it equates to harassment.

There’s legally nothing a professional can do if you aren’t guilty, so why would you believe a narcissist when they tell you that this is what they’re going to do.

This is just a way to intimate and bully you, and if you fall for it and panic, you’re g oing to be giving them exactly what they want.

#5 “Nobody Likes You”

It’s just not true. I don’t care if you argue back with me, I will stand by my word and die on that hill.

People do like you. People even love you. But you’ve accepted the narcissist’s word as true, and now you only think everybody hates you.

This is a cruel yet cunning way for the narcissist to isolate you and take away every ounce of your worth – but only if you believe them.

#6 “Your Weight is Changing and I Don’t Like It”

Putting weight on? Losing it? Weight is weight. It fluctuates. Life happens. We get sick, or we decide to work out more.

We lose ourselves in stress at times, and life changes. Our bodies can change with it, but to me it’s not the end of the world as long as you’re aware.

We all come in such a range of body shapes. So what is it if you look one way, and the narcissist comments that it’s different to before, or how they’d expect you to look.

You know what? If it wasn’t your weight, it’d be something else, and of that I am 100 percent sure!

#7 “You Don’t Need to Work. I’ve Got The Expenses Covered”

If a narcissist is making you think that you don’t need to work, you need to ask yourself why.

What is it they’re trying to prevent? Your independence? Money being earned? Your skillset improving? A work/social life? Are they trying to cut down your critical thinking so that you no longer own your own opinions?

Forget it. Don’t even believe this is the case. The narcissist may get the expenses covered, but they will let you know about it!

#8 “You’re Spending Too Much Money”

And there it is. You did leave your job. And look at what the narcissist is doing. They’re going through the bank statements with a fine tooth comb.

You’re to blame for it all. Look at how much you spent on this day or that!

Guilt trips will surface daily if you allow them to. Realistically, you’re not spending too much anyway, and you know it. Don’t be programmed to think otherwise.

#9 “Your Friends and Family Are Not Good For You”

You know they are and what a lie this is, but you’d be surprised just how well the narcissist paints the picture to the contrary.

The only way to isolate you is to talk you into thinking nobody cares or values you, and this is how narcissists do it.

And what? You trust their word, right?

You shouldn’t.

#10 “Nobody Else Will Love You”

That old chestnut.

Of course they would love you.

Narcissists are the only truly unlovable people in the world, and they love nothing more than to project that onto you and make you the one incapable of finding it again.

Don’t let them ruin your faith.