It’s 2am. You’re (hopefully) asleep. You’re (hopefully) dreaming about that dream person – who is kind and thoughtful and emotionally mature.
While you’re busy in the land of nod, your phone gets a text from the person in your life who is the opposite of kind and thoughtful and emotionally mature.
When you wake – you discover exactly what it is they had to tell you at 2am.
And it’s going to be one of these 12 things.
2am? The Narcissist Hour!
Narcissists never sleep. I mean it. They really don’t. They’re somehow awake all hours of the day and night, probably due to the paranoia that fills up constantly inside of them.
You’re blissfully unaware of course, because you have a good sleeping pattern.
The narcissist loves to send you messages at 2am and you might think, “Wow, they’re thinking of me in the middle of the night, I must be so special.”
You’re not (not to them, anyway).
Instead, the narcissist is texting you at 2am to manipulate you into thinking that they care.
In fact – the real reason is because they simply want them to be the first thing you think about when you wake, roll over, and check your phone.
So, what are those 12 things they will text you in the dark of the night?
#1 “I Miss You”
What will happen when you read these three words is a feeling of nostalgia will wash over you.
Your mind will immediately revert to the few good times you had together, or the times they told you they couldn’t imagine living without you.
It will create emotions of wistful yearning, and you of course, wil feel obliged to reply. You feel wanted, loved and thought of.
It’s extremely unlikely – I’d say almost impossible – for a narcissist to miss you the way you want them to miss you.
This is about missing your supply, not you.
#2 “Remember When…”
Ah, yes. The familiar trip down memory lane. The narcissist wants to hold your hand and walk with you through all the fun times you shared, and pretend they all mean something to them.
The reality is a different story, but they know how emotional you are and how much you will latch onto this as a sign they still love you.
It’s not that at all. They want to test the waters to see if you will grab the bait.
Will you?
I hope not.
It’s another luring pattern only designed to control you.
#3 “I Saw This Person and Thought of You…”
Did they though?
Did they just want a useless and tenuous segway to text you in the middle of the night to make you feel like you’re suddenly somebody they care about?
You have to see through comments like this. If you think it’s because they’re feeling incredibly regretful that they let you go, you’ve really got another thing coming.
I’m not here to put you down and make you feel worthless – that was the narcissist’s sleight of hand.
But I am here to be realistic. And the things you hear them say when you’re apart come from the same pocket of games they played with you when the two of you were together.
Let them see and be reminded of whatever or whoever they want. It’s not your job to listen to be wowed by any of it any more.
#4 “This Song Came On…”
Songs are the perfect link to any memory, and some we may not want to be reminded of.
Narcissists know this. They know you, and how likely you are to sink back into a moment of nostalgia when you’re reminded of that first dance, or the sweet drive home in the early days.
And you know, these songs all seem more powerful at 2am, don’t they?
#5 “Are You Awake?”
Well, are you? If you aren’t, you’re probably going to be the next night when you anticipate another text.
It’s a real indication that a narcissist wants you day and night, no matter the time or hour. You need your sleep, and they need to stay away.
Try not to give your sleeping time away to anybody, especially your ex.
#6 “I Wish I Could Go Back and Make it All Better”
This gets to me, and it should get to you, too.
The narcissist had all this time to make it good, and to leave a lasting positive impression upon you.
Did they?
No, they didn’t.
Instead, they used all the time they had with you to drag you down, make you feel worthless, and to leave your soul and joy lying in tatters all over the floor.
So why now, when all the damage is done, do they want to crawl back and make it all better?
Don’t believe they can, because they absolutely cannot.
#7 “I Still Love You”
What is love, to you, narcissist?
I’d hazard a guess what they mean in translation is:
I’m bored and I miss the way you used to inflate my ego too easily.
That isn’t love, but it’s what you think love is now.
Anybody who loves you would go out of their way not to hurt you while they have the chance.
#8 “No, I’m Not Drunk”
Nothing like a nice disclaimer to get you started, is there?
It’s a really covert way of making you believe that they’re texting because they one hundred percent want to, rather than allowing the booze to do the talking.
The idea that they’re doing it sober is designed to prove to you how serious they are about making amends, or reconnecting.
I would advise you, beer or not, to leave them alone.
#9 “Do You Think of Me?”
You know, even if you do think of them, the last thing you want to do is let them know.
Don’t let them know that you aren’t either.
Just ignore this message, because it’s the most obvious fishing hook I can show you.
Don’t be baited.
#10 “Will You Meet Me?”
No!
I don’t care what they try to lure you in with.
If they have that t-shirt that’s yours – so what.
If they ‘just want five minutes’ – so what.
Don’t do it, because again, the 2am text vibe is going to be strong, and the last thing you want to do is allude to the gravitas of the dead of the night.
#11 “I’m Sorry”
Fine, be whatever you think sorry is or means. Does that mean you have to offer your forgiveness? I feel that’s the first thing they’re looking for, before the next question comes…
…How can I make it up to you?
They can’t, and you shouldn’t give them ideas.
#12 “I’ve Learned From My Mistakes”
Congratulations, that means nothing to you because the damage is done.
You cannot fix something that totally shattered. Your heart took a rip, and I know you know that the right thing to do is take some time to heal, rather than go through all that drama and misery again.
