I know! What a shock to see the words narcissist and vengeful in the same sentence…ge
… Of course I’m kidding. It’s no surprise at all that they would work well together, seeing as the narcissist needs no encouragement to misbehave.
The narcissist is a dangerous person, and will do anything to seek revenge on you.
There are 10 things that cause this, and if you really want to know them, you’d better buckle up and get ready.
Why Seek Revenge?
Whenever a narcissist feels threatened, they’re going to want to respond to it by reasserting their ego. I mean that in any way they can.
This isn’t just about standing up for themselves, or accepting that life doesn’t always go their way. Remember the character of a narcissist, here…
- Entitled
- Jealous
- Demanding
- Patronizing
- Superior
- Grandiose
- Toxic
You’re not going to want to see them when they want revenge. Being wronged is not on their list of ideal things to experience or tolerate, so expect dramatic punishments.
All in the name of making themselves feel briefly better.
#1 Exposing Them
If you’re brave enough to expose a narcissist, then I do applaud you. In a way, I wish all narcissists could be exposed, because only then will they have what they deserve.
More than that, it would give some kind of justice to all victims who fight to be heard and believed on a daily basis all over the world.
It’s a difficult thought to know that so many suffer.
But exposing them comes with one, very large, problem.
The narcissist will want revenge.
They will want payback for putting them under the negative spotlight, revealing to many or all who they really are and exactly what they’re like behind the mask of charm.
#2 Not Giving Them The Attention They Crave
Due to their incredibly high levels of insecurity, narcissists don’t only want attention, they crave it.
It’s an addiction to them, and while they don’t necessarily want negative attention, they fight for positive attention every day.
It can be you, the mailman, their boss, or a stranger in the street. Whoever is willing to provide it, they will snatch it up.
And when you refuse it, and starve them of attention, they will hate you for it. Why stop? Don’t you know who they are?
Yes, you do. That’s the very reason you can’t keep giving it to them.
Well, prepare for a showdown.
#3 Getting on Fine Without Them
Lucky for you that you’re dealing with life just fine without their murky, sneaky presence.
Congratulations to you for keeping them at bay with your positive attitude and carefree ways…
…But wait…
…What’s lurking in the darkness?
The narcissist! They see you not giving a damn about them and focusing on yourself.
This simply has to stop! Don’t you need them for something? Isn’t your reliance game strong?
Why not?
Narcissists need to be needed so they feel they have a place in the world. They can’t create that place alone, so they are counting on others to do it for them.
What a shame you don’t give a damn…
It’s only those who don’t give a damn who will be punished for feeling that way.
The narcissist will try their best to ensure your independence is damaged in some way, so you’d better watch out for their toxic, twisted attempt at game-playing.
Things could get pretty nasty…
#4 If They’re Criticized
Watch out, the narcissist is coming for you if you dare criticize them!
I know what you’re really doing, though. You’re not hiding. You’re standing there, open-mouthed at sheer double standards of it all! And you’d be right to.
Imagine if you took revenge on the narcissist every time they criticized you. You’d be living a constant life of sin!
But it doesn’t work both ways, and this is one strong example of that.
And it can get pretty dangerous.
If you criticize them, you’re immediately a threat to them. It’s not in your best interests to do this, as what they’ve got lined up for you is going to be so unpleasant.
Prepare for rumors. Lies. Discard. Silence.
And that’s just the start.
#5 Rejecting Them
There’s not a narcissist on the planet that sits comfortably when being rejected.
They take it so personally. It always makes me wonder how they get by in life until I connect the dots and understand why they operate how they do.
The rejection pattern of a narcissist is always fear-based. They don’t want somebody to do it, because all they hear or see is, you’re not good enough.
It’s strange to think this is what goes on in their minds, yet the way they themselves abuse is by making their victim not feel good enough.
Fear will present as anger, and if you’re the one doing the rejecting, be prepared for total revenge.
#6 Being Abandoned
To hide any fear or realization that they actually weren’t good enough, the narcissist will seek revenge on those who abandon them.
You can notice them trying to:
- Pin any blame on you.
- Tell others that you were abusing them.
- Reassert their power by finding someone new quickly.
- Buying an expensive item to make themselves feel better Maybe a car, or a new item of jewelry.
I knew a client once whose first husband experienced his first wife cheating on him. When it became public, he left the city they lived in, and moved three hours down the road to a small town where nobody knew him.
He would have rather started again and punished her by leaving rather than stay to fix it, or be the one to say I was cheated on.
#7 Oh, You Have Boundaries?
If the narcissist can step over those boundaries, then all will be fine.
If they can’t, you’ll have a pretty rough time of it.
It won’t last forever, but they only see you as the person they know. They will react very defensively if you change and decide you want to protect yourself.
That usually presents in anger or rage, but let them.
It’s better to assert your moral lines than have them repeatedly abused.
#8 Embarrassing Them in Public
How dare you.
No, I mean really.
This is a terrible thing to do, and unforgivable.
You will not only be punished—and prepare for what that could look like—but you will also learn never to do that again.
#9 Challenging Them
Disagree with them?
Refute their claims?
Tell them they’re wrong?
Woah.
Good luck, you. You’re going to need it.
#10 When You Finally Move On
Moving on is the final nail in the coffin for you both, but I believe it can only be a good thing for you. It proves what you’re no longer willing to put up with.
The narcissist will always think you’re going to go back to them, so if you signal that it won’t happen, they will smear your name across town like it’s mud.
