Good morning!
How are you?
Did you sleep well?
If you are with a narcissist, the chances are, you always sleep with one eye open. What will they say or do next to get under your skin? How will they blame you today?
Narcissists reveal themselves a lot of the time. They’d like to think they’re perfect, sure.
But they’re not.
When they slip up – you will see them finally for who they are. And you know when some of the best times to witness this revelation?
The morning!
Barely awake, with not all guards up – you can spot them a mile off.
And here’s how!
Why Morning? Routine!
Joining the dots is the best way to understand the narcissist’s obsession with their morning routine, and we start with cycles.
The cycle of each morning rolling into a new day is a cycle the narcissist loves to know is coming.
They know what to expect, they have their habits within reach. It’s all there. But where does it come from?
For a start, let’s pull apart the word cycle. Narcissists abuse their victims and follow the cycle of abuse that allows for that.
I love you, you’re amazing.
Whatever.
I’m done here.
I’m sorry.
That’s pretty much the cycle of every narcissistic relationship until it ends, but that cycle is familiar. That’s what the narcissist likes.
That’s why they are big creatures of habit.
Keeping Your Eyes Peeled
If you’re unsure whether or not the person you’re with is a narcissist, I ask you to open your eyes.
Watch what’s going on, and how they act. Does their behavior make you feel good, or not?
Have you changed as a person since you met them? Do you see less of your friends and family? How’s your self-esteem and confidence doing?
Keeping your eyes peeled for potential narcissistic traits can help you answer these questions, and it all starts first thing in the morning.
10 Morning Habits: Watch Out!
#1 Rigid Routine
Narcissists love a rigid routine because it means they don’t necessarily have to predict what’s going to happen.
They like to have their morning planned to the tee, so nothing can go wrong to put a downer on the rest of their day.
The routine of the narcissist is likely to be something nothing and nobody will or would interfere with. That’s when you will start to see the fiery, unforgiving side of a narcissist.
And of course – you will totally be at fault.
#2 Not Liking To Be Bothered
Waking up and starting your day can be a longer process for some than others, and not everybody likes to be bothered first thing.
Narcissists take this to a whole new level. If they are busy preparing their ego and image for the day and you step in with an emergency, request or general conversation, you will hear about it.
Can’t you see I’m getting ready?
How would you like it if I interrupted you getting ready?
Prepare for the wrath.
#3 Ignoring You
As far as the narcissist is concerned, who says they have to talk to you?!
It’s pretty rude if you live or work with somebody like this, but they will give their game away quickly if they act like this toward you.
Again – not every person is a morning person, and I know I can wake up a little grumpy if my sleep wasn’t so good.
This is a different story altogether, and something you should be moderately ready for.
#4 Focusing On Their Day
Narcissists want every day to be perfect. If you try to come between that idea, you’ll pay the emotional fine.
It’s costly being around somebody so draining, and their toxicity will rinse you of any joy.
However – it’s incredibly revealing to see somebody so intent on focusing on themselves and not at least pay your day a little attention.
If you have an important meeting, or a job interview you’ve been preparing for, it’s nice to chat about it, or be wished good luck.
But with narcissists – it’s never about you.
Not ever.
#5 Building Their Image
What can I do to be the best I possibly can be today?
How can I fool everybody else?
In what ways am I able to look better than those around me?
How can I impress people?
All these questions are subconsciously circling around the mind of a narcissist as their day begins.
Who will they see that day? How can they present? What can they do to gain even more attention or respect from others?
The image is the most important aspect of a narcissist. Without it, they’re just people nobody looks at or notices.
#6 Silent Treatment
If you are given the silent treatment each morning, you’ll likely hear excuses like:
I am tired.
I’ve got a long day ahead of me.
I’m just trying to get ready.
Why do you keep bothering me when I am eating my breakfast?
You know I have a lot to plan for the day.
It’s somehow your fault, but the silent treatment will follow…
…And it’s regular.
#7 Probing You For Answers
What are your plans for the day?
Who are you seeing?
What hours are you working?
Do you need to go to the store after work?
Will you be late home?
Shall we meet for lunch?
These aren’t questions from somebody caring or interested – they instead want to map out your day so they know exactly where you will be when you say you’ll be there.
This is all about control, and they will do it every morning.
#8 Making Empty Promises
I would love to go out with you after work tonight.
Shall I book a table?
I can’t wait to call and at lunch and catch up.
Promises like this each morning keep you happy for the day, and leave you with one hand on your phone ready for that call.
Except it doesn’t come. They make excuses. And they’re always too busy or tired to go out. Maybe they deny even offering to do so.
#9 Lazy? A Possibility!
If you dare have a day off, or without much planned, prepare to be called out for it.
As the narcissist frantically gets busy for their day, your day is going to look a lot less chaotic.
And believe me when I say you’ll be made to feel bad for it!
#10 Reinforcing Their Role
Well, looks like I’m set for another day of making money.
Those bills aren’t going to pay for themselves.
It’s a good job somebody who lives here is loyal to their responsibilities.
I suppose you’ll just be doing nothing all day?
I don’t expect you to wait up for me. I’ve got a busy day today.
Again – these comments are riddled with guilt and are designed to set your tone for the day.
Don’t you think it’s time you set your own tone?
