You think you’ve seen it all, until you get a narcissist in public. There are certain things they do that will cause their mask to melt on the spot.
No longer can they hide behind the protectiveness of their fake image, and that’s the moment they reveal who they really are to everybody around them.
It’s a sight to behold as they literally corner themselves and cause their internal character to surface.
Do you want to be there for it? Then look out for these 12 things.
#1 Talking Over Everyone
Whenever I’m around anybody who talks over several people all at once, I just want to excuse myself, drive home, and sit in my garden listening to nothing.
Honestly, it drives me crazy, but that’s because I know the person behind it is doing it on purpose.
That person is a narcissist. They fight every waking moment to be the center of attention, and I mean it when I say they will stop at nothing to be it.
It’s almost embarrassing to me that a person can feel the need to dominate a conversation so much that literally every other person can’t even speak a word in between.
For me, that’s when I check out, but you’d be surprised how many people out there lap up the incessant stories and anecdotes.
Pass the bucket for me to vomit into…
#2 Name Dropping Celebs
Oh wow, you know them? That’s so amazing! They worked with you once? They share a joke with you? You met them getting off the tube? You used to be neighbours with them when you were two years old?
Here we go. Another excuse for you to try to assert your importance in public, and to make you look more popular than you actually are.
It’s a classic narcissistic move. They don’t have real friends, so they think status and friendship comes from a tale told of a celebrity who I couldn’t care any less about.
What do you think? Is it important to be impressed by name droppers?
I just think, yeah, so what?
#3 Boasting Achievements
You did this, you went there, you saw that, you achieved that, you passed this; congratulations!
I mean if we’re going to do that, we could all boast about what our lives have brought us thus far.
We all have a right to be proud of our accomplishments, but if somebody is doing it publicly, loudly and frequently, you can bet they are sniffing like a hound for compliments or adoration from the masses.
And trust me, they really do get it from them. I think the key is to realize that you’re dealing with a narcissist, and almost immediately that adoration turns to pity.
I then retreat, knowing if I continue to offer them what they want I will lose myself to their ego. I really don’t want that, and neither should you.
#4 Belittling Service Staff
Is there anything more obvious to another person that they’re sitting opposite a narcissist than when you hear rude, sometimes derogatory comments aimed at a server?
I personally find it so telling when I see them be treated like they’re some kind of slave, or less than person. They’re at work, they’re doing their best and they want to help.
There’s really no reason to even be slightly rude to them, but if you witness it, you know a narcissist is shining a light on their true personality.
#5 Excessive Selfies at Every Opportunity
Quick, take a photo!
Get everybody in, but me at the front!
I can’t let this kind of opportunity to share this on social media pass!
Look at me!
Look where I am!
Look who I ‘m with!
Look at my hair!
Alright, we get it. There are 786 photos of you at the party from last night. Yay, lucky us being able to scroll through them all.
I can’t be the only one who cringes at this kind of thing, because honestly, it really is such a sickly way to behave.
It’s a real reflection on a person, too, when they can’t even just be more subtle with their narcissism.
#6 Loud, Attention Seeking Laughter
The kind of laugh that simultaneously sounds like claws down a blackboard as well as one that could literally stop traffic.
I hate hearing them, they send shudders down my spine for all the wrong reasons, but they’re done just like that to gain attention, and maybe even make people laugh as a result.
Narcissists will really stop at nothing to be the center of attention, and this is one of the worst ways.
Block your ears!
#7 Had Enough – Walking Out
They tolerate what they can tolerate – until they can take no more. Then they’re done. You can either follow them or stay, but either way you will watch them walk out.
Usually this is the kind of behavior you’ll notice when the narcissist has been questioned too much, or if they feel there is a rival among the crowd.
Rather than let it go and enjoy themselves, they’d rather leave. It’s a sign that they are weaker than you had them down to be.
#8 Compliments? Only Back-Handed
You’re so brave to wear that!
You look great for your age.
I wish I was as carefree as you about what I eat.
You’re actually smarter than I thought you’d be.
Wait, what’s happening here? You think you’re hearing nice things, but what you’re hearing is a level of passive-aggression that is unmatched.
To me, it’s like they’re saying, “Yeah I can notice you and make you feel terrible in this very public moment.”
Something to definitely look out for!
#9 Public Love-Bombing
Ugh. Is there anything more nauseating than seeing somebody fawn over their partner in public?
I don’t mean people have to cut out affection entirely, or be the opposite, but we don’t need to see those public displays at all.
In fact, the more we see, the more red flags may as well be waving around that person.
Public love-bombing makes the narcissist think they’re showing off a good side to themselves, but it’s actually far more unnatural than that to the other eyes looking.
#10 Stories That ‘One-Up’
Oh yeah? You have three cars? I have five.
You’re going to Rome for summer? I’ve been there three times. It’s not that special.
Oh yes, I know them so well. In fact, I speak with them most days.
It’s another opportunity for eyes to roll, isn’t it? I know that so many people get sucked into these kinds of stories and tales, but really, it’s got to be the worst thing to witness.
Nobody likes a show off.
#11 Hogging The Spotlight
This can be via the need to constantly interrupt, tell stories about themselves that nobody wants to hear, or just continue to talk slightly louder than everyone else.
Sometimes you will meet the calamitous narcissists who trip up or knock something off the table during a speech, to detract attention from the other person.
Honestly, I’ve seen it all.
#12 Mocking Strangers
What did the stranger do to you that was so wrong?
Why are you making fun of somebody at all, let alone somebody you don’t know?
It’s the height of cruelty, and I think it says so much about a person. Their narcissistic character will ooze out of every single critical word they decide to throw down in that moment.
Mocking anybody isn’t cool, but strangers? They may as well wear a T-shirt that says, “I am a Narcissist.”
Hey, why don’t we design one together?!
