Q: Hi there, I just found your site and have been reading your articles all day. Good stuff, thanks! I’ve been aware of NPD for about 5 months now and have done a lot of reading, watched vids etc.
I broke up (went no contact) with my sister in March. She has been abusing me emotionally and bringing me thru the narc cycle (i’ve been supply) for 35-40 years. My question is re: no contact. She’s sent me a bunch of gifts in the mail to my address, but they are not from her address, they are from online stores, so i can’t send them back to her address.. i did not know they were from her until after i opened the box/envelope. What do i do with this stuff? Tape it up and put “delivery refused” or what? They are from 3 different online stores with addresses on the return label. I’m really upset by her attemps at lovebombing me AGAIN after all the abuse she has put me thru- and i decided i’m done.
A: Congratulations on going NO CONTACT with your abusive sister. She is just trying one more sneaky way to get you to give her Supply. If you mail them back in any form- that is giving her attention. Continue NO CONTACT by…not having contact, not even by mailing items to her. It would be the equivalent of answering her phone calls. Don’t do it! NPD or abuse of any kind excuses normal etiquette. You can use the items if they don’t bring bad feelings, return them to the store for money or item exchange, or you can donate them to a person or charity that needs them.
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