The narcissist looks at you, and what do they see?
They see a person who is unafraid to be themselves, to the point where they are happy to sabotage it.
To them, you aren’t human at all. You’re just a person who they can play with, control and manipulate.
I’ve got 10 examples why the narcissist doesn’t see you as a human being. I wonder how many you are familiar with.
#1 Your feelings are just inconvenient
All humans have feelings, right? So why is it so bad that you have yours at all, let alone around the narcissist?
It’s because narcissists don’t like you to have feelings, they just want you to do as you are told.
If you’re sad, it’s not confident. If you’re happy, that’s not right either.
No matter how you feel, the narcissist will see a problem with it, which is why you aren’t even seen as human to them.
You’re nothing but a big inconvenience, and that’s how they want it to remain.
#2 They don’t care about your boundaries
No narcissist on this earth cares a single bit about your boundaries. They don’t even register that you have any because to them, they are exempt from any boundary.
You can try to implement them all you want to, and do so with your best interests at heart.
That doesn’t mean the narcissist has to pay any attention to them, making you not even closely resembling a human being.
Long term, not caring about your boundaries will lead you to not care about them, either.
Then what? You just let anybody walk all over you and treat you like dirt.
Good news for the narcissist, but not so good news for you.
#3 They only acknowledge you when they need something
Narcissists don’t look at you as a person who is supportive and kind, and who may need that shown back at them from time to time.
In fact, support is a one-way street when it comes to narcissists. They will use and utilize everything you offer, without giving a single thing back in return.
The only time the narcissist wants to know you is when they want something. They need your help, they want you to cover for them, or they need a loan.
I don’t think this constitutes a healthy relationship, do you?
#4 Your pain is seen as overreaction
We all feel pain from time to time in life, and as hard as it can get, we turn to the right people for support.
The right people don’t include any kind of narcissist. Your pain to them is seen as an opportunity for them to roll their eyes and sigh.
You are overreacting again.
You are harping on about your pain yet again.
Is there never a moment where you might want to change the record?
Why should you if you are going through a tough time?
The narcissist should be jumping at the chance to comfort you, not insult you for showing your vulnerable side.
#5 Your kindness is seen as weakness
No kind person is truly weak. To be able to stop and put somebody else before you is a gift not enough people on this planet possess.
If we were all that way inclined, there would be far less war and far less hate.
But hey, narcissists don’t know the first thing about being kind, so they’re quick to label you weak because it’s better than showing their jealousy at your compassionate side.
I don’t want you to think that you are in any way, shape or form less of a person because you think of others and strive to make their lives better.
#6 You are a role in their life, not a person
To the narcissist – in fact any narcissist – you are playing nothing but a role in their life.
There’s no human aspect about you at all, in fact, you are simply somebody who serves nothing more than a purpose.
If you are the nurturing mother to children you share, then that is your role and duty. If you bring home the money, then that’s all you’re good for.
The narcissist will do what they can to keep you sweet and make sure you keep your role flowing and flourishing, but they will never treat you like the human being that you are behind that part of your identity.
#7 Your experiences are invalidated constantly
This is one part of the topic that truly riles me the most, and it is the invalidation of your experiences.
I don’t just mean once in a blue moon, I mean every single day you are with a narcissist.
They will mock you for what you did that day, or tell you that you are reading too much into something.
They will laugh at your pain and tut at your difficult days, and this is constant.
Who would do that to another human being? It’s beyond me that this type of behavior even exists, but it does.
#8 They only show empathy when it suits them
If there’s something in it for the narcissist, they will show empathy without hesitation.
If there are people watching, narcissists jump at the chance to reveal a kind side to them, even if it is temporary and fake as anything.
If it makes them look good, or they get a little something at the end of it, they will be all in trying to help you and come to a helpful conclusion for you.
This is confusing for the person on the receiving end because one minute the hot tap is running, the next, the cold tap can’t even be switched off.
This treatment in itself is unbelievable, and proves that they don’t view you as a human being, but as a person they can swoon over or ditch within five seconds of each other.
#9 Your emotions are used against you
When your emotions are used against you in the regular way they inevitably will with a narcissist, you have to ask yourself if they view you as human at all.
There’s nothing settling about feeling guilty for your happiness, or feeling ashamed of being proud of yourself.
The narcissist will make you feel that without hesitation, because they want to be in control of everything about you.
That means you cannot be seen as human to them, but just a source of supply they’ve got a grip on.
#10 They discard you with zero remorse
When you’ve spent a great deal of time with a narcissist, don’t for one moment assume that this will lead to a faithful and loyal relationship long term.
Narcissists are able and willing to discard you whenever they see fit, and will do so.
From ghosting you to totally dropping you like a hot potato and moving onto someone new; the narcissist will do what they need to do in order to protect their reputation.
There will be zero remorse, which means they don’t think about the humanistic side of that kind of treatment.
To them, you are just ap awn in their hess game, and nothing more.
