Before we go any further, yes, I mean both physical and emotional things, and I am really going to dig deep into each of those areas with you today.
You see, narcissists aren’t restricted to just one area of your life.
They seep into every aspect, and as long as they are there, will rot them all to the core.
Here are 11 things you should never give a narcissist.
#1 Your credit card
I don’t know if this is something that I am telling you too late or not, but I hope it gets to you in time.
One of the first rules of any kind of relationship is that you must be established, bonded in healthy ways, and trusting and respectful of each other before you even begin to think about handing them your credit card.
What you’re doing when you pass it over is unlimited access to a credit score that you’ve worked so hard to achieve.
Not only that, but who is paying off the amount when it maxes out?
I know for a fact it won’t be the narcissist.
Never give them your credit card, no matter how much they promise to not abuse it.
#2 Access to your earnings
Similarly, if a narcissist is given access to your earnings such as you leaving your paycheck lying around, or telling them what you earn, all they will see in their mind is dollar signs.
They will be able to work out what you’re spending, what you’re saving, and the limits they can push you.
You’ll start to pay for much more than your fair share because they know you can afford it, even if it means you start to lose money or spend far more than you’re used to spending.
#3 Private information
Your private information won’t stay that way for long if the narcissist has anything to do with it.
If you share a secret, it will no longer be just between you and them, especially if they find it newsworthy enough for others to be impressed if they share it far and wide.
Narcissists can paint sharing your secrets as bragging, or being concerned about you.
Don’t buy any of it. There’s no concern involved at all where somebody is abusing your trust and yelling your innermost doings or thoughts without your consent.
Shame on them.
#4 Your trust
And here we are – trust as its entire concept!
This goes far beyond telling them secrets, and is more about trusting that the narcissist will never hurt you, or that they even mean what they tell you.
I know you probably wish you were in a place where the narcissist and you were able to do this as a two-way street, but it’s never going to be the case.
Not all the while they are narcissists (and that will never change as narcissists very rarely do).
#5 Your time
I know the majority of victims learn the hard way about giving narcissists their time. Once you give it, you cannot get it back.
Time goes by, and becomes the past before you know it.
Rather than have the regret that you gave so much of it away, start to be more careful with whom you provide your time in the first place.
Never give a narcissist a minute of your time, and you will find yourself living one of the best lives imaginable.
Take it from me!
#6 Your triggers
When you hand over your triggers to a narcissist, you’re giving them ammunition to fire at you when you least expect it.
I know you want to tell them everything about you, from what you love to what you fear, but your triggers aren’t what you should be sharing with anybody when you first meet unless that person is your therapist.
Your triggers are what send you from being comfortable and relaxed to on edge and in a fully panicked, traumatized state of being.
It’s never wise to overshare and give away too much of yourself. It will only be used against you.
#7 Your fears
Similarly, fears can be used in ways that will seem so innocent to the narcissist.
They have this habit of invoking fear before coming to your rescue, and all you will see is the savior in them, and not the instigator of negativity.
Your fear will be what drives the narcissist to get a reaction from you, and make you feel like you aren’t safe.
Telling them what scares you hands them so many ways they can gain control over you, manipulate you into feeling afraid, and ultimately then turning to them for solace.
#8 Your past failings in love
Your past is in the past, but when you share it with a narcissist, you’re sharing how you are in relationships.
You’re giving them hints and tips on how to act to cause pain, and how to get into your good books and spoil you rotten.
Helping them know this information can give them a headstart when it comes to how well they know your habits, and how to corner you emotionally.
It’s really dangerous to pass this information to them. Knowing your past like this means there’s every chance you will see familiarity shine, and capture you in all the worst ways.
#9 Your awe
What happens when you feel in awe of somebody?
You’re telling them that you are blindsided by their power. Just being in their presence makes you feel speechless, and you almost worship the ground they walk on.
For the narcissist, this will be fantastic news, but for you, not so much.
They will use your awe as a way to hide all their misdemeanors.
They will point at all their charm while they lie, steal and cheat, meaning you miss out on what they’re doing wrong, and how used you really are.
#10 Any attention
Attention is nice, but narcissists don’t just like a little bit of it, theythrive on it.
They are in their absolute element when they have a gathering of people around them listening intently to every word they speak.
On top of that, narcissists are so entitled that they expect attention. If they enter a room, they want to turn heads.
If they have big news, the world, according to them, should stop while they speak.
This is where they differ substantially from healthily regulated people, and the more attention you have to offer, the more they will take from you.
That means on those occasions you simply don’t listen or give them your all, you will be punished.
#11 Your heart
Sadly, giving your heart to a narcissist is a big mistake.
I know it’s tempting. You want them to know how loved they are, and you want so much to express it.
I urge you to rethink what love really is, and how much of it feels that way with the narcissist you know.
Love is about respect, and it does not ask you to give up your entire identity just to appease a person.
So please, before you think about giving your heart to a person, ensure you are doing it for the right reasons.
