If a narcissist is around children, you’re going to get one of two versions of them.
Because my aim is to educate you as much as possible, I want to offer how disturbing they can be with people around, and without.
Either way, you will probably stare at them wide-eyed, wondering what on earth has possessed them.
So let’s look at 10 disturbing ways narcissists act around children.
I hope you’re ready!
#1 The life and soul of the party
With!
When people are around the narcissist and they have a bit of an audience, they will act like the life and soul of the party.
Kids will be drawn to them because of this energy they give off that reads, “I am a fun person to be around!”
In truth, it’s so easy to get an audience from kids because they’re attracted to the silly and playful side of any adult.
If there’s a game to be played, or laughter to be had, they will be all in.
Of course, as a fellow adult, you know the truth, right?
And as much as the kids are loving this magnetic person being goofy, the real person under that mask is abusive, dark and twisted.
#2 Generosity central
With and without!
This is a trick answer, because in truth, narcissists can be generous with or without an audience looking on.
If they know somewhere down the line at a later date there’s something to be gained from their own generosity, they will give and give.
Usually that means wanting good behavior in return, or 100% on a test, or even obedience.
Then you have the audience, where generosity can be witnessed by people they want to make a good impression on.
Either way, you’re looking at a disturbing act!
#3 The caring soul
With.
Narcissists want other people to see how caring they are as a parent, but behind doors, those children know the truth.
When it comes to showing off empty parental traits of good, narcissists will place children on a pedestal.
They will celebrate them, laugh with them, and encourage them to engage in ways that improve the reputation of the narcissist.
As soon as the crowd dissipates, the narcissist will turn off the charm and act as though those very same children don’t even exist.
It won’t take long for that mask to slip.
#4 Coldness in the blink of an eye
Without.
When a narcissist is without an audience, the coldness will set in immediately.
They don’t want to pretend all of the time, so narcissists create a small circle of people they can totally be themselves in front of without apology.
Children fall into that category because narcissists mistake little people for being dumb, when in fact, they are incredibly switched on to these kinds of behavior changes.
Coldness comes when they’ve got nobody to impress. Isn’t it revealing that they would do that to children, of all people?
#5 Impatient
Without.
Do you expect a narcissist to be patient around their kids? Well if you do, you’re in for a world of disappointment. They aren’t.
This is something they struggle with, even with an audience, because children can be unpredictable, and the mask can sometimes start to slide off unintentionally.
Impatience starts with the belief that you are better than everybody else, and that you shouldn’t have to tolerate people testing you. Patience begins when you leave your ego at the door and try to understand others, even kids.
Try telling that to a narcissist…
#6 Unbothered
Without.
You’d think the presence of a child would awaken a little spark in a person, wouldn’t you? Not so much for narcissists.
Look what I did today!
Will you play a game with me?
Even just the innocent dancing or doings of a young person should be enough to create a little joy and laughter, but this isn’t the case if you are toxic from the inside out.
They don’t care. They aren’t bothered. They won’t engage. They don’t view kids as special, just annoying little attention grabbers.
#7 Critical
Why on earth would you dress like that?
I know you keep wanting to watch this movie/show, but to be honest, it’s boring and I want something new.
Why can’t you be more like your brother/sister?
Why do you insist on making so much noise?
I could write a book with the amount of criticisms that narcissists come out with, but instead, I will leave the rest to your imagination and maybe even experience.
Kids are supposed to be growing and making mistakes and learning, not being stomped on by a negative, manipulative, miserable piece of work such as the narcissist.
#8 Magnetising
With.
It can only be with people around, right?
Then there’s the flip side. I’m sure you’ve seen it or been in that place before where a narcissist goes all in and gets all the kids absolutely hooked, either with a talent they have, or a pastime they’re in charge of.
And it truly does make your blood boil when the kids react so positively and almost in awe of this person, because you know underneath that facade, there is a really abusive character at play, and nobody has the slightest inkling because it’s so well hidden.
I find that truly disturbing to witness.
#9 Controlling on another level
Without.
Kids are a narcissist’s dream, but I don’t want you to mistake that for the innocent, wonderful little bundles of joy that they are.
This is not that.
I am talking about how much the narcissist loves control, and what type of person can they control the best?
Children!
Children are impressionable, and will listen and do as they’re told by the adults in their lives.
It’s how they learn a lot of things, from behavior, to response, to emotions, to rules and regulations.
Of course, it’s natural for a child to assume the adult in their life is responsible and so they will follow orders, but that’s exactly what gives the narcissist that ego boost the most.
In that respect, kids are the ultimate dream where control is concerned, and it is another level.
Let’s get it straight though, this isn’t good control. It’s never for the good of the child.
They never act in ways that will help the child, just keep them as small as possible for as long as possible.
#10 As if they aren’t even there
Without.
And this one can get very hurtful in the long term. Children need consistency, and they thrive on being able to have an adult around that they can rely on.
This is a rural reminder that narcissists only want kids around when it suits them.
The rest of the time, they’re treated as if they don’t even exist.
And children get very confused by this, wondering what they did wrong, or waiting for that mood to change, but that will only be down to whether or not the narcissist feels like it.
There’s that control again!
It’s a very disturbing way to behave, and I know you will agree. But it’s always the innocent ones who suffer the most.
