You’re looking at that person with a raised eyebrow. Something doesn’t feel right.
You’d love to have it confirmed that they’re a narcissist, but you just need that little bit more proof.
Today, I’ve got that proof for you. Not only that, I have also got ways you can respond to them in order to get the upper hand.
Sounds like a great idea? Then look no further, because here are those 10 signs.
#1 They don’t listen to you
You can talk and talk until the cows come home, but let’s be honest here, if you aren’t being listened to, alarm bells should soon start to sound.
And these alarm bells should sound like this:
Beep – narcissist in the house – beep.
You open your heart, dish out information, remind them of something important that needs doing, or even ask for help; and nothing.
They don’t even pretend to care unless there’s something in it for them, and that’s how you know they’ve applied their narcissistic ear filter.
This is when they listen to key words that take their interest. If none do, you may as well be talking to yourself.
Respond by refusing to use them as somebody you think you can rely on. Find other forms of support in friends or family.
The less the narcissist hears about you, the less they are able to control.
#2 They keep interrupting you
There’s literally nothing worse than talking and keep being interrupted by the narcissist, especially when they do everything they can to turn the conversation back around onto them.
You sit there thinking, “What will it take for them to shut up and let me talk?”, but in truth, they don’t like your voice, and they certainly don’t like you using it.
Respond by continuing to talk even when they interrupt. When they stop talking, ask them, “Is there a reason why you keep talking over me?”
If they continue, refuse to engage with them and make that a clear boundary for the future.
#3 Their laugh overpowers the entire conversation
When you are actually having a conversation with a narcissist, you’ll find it will take on regular intervals just so the narcissist can let out their arrogant, loud, attention-seeking laugh.
They will either be laughing at something you said, something they relayed, something they did, or how you are even talking.
Either way, it will make onlookers think, “Wow this looks like a fun conversation,” and leave them seeing the narcissist as that very image themselves.
Respond by walking away. Do you even need to be part of a conversation that lacks so much of what you’re looking for?
#4 They try to find sneaky comments that derail your thought
Talking to a narcissist will become plainly clear when you see them try to sneak in comments that totally throw your thought process off the tracks.
Why do you spit when you talk?
Is it bin day tomorrow?
Where did I leave my keys?
Is it me, or is it cold?
You were in a flow, but now you’re thinking about whatever they’re saying, and giving that all your attention.
Respond by anticipating this very move. Be aware of what you are saying, and when they sneak in comments, ask them if they mean to interrupt you.
#5 They play on your insecurities
There’s just something about the way they look at you as you’re talking.
The studying of your face and what you’re wearing, looking you up and down as you speak.
Zoning in on a facial feature, or even speaking up about a topic you know you don’t feel overly secure about.
You know you’re talking to a narcissist when this kind of crap happens.
Respond by observing them as if they’re trying unsuccessfully to find fault with you.
Look at them as joy-breakers, who are intent on making other people feel small, no matter who that person is.
#6 They keep asking personal questions
What is it with narcissists? They think they have the right to ask whatever they want, and they also feel entitled enough to have the answer, too.
Narcissists are famous for overstepping, and assuming that you’ll be okay with what they throw your way.
Respond by laughing at them when they ask a question that doesn’t sit well with you.
Follow the laugh up by saying, “Do you feel comfortable asking such personal questions?” They won’t know what to do with themselves, or where to look.
#7 Disagreement is their middle name
You open your mouth to talk, and the moment you do, the narcissist cross examines what you say.
They contest it, looking for an argument because that’s what they thrive on.
Normal people don’t do that so outwardly, although it’s normal to not agree all of the time.
Respond by saying, “It looks like whatever I say, you have a problem with. Perhaps we should end the conversation there.”
Cut them off before you give them another chance to puff out their chest and yell again.
#8… Unless they start mirroring you!
Mirroring is a sure fire way to know you’re talking to a narcissist, and things can get pretty fun trying to ascertain if that’s the case!
From watching them agree with everything you say, to even finishing your sentences. Narcissists even copy your body language, and tell you that they ‘know exactly what you mean.’
This tactic is meant for you to find a strong and immediate connection with them, and is done to hook you in and keep you wanting more.
Respond by stepping back. If something feels too good to be true, it often is.
Don’t be fooled just because a charming person feels like the missing piece to your puzzle within ten minutes of knowing them.
#9 They mock whatever you’re saying
Childish? Yes. Typical of a narcissist? Also yes.
Being mocked is their way of trying the lowest of the low ways to get under your skin.
Whether it’s how you talk, how you tell a story, what you’re wearing, or what you’re actually saying.
Respond by stopping the conversation in its tracks. You don’t have to tolerate it so change your environment by changing who you speak with.
Narcissists are not the Gods they think they are.
Nowhere near, in fact.
#10 They tell you they don’t have time to listen to you
Narcissists treat time like a finite oil that is only found in one corner of the world.
If you’re worthy of it, they will make you feel on top of the world, but it will never remain permanently.
If talking with somebody creates the reaction of, “I don’t have time for this,” then you will immediately awaken to the reality that you’re speaking with a narcissist.
Don’t be disappointed by their lack of time. Instead, be relieved that they basically told you in no uncertain terms that they are toxic.
If anything, I’d call that a lucky escape.
Respond by never making that same mistake again.
Keep them at a distance, and hold back when they come to you at a later date asking what you wanted to talk about. They don’t get to do that to you.
